I currently make an urgently needed clean slate regarding my browser tabs - and so read for the 100s time the Wiki article on #masking. And it just came to me as a flash insight [the German word Geistesblitz is a thing in English, right?]: Masking could be compared to Emotional Labor https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emotional_labor ! I learned about the underlying psychological strategies + concepts during my 2nd studies, also about advice on how to survive it sanely. Maybe this could be a support for @actuallyautistic?
@rebekka_m@actuallyautistic of course it is emotional labor. That#s why it is so akin to female masking (being nice, pretty and plyable and fulfilling other peoples needs) or the kind of masking that black people do in order to get along in a racist society. It is the kind of labor the the less powerful part in any given constellation has to give to the status part. Children are being taught by authoritarian parents the same thing. Be the person I want you to be. The person that fits my expectations.
@samid@actuallyautistic and by reading your comment I come to the conclusion that autistic masking is in fact even WORSE than emotional labour:
Emotional labour was/is researched "for" and with NTs that tend to e.g. show smiles when happy and so can think of previous happiness to conjure the appropriate behavior/smile/whatever when "in professional need"... And that is the thing we autistics can't do ["properly"]. 😑 So I wouldn't toot the above again...
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