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CalciumDeficiency, to asklemmy in My (20F) colleague (60sF) is a workplace bully, what do I do?

Her best friendship with the manager, mainly

CalciumDeficiency, to asklemmy in My (20F) colleague (60sF) is a workplace bully, what do I do?

Honestly, I work really hard, and any of my colleagues would vouch for it, but I assure you she’s constantly complaining about me and others since I get pulled aside for what I feel are very unreasonable complaints which only she would notice (on a busy closing shift I forgot to restock the milk in the fridge near the coffee machine once, the milk was literally in the second fridge in the kitchen and would have taken her 3 seconds to restock herself, instead she immediately complains. Even though openers are in half an hour before open and restocking is supposed to be an as you notice it thing, it isn’t specific to closing duties)

CalciumDeficiency, to asklemmy in My (20F) colleague (60sF) is a workplace bully, what do I do?

She always eats pieces of halloumi cheese off of the salads, which is also an expensive ingredient, while enforcing the ban on staff meals so no one can ask for theirs before she leaves. Super hypocritical because she will do what she wants when it suits her like eat the stock but if she sees anyone asking the chef for food or eating kitchen food without paying she goes directly to management. Meanwhile the chef knows how much food we have and there’s always waste (they refuse to order less) and the staff meals come out to pennies so it’s just an annoying situation where we have to sneak around her while also biting our tongue about her behaviour

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in Will I ever be seen as truly British?

Definitely relate to not quite fitting in with either culture! I’m grateful for the perspective my heritage has given me on national identity and how I view different customs as a whole, because I think it has made me more understanding of others. But I definitely feel most understood myself when with other people who are dual identity, no matter what those identities are - there are definitely common threads we all share, from trying to fit in and camouflage to the dissonance we feel when considering what it would be like to move back to our country of origin

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in Will I ever be seen as truly British?

This is genius

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in Will I ever be seen as truly British?

I am a woman, but other than that bang on

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in Will I ever be seen as truly British?

Bloody expensive though

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in Will I ever be seen as truly British?

Maybe because they’re both island nations with an isolationist culture, but there are definitely parallels to be drawn between the treatment foreigners get in the UK and in Japan. Growing up, being Polish was the identity others assigned to me and how they identified me and the main way in which I was described, and people make a lot of assumptions about me based on it. I used to get asked if I was Jewish a lot growing up because I have pretty stereotypically Slavic features, for example, and one time a teacher described me as “sallow skinned” after seeing I have an ethnic name on the school register.

CalciumDeficiency, to asklemmy in My (20F) colleague (60sF) is a workplace bully, what do I do?

It’s awful. She calls me “flower” and refers to workers she can boss about as “good girls” yet pretends she’s the only one who actually works in the place. Wow I needed that vent

Honestly not sure how I’d be able to prove anything so far as reporting goes

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in How do people actually dumpster dive to get free food? Are there any other cheap/free ways like this to get food?

Unfortunately I have neither anywhere near me, and no car to travel, but good to know. I was reliant on my food bank for a while but the COL crisis means they limit the amount of aid each person can claim which sucks

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in [Serious] Why do so many people seem to hate veganism?

I would be totally fine with them drawing their lines wherever if they let other people do the same, but many vegans will take the stance that consuming animal products or meat is always wrong, and never justified, no matter what. Many vegans actually would disagree that it is justified to eat animal products if a doctor recommended it, they’d say there are no nutrients found within those products which can’t be found in plants. They’d also be against eating gifted non-vegan food, many are against feeding cats a nonvegan diet too

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in [Serious] Why do so many people seem to hate veganism?

Found it interesting to discover that the money here in the UK is made from animal parts - I think certain notes contain tallow? Definitely seems like it is impossible to fully exclude animal products from your daily life unless you go off the grid and try to be an entirely self sufficient vegan homesteader, which, while extremely difficult and likely dangerous is still an option open to those preaching a vegan lifestyle. Vegans often do not actually practise their philosophy as far as is practical and possible, they all draw the line somewhere so far as how willing they are to sacrifice their comfort and convenience. Like there are no fully vegan cars - the glue is animal based, even if you opt out of a leather interior. Public transport or taking a job you can walk to are alternatives in the UK if you actually cared about benefitting from animals as little as possible, but few vegans will make sacrifices which are actually inconvenient once you get down to the nitty gritty

Imo being a vegan so far as diet and basic lifestyle changes goes is fairly easy for some people (they don’t really like meat to begin with, know how to cook and enjoy it, no real health issues, disposable income) but the real test of how much they actually believe in these ideas is in if they consistently give up more niche forms of animal exploitation wherever they can

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in [Serious] Why do so many people seem to hate veganism?

Maybe so. I typically will provide something like falafel/bhaji/spiced chickpeas with hummus in a wrap, but in situations I’ve helped with event planning for, there has always been a significant proportion of the party who are either religious vegetarians or have other dietary restrictions. If veganism isn’t as common where you are, you wouldn’t think about it I suppose

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in [Serious] Why do so many people seem to hate veganism?

That’s interesting, I suppose meat being so culturally important would definitely make substitutes feel essential, and if they’re so much more expensive veganism can quickly feel like a privileged stance

CalciumDeficiency, to nostupidquestions in [Serious] Why do so many people seem to hate veganism?

I can see why not having vegan options at gatherings is frustrating, tbh. For the same reason not having halal or kosher options is also frustrating if you are going to invite guests with those restrictions. Providing a decent vegan option is easy and nonvegans can also eat it, plus you can easily make it a catch-all option for gf folk as well. I wouldn’t throw a fuss about it, or post about it online, but I always try to make sure there’s a vegan option when bringing snacks in for the kids at school for example (I’m a highschool teacher) so everyone can participate

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