thetorontoharold.com

Air Canada Introduces New “Vomit Free” Seating Class For Additional $50 | The Toronto Harold [satire] (www.thetorontoharold.com)

Mississauga - Following last week’s incident where an Air Canada passenger was forced to sit on a vomit covered seat, the air line says they’ve taken steps to ensure that won’t happen again as long as flyers are willing pay. The airline has introduced a new seating tier called “Vomit Free”, that wi

The TTC Is Replacing Queen Streetcars With Stagecoaches And Some Residents Are Not Happy | The Toronto Harold [satire] (www.thetorontoharold.com)

Toronto - Due to ongoing construction as part of the new Ontoronto Line, streetcar service on Queen Street will be halted. And unfortunately due to various other streetcar replacement services, there will be no available buses to service Queen and the TTC will be using replacement stagecoaches. The

"A Green Belt? Folks, I Don't Even Own A Black One" Ford Decrees In Sweatpants | The Toronto Harold [satire] (www.thetorontoharold.com)

By Connor O’Brien Queen’s Park - A lackadaisically looking Ontario Premier Doug Ford arrived at a press conference this afternoon while rubbing the sleep from his eyes, attempting to shift blame of his appearance on Sears, deeming "I'm disappointed in the selection we have to put up with now

City Replaces ‘Drinking In Park’ Signs With Guy Who Loves To Explain By-Laws To You | The Toronto Harold [satire] (www.thetorontoharold.com)

Toronto - After backlash from residents and city councillors over the large signs outlining new rules regarding drinking in parks, the city has decided to remove the signs and replace them with dozens of men who will be more than happy to explain the rules to you. The men will be deployed to the en

Ontario: The Future Is Electric, And That’s Why We Have To Do All Of Our Polluting Right Now | The Toronto Harold [satire] (www.thetorontoharold.com)

By Noa Garmaise Toronto - By now, most Ontarians have seen the province’s hot new ad campaign—the slogan “The Future is Electric” is plastered on TV commercials, phone pop-ups, and street-side billboards. Despite the generally positive response the ad blitz has received, the Ford government wishe

“No Frills” Rebrands Itself As Just “No” | The Toronto Harold [satire] (www.thetorontoharold.com)

Toronto - The Canadian grocery chain, which touts itself as the affordable alternative for shoppers under the Loblaws umbrella, has announced a rebrand for the company by dropping the “Frills” and simply going as “No.” Loblaws says the move was prompted by a shift in the market due to inflation,

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