Leilys

@Leilys@lemmy.dbzer0.com

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Leilys,

Unfortunately, after several discord purges, they seem to be gone now…

But, if you search up liberashop, you’ll at least be able to add it to tinfoil and get access to downloads again. It’s really sad what’s happened to Teknik and other preservationists on the switch scene.

Leilys,

Thanks for the encouragement. I’ve been put on performance for a while at work and despite my best efforts the situation isn’t improving. I’ve only got a few more weeks before basically guaranteed termination.

I definitely did have a moment recently where I found a mistake in something I made a point to go through with a fine tooth comb when I did it, and I was so horribly disappointed in myself I wanted to cry and resign because I tried so damned hard, but I still screwed it up.

And you are right about gaining experience and starting afresh. I hope that as I go along I’ll just gain more experience and be better at my job until I can work and meet expectations, like the average neurotypical person.

Leilys,

Hm, it feels like I’m always expecting the other shoe to drop, for the inevitable collapse to happen. I’m always scared of that, and so far, despite best efforts, it’s been true.

I usually reach a point where I’m struggling to deliver even a “reasonable” workload in possibly some form of burnout, and then mistakes happen, and bosses start to side eye me. My lack of ability to notice detail at times also doesn’t help, even if I do double back to check.

But I’m still early in my career, so I am learning, developing new coping skills and moving on to do better (I hope).

Leilys,

On hindsight, I do feel a bit silly about being so upset over a job. I left my previous because the workload escalated to too much, but in the current I was trying to stay, but I’ve made mistakes that have impacted business, according to my boss. I really liked the culture, but I think the writing is on the wall now.

In my performance management document, it was just hard to read about the “obvious lack of care” and “lack of proactivity and initiative”. I feel like I’m always struggling to keep my work in a row, to where I’m just tired and don’t have the energy to really ideate or something.

I’ve been started on some non-stimulants, but the psychiatrist said it might take a while to take effect. I’ll probably be more diligent on following up there as well to try and get myself together a bit more. I also do go to the gym about once a week.

It’s hard sometimes to see things not work out/fall apart, and the main common denominator is yourself.

Leilys,

This exact thing has bitten me so many times!!

I’ll open an email, maybe not pick up on the need to action (especially if multiple people are required to action on things), and then my boss gets to hear about my lack of follow up.

I’ve tried to keep a list, like I’m working on individual work tickets which has helped, but even then I still miss a couple of items.

Leilys,

Unfortunately, I’m not in the US and there are exactly 0 protections against ADHD, so me getting canned for underperformance, even if it’s associated to ADHD is fully legal. But I still appreciate your input here.

Leilys,

I’m sort of on my last legs at this current job due to an accumulation of mistakes that could be attributed to ADHD behaviour. I hate using it as an excuse, but it colors so much of my behaviour. I don’t ever mean to make mistakes, and so much of them at that…

I have disclosed up my diagnosis to my boss to really try and improve my performance and work within my actual ability, and wrote my boss an email asking for accommodations. The follow up call was basically “You need to focus to do your job here” and “I understand you have been diagnosed, but this should not hinder your ability to do your job”.

I’ve been asked to submit my request for accommodations in writing, so it’s not like they’re completely against it. But I don’t trust that they actually understand the impact ADHD has always had on my ability to perform consistently at work and will be understanding of any missteps, even though I am trying to actively prove that I’m trying with medication and coping mechanisms.

I do have upsides. I work very well in crisis and urgent situations, though the sustained elevated stress leaves much to be desired.

Leilys,

I’ll take that, brother.

Leilys,

I appreciate it. I have inattentive type ADHD (also, I think ADD is now nested under the ADHD umbrella), based on what I’ve experienced so far.

I’m not sure where I fall on the severity scale, to be honest. On one hand, I made it out of education with a 2nd upper class degree in humanities.

On the other, I can’t drive long distances (1h+) unsupervised and unmedicated because there’s a significant risk that I’ll just shut down in the driver’s seat and crash my car, even if I’m smacking my face and trying everything to maintain wakefulness. I can’t help it, and thankfully so far it’s only happened when I’ve been able to pull over and swap drivers or rest.

Leilys,

Take some of the questionnaires from more legitimate ADHD resource sites. Where I scored highly likely to be ADHD, my partner did not at all.

That being said, you could also undergo psychiatric assessment with a psychiatrist, but it may be a little expensive. I would recommend it if you can, because medication and appropriate psychotherapy can greatly improve quality of life.

Leilys,

“Just do it”

Well, I’m trying, but my brain decided I should spend the next 3 hours doomscrolling while I mentally kick myself for not doing the thing already.

I think with adulthood there’s been more things I can “just do”, but the smaller things usually get procrastinated to hell and back for no reason besides “my brain didn’t want to do it”.

Same with potential, whatever greatness I was promised by everyone who said that hasn’t happened yet.

Leilys,

I think it’s definitely really early to say if they have proper romantic interest in you, given you’ve only known each other about a week? But from your post, it seems like you two have points in common and have a lot to chat about, which is often a good foundation for relationships, friendly and romantic.

In terms of learning Linux, it’s probably ideal to have a bit more of an outline of what you want to start teaching her because it’s a huge jump into a new OS (not that I know much of myself). She may not know where to ask you to start and would appreciate more suggestions from you on where to begin, like telling her “Today, let me show you (practically) how to install (OS) on a system and navigate it” and going off that.

I think the tl;dr would be: Have a Linux lesson plan, expect friendship first. Take it slow.

Hope things go well.

Leilys,

Granted, it would be rather dumb to be going online with anything pirated on the switch, but dual booting is a pretty fair way of going about it if you already own games/ want online options. Just takes extra memory in the SD card.

Definitely recommend it.

Leilys, (edited )

Thanks for sharing it here!

I joined the discord but it was axed before I could save information. Lesson learned, I’ll make sure to take screenshots in the future.

Leilys,

I think it’s definitely come from some trauma of being heavily neglected in ways I desperately needed growing up. I credit my friends, including the ones I’ve mentioned here for being the support I’ve needed to survive at first, and now do well.

I don’t know how you would feel, but I would love to have returned the favour of that level of trust and support, and I endeavour to do that, best I can. It did hurt to find out that they sat on it for so long to avoid a potential scenario, that it came true anyway due to a different kind of hurt.

I told Xavier following the initial conversation: “I’ll always be your friend. That doesn’t change, and I’ll always support you.” And based on a very recent chat I think he does believe that and is willing to try to get past this.

My feelings of hurt were never going to end in me cutting them off. But they’ve just extended a sort of olive branch, and we can work with that. I feel a little reassured now that my friendship is worth at least some effort, because it has always been a deep fear that I wasn’t.

Leilys,

It’s sort of an everyone kind of knows but me thing, since I chose to drop the topic and ignore the signs after they said nothing was up out of respect to them. I know they owe me nothing of the sort, just that in the end, here we were. I’m just coming to terms with it.

Leilys,

I actually bought one for my collection. Takes a lot of tweaking, which I think is what detracts a lot of people, but it’s not bad hardware at all.

Leilys,

Currently jailbreak is possible if you have firmware 9.0.0 and below, to my understanding. You can look up videos, but most people recommend text guides as they are easier to update and keep current. For PS4 it matters less since nothing has changed since the current jailbreak released.

Leilys,

Have you ever found that game where it plays well, mechanics are solid and the art is also up your alley. But at the end of each round you play you just see the little battle pass section trying to prey on your sense of FOMO, trying to scrape out just a little more, even though the price tag upfront is already a bit higher than what you’d normally pay for a game in the same vein.

I found a game I probably could’ve genuinely enjoyed for a long time. I was talking it up to my friends to buy it on release together so we could play co-op. The demo was really great.

For it to come with a Day 1 battle pass (plus online only access when it had singleplayer modes) makes the developer’s intent very clear: we want more money, and we’ll use every FOMO trick in the book to achieve it. And once you pay, you still have to work for those rewards you paid for.

Cosmetic DLCs are fine. I play a fair bit of DST and I enjoy collecting twitch drops and free skins, and if I wanted to support the Devs more I could buy a pack. That’s upfront and transparent. I don’t get reminded every time I build a chest that “There’s 16 more skins you can unlock for this item”. That would be scummy.

Leilys,

It’s when they keep getting shoved in your face unnecessarily, I think. Games like DST do it well imo - there’s free skins for just playing the game, or timed drops, and you can buy a pack to support the developers if you’d like.

Paying for a pass so your sessions in a game gives you “bonus” rewards is kind of crappy. You didn’t do any additional quests, but because you paid money you now gain more cosmetics, or double the exp. But…for a paid game? That’s F2P level monetisation. It shouldn’t have a place in a game where you’ve paid upfront, you know? And for every rewards screen to go “You could ALSO have earned xxx” to remind you that you should buy it, that’s scummy.

Leilys,

It’s truly disappointing. I was already primed to buy Inkbound with my friends on release to play multiplayer for the most part since trying the demo, but having zero offline function when singleplayer was playable put me off + higher than expected pricing, and the nail in the coffin was the day one pass.

Now that they’ve reworked the name of their pass (not sure about the changes to its mechanics, but I doubt I will check properly) to the “leveling pass” and made offline a beta feature (which, again, should’ve been day one), it’s too little too late. It was a very promising game, but I can’t objectively say the pros outweigh the cons in this product I wanted to buy.

Leilys,

And I haven’t. And yes, it’s Don’t Starve Together. I find Klei’s games to be quite good, though I am slightly cautious about future developments since there is some financial investment from Tencent now, but they’ve held firm to their principles so far.

No comments on the mobile version of Don’t Starve. Iirc that was developed because of Tencent’s acquisition/investment and I keep away from most mobile games due to microtransactions anyway.

Leilys,

I majored in communications because I was so burnt down after secondary school that it was more a process of elimination - I couldn’t do everything from A to Y, so that only left Z. But I would’ve liked to go into something to do with computers.

My father’s a software developer too, and seeing my neurotypical younger brother following in his footsteps now is a bittersweet experience. He gets a lot more attention from our dad, and I feel like he’s the white sheep of the family, where I’m the black sheep for not being able to do well in life

I don’t know if I’ll ever retrain to pursue that career, but I’m in my mid 20s and there’s time if I’d like to. Right now I have a stable career, and I’m working towards life milestones one day at a time.

Leilys,

You don’t need to disclose the diagnosis to your employer as long as you’re not seeking any accomodations. I’ve personally withheld my diagnosis from my boss since there’s no need for accomodations beyond my medication.

I used to have a very hard time staying awake in meetings that didn’t involve me directly, and medication has been a lifesaver. There will be people who insist you never had a problem before, etc, but I’d encourage you to just ignore them and do what’s in your best interest. You know yourself best.

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