It seems like you’re aiming for an unobtainable goal, namely being perfectly in harmony with everyone at all times.
No you have misread me, I am aiming to survive and to do that I have to manage the social relationships around me. When my boss gets extremely upset at me for fucking up something silly and stupid up for no reason I have to manage that relationship to keep my job.
I do absolutellyyyy overthink things but it is way off the mark to suggest this is all just an obsession with ruminating over things I can’t control, the point is how I say sorry is sometimes the only thing I truly do have control over.
I want to keep my job and the only proactive thing I can do is say sorry. In order to do that I have to think about these things.