INTEGRITY COMMISSIONER (noun): A person lacking in integrity who is commissioned to detect lack of integrity in others with the objective of whitewashing it. A perk paid by the public in dollars and frustration.
LIBERTARIAN (noun) Political persuasion with a limitless, almost childish faith in individual capabilities. Previous philosophical leaning of a person who became a socialist upon being unable to cover her medical bills (also see AYN RAND)
RELIEF (noun) The ability to breathe again after the elephant you brought home lifts off your chest and goes for a walk. Usually brief lived sensation that ends when the elephant invites itself back and brings some friends along.