Exploring the dark depths of manipulation to protect yourself (www.youtube.com)
Hey everyone,...
"I'd rather adjust my life to your absence than adjust my boundaries to your disrespect"
I heard this quote recently and it really resonated with me. I went no contact with my family 3 years ago and I have enough distance now that I’ve grown around the pain enough to be less destabilized when I miss them. But even though I miss them and struggle to fully understand that feeling sometimes, I know that if I were to...
Anyone out there need a hug from a fellow human person?
Have one from me today!
anybody else realize decades later you can't tell whether people like you or are just pretending?
I think in my case this is a combination of 2 factors: having very self-absorbed parents (I would classify one as non-N and one as N) who really just didn’t give a crap about my interests or inner life most of the time, plus one symptom of my being on the spectrum is that one very specific input wire is pulled and I have...
If you go NC and your Ns file you as missing, you're doing it right.
A while ago Ns gave me a farewell email i think. I don’t read their emails, but the header looked like that and I accidentally read part of the header. I didn’t reply....
Don’t speak about self at all, grey rock. Don’t say any thoughts or opinions. Don’t help out the N at all, if they desperately need help, call ems.
clearly state your case once and then leave it at that. If the narcissist doesn’t accept it and persists, walk away
Is aang's (avatar) approach with koh the face stealer a good approach for us to use with our Ns? (yewtu.be)
Why does someone who believes you’ve wrecked their life and finds you endlessly disappointing want to stay in a relationship with you?
Why are we arguing with someone who’s determined to see you as the cause of everything that’s wrong in their life?
Do flying monkeys ever try to do anything besides reconnect you to abuse?
X will reach out due to being concerned. X wastes a lot of time pretending to not be 100% on Nparent’s side, then tells me to go back to them for more abuse.
Grey Rock Role Play - Narcissistic Mother - Wedding (www.youtube.com)
Possibly The Worst Reason To Have Kids
When I was a little kid my mother (passive agressive bipolar narcissist) opened her heart to me. Keep in mind, I am her first of two children with different fathers and she wasn’t married. She told me how she never felt loved by her parents, siblings, or the men in her life. She said she thought by having a baby she would get...
Crazy Ngrandma scheme to control grand daughter. Tldr: don't believe N's lies about how they will financial help you.
Sandy (Ngrandma) declares that the next time her grandchildren come over she’s going to reiterate the house rules, point out the two rules plaques she already has up, and put up another ten. The other members cheer her on. Much later, her granddaughter chooses a university she would need to drive to, instead of getting a ride...
Passive aggressive note Nfam stuck to fridge for me. (lemmy.ml)
Nfam got together and spent 2+ hrs complaining about me and discussing whether they will evict me late at night. But not to me, to each other. They made sure they were yelling about it through the entire house, so i heard them. For context i’m disabled. Next day they left this note on the fridge:
If you're an estranged adult child and you're looking for a way to get your parents to hear what the problem is, I'm sorry, but you have your answer already. They don't want to know.
They may be incapable of knowing. There are no magic words that will penetrate their defenses....
Will our Ns actually kill us?
I’ve been paying attention over the years and have seen a slow escalation of aggression by the Ns. It just dawned on me that if this keeps going up, they might actually kill me, like stab me to death....
Is my plan reasonable? Tell them nothing about where I'm going out. Say errands, calls, or praying outside church.
What should I do/say if they press for “what errands”?...
Has anyone ever had an abusive leftwing narcissist in their life?
Just wondering. My Nparents liked trump the moment he said ‘muslims bad’
Watching my family plan a surprise birthday for my brother… on my birthday.
Just needed a space to vent a bit. I’m currently sitting here (I should be napping while my baby sleeps) watching messages roll by in a private family chat planning a surprise birthday for my brother. On my birthday....
Does anyone else find not making eye contact with negative people to be helpful?
I get drained if I spend too much time with someone negative. With less eye contact, I hold up better it seems.
There a multiple levels of Ns.
I was housed recently. Lost my place and my Npartner. Had to move back in with Nparents. Npartner was bad, but Nparents are a whole other level of bad. I was in jail for 1 day. Nparents are comparably bad as the jail. The jail didn’t allow me to use my prescription meds and confined me. Npartner was more about the silence...
N's don't ask question about your behavior? Only rhetorical questions?
They’d asked ‘why didn’t you do that?’ I’d explain, then get in even more trouble for explaining. I thought they wanted an answer? Am i suppose to just say nothing?
GC losing GC status?
GC has, apparently, for the past few yrs, been LC with Nparents. Including LC when with them in person. GC recommended Ndad gets a therapist and he has. Therapist told Ndad that his family sucks from the sounds of it, and he announced to me today that GC seems awfully rude. I’ve never heard him say anything negative about GC....
Glossary
#Acronyms and RBN Terminology#...