Smorty,

Ok, but what if the guy respects the women and her decisions. What if he has seen her without makeup, and thinks that she is beautiful either way. How would one tell a woman that, without it being oppressive? I genuinely want to know, as I don’t see that as being evil. Please tell me if I’m wrong on that.

morphballganon,

The following answers are for talking to your partner. Adjust for friend/date/acquaintance.

You just tell her she’s gorgeous. No need to make a comparison.

If she asks if she looks better with or without, tell her that you know when she has makeup on, it means she put in effort, and effort is sexy (that is true, and it doesn’t contradict your opinion, and it’s a compliment).

Also, you can’t go wrong with picking whichever aspect of the makeup looks best and telling her she nailed it.

be_excellent_to_each_other,
be_excellent_to_each_other avatar

I have to admit there's a dimension to this I don't get. I absolutely agree that whatever makeup you choose to apply is your business and no one else's. But every single woman in my life, from my mother, to girlfriends, cousins, platonic friends, and my wife has expressed their opinion to me (often disapprovingly) at one time or another about my decisions with regard to my clothing, facial hair, regular hair, etc. I feel very sure this is an experience many other men have also had. It annoys me, but I don't see it as an issue in my life.

What makes this any different?

VoxAdActa,
VoxAdActa avatar

What makes this any different?

Other than the fact that you seem to have amassed quite an impressively above-average number of hypercontrolling women in your life?

be_excellent_to_each_other,
be_excellent_to_each_other avatar

Eh, I'm in my 50s, it's not like I had all these experiences in six months. :-)

VoxAdActa,
VoxAdActa avatar

Oh, ok.

So, see, in that case, the difference is, all that happened over 50 years or so for you.

For a lot of women, all that happens before lunch.

be_excellent_to_each_other,
be_excellent_to_each_other avatar

Thanks, I'd already received a less snarky sounding answer though.

VoxAdActa,
VoxAdActa avatar

Good, I'm glad to see that there are still people who are patient with the clearly bad-faith troll-baiting posts of other people.

be_excellent_to_each_other,
be_excellent_to_each_other avatar

Yes, my post history screams bad-faith troll-baiting. I've no idea how I pissed in your cheerios, but really I thought this sort of thing was being mostly left behind at reddit.

MemeCollector,
MemeCollector avatar

What makes this any different?

Systemic oppression

be_excellent_to_each_other,
be_excellent_to_each_other avatar

Alright - that's 100% a reasonable and true answer. Thanks! :-)

morphballganon,

Mothers telling their sons how to dress should not factor into how equals talk to each other.

Most of the phenomenon you describe that I’ve seen came from teenagers. My wife is an emotionally aware 30-something, so she knows better.

Also, if you straight-up look like a slob, that’s not gender-specific like the comic. Comic guy has never been a woman, doesn’t know why comic gal wears makeup, and yet he feels like his opinion should matter (it shouldn’t).

TheThirdStrike,

This is literally the plot of every Disney movie lately. Just as entertaining too.

drdiemz,
drdiemz avatar

What's the joke here?

MemeCollector,
MemeCollector avatar

You, maybe?

morphballganon,

The guy’s a loser? Ha ha?

stephfinitely,
stephfinitely avatar

And than if you don't wear make up you are told you would look better if you tried a little make make up. Damed if you do, damed if you don't.

Norgur,

That's the thing the "It's just my opinion man" crowd hasn't gotten yet (with a few exceptions): If you are allowed to speak out whatever "opinion" crosses the two braincells in your skull when they aren't occupied with keeping you from falling over, so is everyone else.

db0,
@db0@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

We need a witchesVSpatriachy community here as well

sweeny,

Absolutely, I’ve been seeing so much casual sexism on here. Maybe it has something to do with the aging techie demographic sites like this naturally attract, I see it in the programmer communities a lot

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