edgemaster72,
@edgemaster72@lemmy.world avatar

Why was there no body? Is the dog a murderer? Or the interviewee?

Algaroth,

Dog was buried above a murder victim.

Floey,

youtu.be/e1ejN6hlfsM?si=n7FL2yKSDQCrZ9aa

Never judge a book by its cover.

Faresh,

If we cut out the context of that anecdote we get something resembling those weird recovered Sumerian jokes.

LemmyKnowsBest,

They used to give us drivel made-up stories like this at church. Feed a beggar who comes to your house, and later you find out it was Jesus and now you’re eternally blessed. 🫤 yeah that seems sweet and all but I clearly remember one instance when one of our naive church members fell for something like this in the real world and the beggar turned out to be a scam artist.

And that’s why we modern jaded people don’t do nice things for others anymore.

But if it was a literal dog on the road? sure :-) dogs aren’t commonly as manipulative and scoundrely as humans can be.

beckerist,

For anyone else wanting to know more about 3000+ year old humor, please check out Irving Finkel on YouTube. He’s hilarious, intelligent, spunky and keeps his talks interesting. I can kill an hour listening to him before I realize it.

One example: youtu.be/hDA6oIiQS4E

Got_Bent,

Somebody could make a great dystopian movie using LinkedIn posts as a basis for the script.

funkyfarmington,

It’s not already a dystopian movie that we live in? It sure does feel like one.

sukhmel,

So, a great dystopian documentary then?

Imgonnatrythis,

This really makes you think.

Algaroth,

About dogs in my case.

xantoxis, (edited )

Yesterday me and my interview candidate went out for a walk during the interview. We came across a starving dog and I realized it was time for a test for my candidate. I asked him, “What would you do with this starving dog to keep profits high?” And then he kicked the dog into the path of a car! Blood and guts and fur everywhere! I smiled and said, “Right answer! You’re hired. But next time make sure you don’t get any on your boss, ha ha!” And he laughed too, “ha ha!”

And that’s how you hustle.

CarlsIII,

Great. Just when I thought the shitty “nobody” meme was dying, it evolves and makes even less sense.

pensivepangolin,

Have you ever considered…not being cranky?

starman2112,
@starman2112@sh.itjust.works avatar

Nobody:

Me: I’ll stop being cranky about it when people stop pointlessly appending “nobody:” to their comments

CarlsIII,

I’ll stop being cranky when there stops being things to be cranky about.

sukhmel,

Which is probably never

Algaroth,

I wish there was something in between upvotes and downvotes. I relate to this in that it is cathartic to complain about things but at the same time I hate that there is so much to be bitter about.

CarlsIII,

I always figured that’s what upvoting without boosting is.

sukhmel,

I would say that doing nothing is pretty much between upvote and downvote 😅

Algaroth,

True, but I want people to know I did nothing.

Kase,

If it makes you feel any better, I found the post, and it’s 2 years old lol

navi,
@navi@lemmy.tespia.org avatar

I like how this was posted on LinkedIn.

GentlemanLoser,

Why the fuck would I want to work for a starving dog

Fixbeat,

Dog was just pretending. This is ceo dog.

Kuvwert,

He’s a good boy

HerbalGamer,
@HerbalGamer@sh.itjust.works avatar

If he has time to go be homeless his job isn’t that important right?

Fixbeat,

CEO=dead weight

ericisshort,

I had that dog as my interviewer too, but I made the wrong decision.

When I got the to interview, I immediately remindend him that when I saw him on the street, I said “Sorry I can’t feed you, I have a job interview so that I can get food. You should pull yourself up by your own bootstraps and get an interview so you too can get some food.” And he said “Yes, I took your advice and arrived here first and got the job you were going to interview for, so you’re fired.”

VikingHippie,

got the job you were going to interview for, so you’re fired.

Damn, failed so hard you broke causality by being fired from a job you never had!

ericisshort,

Yep. I already broke the premise, so I thought it would be even funnier to finish by breaking causality.

VikingHippie,

Good call.

Alsephina,

Dhar mann video

Merwyn,

Not accurate at all. You need a lot more paragraph, even better if you cut them every 2 sentences, and emoji at the end and beginning of every sentences.

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