I understand the breakdown but the brainworms are still really present even in this comment. So I’m gonna rant a little.
The issue “hon culture” and the term “hon” in general is that it others non passing trans women.
TTTT has such a huge self hating obsession with non passing, that they elevate it and create something that doesn’t really exist outside their twisted world view.
The irony is that many of them do pass, they just have a horriblly mysogynistic view of women that they directed inwardly at themselves. Cis women don’t really get to chose the woman they get to be either and many if not most would fail those standards.
The term toxic positivity and hugboxing is also largely misunderstood. Everytime I’ve seen it it’s just TTTT people complaining that they can’t spread their bile, or that they didn’t get the masochistic hit of self hatred. People being overly supportive is not nearly as toxic as the alternative.
I understand why you feel the way you do. I’m probably one of those toxicly positive people you are taking about, but I still feel the same kind of dysphoria and self hatred too.
But I also know I don’t have to let that same hated control me or my actions. And I know I would never direct it towards or even enable it in my trans siblings.