A question to my fellow autistics / Actually Autistics, have you ever felt embarrassed about something? And do you understand what it means?
Some context.
I'm trying to think of an experience where I felt embarrassed, but I can't think of one. The way I understood embarrassment is you felt ashamed about something. Believe it or not, I don't remember feeling ashamed at all.
For example, there was a time when I slipped when I stepped on the sidewalk. The reason I slipped was because I was looking around trying to find where my crush was hiding (we were waiting to be let in at school for our turn in quarterly major exams).
I understand that it's supposed to be an embarrassing moment. My crush saw me that day, she told me after we started dating (it became a teasing moment, and a constant reminder she was turned-off that day LOL). Frankly, even to this day I can't help but laugh at it whenever I recall it.
But, to feel ashamed of it, I did not feel anything at all other than the pain of crashing into the concrete.
I mean, I just accepted it for what it is, I slipped because I wasn't paying attention where I was stepping, and that's that. I even laughed at myself (and as I've said earlier, still laugh at it to this day). It's my own foolishness to begin with (and oh, you are free to laugh, too, since I'm laughing at myself. :P )
And speaking of laughing… I never minded when people laughed at my expense. I didn't even think of getting angry, or reporting them, or retaliating negatively. If I can think of a comeback, not revenge, I do, otherwise I take it in stride. I am not saying I don't take offence, but I don't react the same way I've observed most people do.
Is that just me? Or, is that something observable with many?
