When I talk to myself, sometimes I call myself my dead name, or my gender I don’t associate myself with. I am self-aware enough to know I’ve associated myself as male and [name] for thirty-seven years, but it annoys me I haven’t made that connection in my brain somewhere that yes, I’m a girl, my name is Eshe. I feel it...
It’s been little over a week lol. I kinda know I’m jumping the gun a bit, I just want my brain to get on to the same page that I just wanna be me, dammit.
I’ve been out for a week-ish. I chose it a few days ago. Again, I’m self-aware enough to know to give it some time, I guess I was just wondering if it goes away.
Well, for starters, id probably come clean about starting hormones to your SO. Honesty being the best policy aside, they could help you look out for mood swings and stuff you may not notice on your own.
You did handle it well with your kid. Sometimes they get lazy and just reach for the nearest thing to do their chores, cuz they just wanna get it over with. You know how it is, we were both kids once, and I’ve got three little assholes of my own to deal with, lol. They mean well. They tried to get the chores done, after all, instead of neglecting it.
Like you told me, just take it one day, one hour, one minute at a time if you have to. Take some time to evaluate your emotions, and see if it’s worth the energy you are putting into it. I’m glad you recognized it as a mistake, instead of maliciousness. Good luck and Godspeed on your journey. o7
She wanted to see me on her lunch break. I was nervous. I warned her I would be in girlmode, and, to be honest, ladies, I don’t think I have a boymode any more....
I hope your mother has done some growth since then. Sometimes, it might just be better to let go. Just, be careful and temper your expectations, and have your partner by your side.
Trust me, I’ve been super worried about this day. She bucked when one of my kids came out as pan, and again when they came out as trans, to the point they call her her name, not grandma. Even to her face. Because they have been slighted so much. I know she doesn’t understand, but she’s trying. She even was trying to correct herself when she called me son, and I gently told her I’m still making my own connection in my head. I’m glad it went as well as it did, and I’m sorry your stepmom wasnt as accepting. Trust me, I’m still worried about my stepdad. He’s been very stoic about this, but he’s got a more important things going on than his trans stepdaughter. (His mom isn’t doing very well). So imma give him his space on that
Oh, I don’t wonder. I’ve never been more sure. I’ve ditched all my old clothes, and have been wearing leggings and tank tops the entire time. Since coming out to my family, I’m less nervous to go out. I’ve even felt comfortable enough to use the women’s room!
I did a thought experiment with my son yesterday while playing GTA with him, and redid my character as my transition goals, not some gross charicature of what I think I’ll look like (how they have a hundred hair styles and they all suck idk. Maybe it’s just my potato computer) It was so enthralling, and he redid his character with his goals. I didn’t know I wanted tattoos and ear piercings 😳 and when I got into my favorite car, woo. I want to wear booty shorts and crop tops, and am so looking forward to when I feel more comfortable to wear it.
My son is trying to take a bit better care of himself since he tasted euphoria. I’ve started taking better care of myself since I’ve started my journey. Brushing my teeth more, shaving daily(someone said the other day, having the right goals is a great motivator), caring more about my hair, my presentation. I just thought I needed to put on clothes and look semi decent. Now I care about my appearance. I care if I wear ratty clothes now.
It’s just, if you made a Venn Diagram of a year ago me objectively describing physical attributes I found hot in a woman, and my transition goals, I think it would just be a circle. I want long blonde hair, sky blue nails, not afraid to show off her body. I keep calling it sluttiness, but, it’s probably just confidence. Confidence is sexy after all. Confidence in myself and my body, to think I’m hot shit. Not in a condescending way, mind you. I’ve been talked down to enough to know how it feels.
Yeah, but it would be weird in a few years when I start dating again for my kids to meet a different date of the week, if I brought any one home. Idk. It’s waaaaaay to early to even think about that. I don’t even think I’ve started to grieve properly. I kinda think I’m happier, in a way, that she’s gone.
Since my last post I got my HRT 4 days earlier than I expected. Based on my last post you probably might’ve expected me to hem and haw about it. Myself I was gonna wait until the middle of the week for my first dose, but I couldn’t contain myself. I took my first dose as soon as I could, like literally. I felt great the next...
Thank you, love. I’m so happy for you, and I hope my appointment goes as well soon. I love for you your love is so into you, and I am glad you are seeing some body positivity. I found a bit earlier, and was gushing to the kids about my ideal body and they were so into it. Thank you for your uplifting message
Hi, I’m gonna reintroduce myself, first. I went by VirulentAura, and have been kinda active this past week posting, if anyone actually cares. I decided to change it up, cuz I was tired of lemmy.world being down, and, I dunno, I wanted to use my name. Preface aside, please be advised that the content may be troubling to some....
She says she only told her dad and sister today she was leaving me because I wanted to be a girl, and she’s not into girls. She’s just aggressively straight, and right now she is leaning heavily into the aggressive. To the point where she bought a plane ticket for tomorrow, leaving me fucked on rent. How the fuck she could do that to her own children, I don’t know, but it’s the last straw for me. Hate me as much as you want, but don’t fuck with my kids.
We are. I don’t think she would try to hurt me, and she’s staying somewhere else, my mom’s I think. That aside, I don’t think she has the spare keys. It’s only a hundred bucks shy or so, but I’m renting from a Corp, so… I’ll go donate plasma or something. I’m not on any hormones yet, so should be a cinch.
Funny, one day at a time… It’s what my mom always says.
The (ex?) wife forced my hand today. She threatened to out me to my family, so while I was at the hospital pith my youngest cuz he was vomiting coffee grounds from stress, I did a big group message with both my brothers (one I came out to already), my dad, my mom, and her (so she couldn’t accuse me of saying anything untoward).
Laid it all out. That I have an appointment with my GP on the seventh. That I wanted bottom surgery (cuz she said in the group “why don’t you tell them you want boobs and you wanna turn your penis inside out?!”). That I hated my body hair, and have been happily wearing women’s clothes for a week.
Dad was surprisingly happy for me.
Mom, unsurprisingly, called me selfish (??) And suggest one of the kids go with the wife, one stays with me, and one lives with her (??!!?!).
Hadn’t heard from my youngest brother, but he’s a conspiracy theory nutcase, sooo…
Course, mom wanted me to call her about an hour ago, but I’m not having any of that. Especially since she keeps calling me son. Dad was respectful enough to ask what to call me.
I don’t get her. Why does someone who said they loved me, wish me so much hate just because I want to be myself?
Genuinely, I am so sorry your interactions with your parents make my mom seem supportive. She asked me why I couldn’t wait a couple of years to come out, so the kids could be out of the house, and, to reiterate, said I was selfish.
My dad was the supportive one.
I love the positivity you are wishing on me, and I agree. I’ve been known to make things worse with my overhelping. And she doesn’t want anything from me anyways. You’re right, I have to worry about my babies, I have to worry about myself. She’s a strong woman. She can figure herself out.
Is it normal to misgender yourself?
When I talk to myself, sometimes I call myself my dead name, or my gender I don’t associate myself with. I am self-aware enough to know I’ve associated myself as male and [name] for thirty-seven years, but it annoys me I haven’t made that connection in my brain somewhere that yes, I’m a girl, my name is Eshe. I feel it...
It’s been a rollercoaster of a day
It’s the night before I take my next E shot and all day it’s been hard for me to regulate my emotions, but is such a wide gamut of emotions....
I saw my mom today
She wanted to see me on her lunch break. I was nervous. I warned her I would be in girlmode, and, to be honest, ladies, I don’t think I have a boymode any more....
18+ I need image help.
I feel the need to say beforehand, I’m slightly drunk right now, and my inhibitions are lowered by this, but this has been bothering me lately....
Late night HRT euphoria
Since my last post I got my HRT 4 days earlier than I expected. Based on my last post you probably might’ve expected me to hem and haw about it. Myself I was gonna wait until the middle of the week for my first dose, but I couldn’t contain myself. I took my first dose as soon as I could, like literally. I felt great the next...
it's collapsing (tw: relationships, dysphoria)
Hi, I’m gonna reintroduce myself, first. I went by VirulentAura, and have been kinda active this past week posting, if anyone actually cares. I decided to change it up, cuz I was tired of lemmy.world being down, and, I dunno, I wanted to use my name. Preface aside, please be advised that the content may be troubling to some....
Classic puzzle, new approach or just a "two kinds of people" moment? (ttrpg.network)