HEXN3T, 
“Uh, I don’t know how to say this, but [4th-wall-breaking spoiler]”
HEXN3T, Spoiler alert: >!He dies.!<
violetraven, 
“What? They always hold it when I pee”
AlgonquinHawk, I just shat my pants.
TastyWheat, “So… I can bring another guy, right?”
MrMcGasion, Ratchet when Clank makes a bad pun.
BmeBenji, “Do you have anything gluten free?”
jollyrogue, “I can’t eat ice cream.”
FartsWithAnAccent, 
"Did you just fart?"
Erasmus, 
For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, “That’s a hell of an act. What do you call it?”*
And the father says, “The Aristocrats!”*
bjoern_tantau, 
“No, the Dreamworks face looks more like”
Snailpope, I just got back from the doctor…you’re gunna want to get tested…
Deestan, That’s NOT how Bitcoin works. Listen-
Lath, "Hisss... Even I wouldn't eat that!"
getoffthedrugsdude, That wasn’t silent…
Clent, Sharted
tenchiken, “lube up first honey.”
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