Cheesing it up
SomeGuy69, I like to imagin its one big cheese cave secretly connecting the whole country, every store and the US collectively decided to always just pick a cheese out of it and close the door, while someone fills it back up by pushing more cheese into it from the other side.
rasakaf679, Wait there isn’t a single rat inside the mines?
LemmyKnowsBest, There are no single rats. They’re all married.
ATDA, Can I apply to be a government cheese handler? Chilling in caves all day, cool, comfortable, snacks…
I mean yeah you’ll need to download your music and Netflix for the day but I’m willing if the pay is right.
gravitas_deficiency, Honestly, I’m surprised we’re not on NCD already.
Gork, I will fight to defend the United States Strategic Cheese Reserve to my dying breath 🧀
AllNewTypeFace, 
Which Adam Curtis documentary is this from?
TempermentalAnomaly, And how is this just like that small rebel group in Ecuador?
psycho_driver, Cheesegate.
TempermentalAnomaly, Bad security. Just chew right through that.
dditty, Their security is full of holes
Uranium3006, 
We should stop subsiding dairy. In fact we should release all the cheese all at once to counter greedflation
Track_Shovel, This is the plot of one of the malazan books
ShouldIHaveFun, In Switzerland we have the tradition that for every kg of gold stored in a bank, we have to keep an equal value of cheese in the vault.
Altofaltception, Meanwhile Canada has a strategic reserve of maple syrup.
ILikeBoobies, Really just Quebec
Both are there to pay farmers for more than the country needs
Track_Shovel, You shut up about that right now. it’s a national secret. What do you think we do with those abandoned wells?
Moose, 
We had to tighten up security after the great maple syrup heist.
milicent_bystandr, Adjusted for inflation, the heist was the most valuable in Canadian history until the 2023 Toronto Pearson International Airport heist
Did they steal an airport in 2023?
milicent_bystandr, Also, does that qualify them to be called the Sticky Bandits? More professional than Marv and Harry at any rate.
ShadowCatEXE, 
It’s actually having to be used, since production of our sweet glory oil has been low.
peteypete420, Sweet Glory Oil, o my god that is hilarious.
aeronmelon, Honestly, the idea that America has a network of cheese caves makes the country a little bit more awesome.
Track_Shovel, The best part is that dealing with old mines is a big issue (socially, land use wise, and environmentally). Re-purposing them as cheese caves has me howling.
wildbus8979, It ain’t sliding down easy if it ain’t cheesy!
cypherpunks, 
wildbus8979, QMSP/FPAQ isn’t government owned though.
PrimeMinisterKeyes, Thank you so much for this. The Wikipedia rabbit hole it opened up led me to the fact that “vintage” originally meant “wine harvest”.
JasonDJ, late Middle English: alteration (influenced by vintner) of earlier vendage, from Old French vendange, from Latin vindemia (from vinum ‘wine’ + demere ‘remove’).
Interesting. It makes a lot of sense now, knowing that.
ajmaxwell, 
The government created stuffed crust pizza
Track_Shovel, THANKS OBAMA!
awwwyissss, When the zombies start taking over I’m grabbing wine and crackers and setting up my base in the Cheese Cave.
JoShmoe, Com’on you know there’s already a team camping at every entrance, waiting where you can’t see them.
awwwyissss, They won’t keep me from my snacks.
dditty, They can’t stop all of us
Infynis, 
They should let people in. Sell the cheese like apples at a pick your own apple orchard
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