Smorty,

Why can’t i be her?

TotallynotJessica,
@TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world avatar

That’s why you only make friends with toxic misanthropes who hate each other 👍

AsherahTheEnd,

“Make friends”? Is that some form of magic spell I never learned? Jokes aside I have severe social anxiety, I feel it is almost impossible to make new friends haha. The friend group I refer to here is all from elementary school and I’m nearly 30 now… They’re just drifting away regardless of what I do to try to stop it

TotallynotJessica,
@TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world avatar

I’m impressed it stayed together that long. Unfortunately, most people get a partner and settle down, which sucks if you don’t. You can’t stop them from entering that new phase, which is painful if it means you no longer have a place in their lives.

Finding new people your age sucks because most people who have focused their attention on family and jobs. The one bit of solace you can take is that most people become less happy when they have kids and work more.

AsherahTheEnd,

Well, I’d understand if I wasn’t the only one being left out. The rest of the group hasn’t drifted apart, I meant literally just they have drifted away from me. Only one of them is married and has a child. I’m being left behind, the rest of the friend group is sticking together.

TotallynotJessica,
@TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world avatar

What separates them from you? What changed? Is it you, them, or just some influential members driving this?

AsherahTheEnd,

I don’t know. They just seem disinterested in including me. It’s probably my fault.

TotallynotJessica,
@TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world avatar

Perhaps, but it probably doesn’t matter at this point. For whatever reason, they’re drifting away and you don’t know how to stop it. Blaming yourself doesn’t help if you don’t know what you even did wrong. Guessing wouldn’t be helpful, as your guess could be incorrect and create even more problems from you trying to solve it. Unless it’s something you can change, beating yourself up about something isn’t helpful.

Entropywins,

We appreciate you conforming to lemmy standards…welcome friend

recklessengagement,

Felt. This is why I prefer spending time with people 1 on 1 anyway

gndagreborn,
@gndagreborn@lemmy.world avatar

Honestly, fuckem. You are your own sun. You don’t revolve around their hierarchy. You will find your people if you search for them :). Godspeed.

AsherahTheEnd,

My severe social anxiety makes it nearly impossible to make new friends. My current friend group is literally all from elementary school still and they’re drifting away from me. But it’ll be okay eventually. Thank you

Draegur,

glad you made it to lemmy

i won’t hold my breath but i still hope you will feel better

AsherahTheEnd,

Thank you. I just need my outlet, I had a small break down after my account was banned because I literally have no one to talk to except randos on the internet. But it’ll be okay, this place seems to be active which was a relief.

Draegur,

All my nearest, dearest loved ones of the past twenty years used to be randos on the internet :D

i’d like to think that you’ll find a ton of people who are into the same stuff you are and they’ll become your found-family just like it turned out for me

funnystuff97,

If that ain’t the truth. Moved across the state to find work, and obviously my old buddies can’t invite me to as many things anymore. But seeing them all on a call together playing video games without even a heads up hurts a smidge.

AsherahTheEnd,

Yeah to does hurt. I’m sorry. :( They’ve just been kinda drifting away from me. I try to make plans to play games online or to meet up and 3/4ths of the time I’m ignored, or the plans are cancelled. Yet they always play games online together without me. It’s just frustrating. I feel so lonely and my severe social anxiety makes it impossible for me to make new friends. I’m pretty lost tbh.

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