twll

twll, 5 months ago

@Ninji Aaaaa. This was my gateway to furry… in 1996? turns to dust with an echo of modem noises

twll, 6 months ago

@patterfloof I went looking for this image for someone who hadn’t seen it.

twll, 6 months ago

@patterfloof This has been rattling around my head for days because of you.

twll, 6 months ago

Some things I said out loud yesterday:
“Oh! You’re a little meat vacuum, aren’t you?”
“Am I undermining your authority with this tone of voice? Yes I am, ohh yes I am!”
“Food is an interesting vortex of delight!”

twll, 6 months ago

Some things I said out loud today:
“Numbers have no meaning here in the void between countries.”
“You have powdery trousers.”
“A fart dipped in paint.”
“Put that in your chocolate disc player.”

twll, 6 months ago

Some things I said out loud today:
“I am a gentle paste.”
“I shall karate chop your bum.”
“It’s the synthesiser police!”
“The secret saxophonist is here with a message.”
“Ah, Dr. Toilet! We meet again!”
“Secondhand salt.”
“Please… it’s orange.”

twll, 6 months ago

Some things I have said out loud today:
“I’m a sad little bumblebee.”
“It was a medicinal biccie!”
“J’ai voomy-voomy!”
“Suck the drink from its mouth.”
“That ambulance is full of strippers.”
“If she’s ever untethered, she’ll float across the land smiling inanely at people.”
“Good, British teeth.”
“You can’t fault them for trying, but you can fault them for what they’ve done.”
“1% of our coffee is sourced by orphans we stole.”

twll, 6 months ago

Not so many today, but that’s probably because I’ve been very busy:
“High visibility tassels.”
“Sneaky product wizards.”
“Ooh, you did a big boy sale.”
“You’re my new favourite sycophant.”

twll, 6 months ago

Some things I said out loud today:
“Spatchcock cat.”
“Murder, murder, murder… run away!”
“The horrible world of marketing.”
“Oh look, it’s luxury coffins again.”
“Why not be vomit instead?”
“The nose dildo.”

twll, 6 months ago

Some things I have said out loud today:
(To the tune of the Transformers theme) “Cucumbers: courgettes in disguise.”
“I need to have a bit more of that velveteen sleep please.”
“A caterpillar of white ooze.”
“It weed overnight!”
“Non-plastic breakfast.”
“I’ve been doing hard admin.”
“The industrial cottager!”

twll, 6 months ago

Some things I have said out loud in the past two days:
“It is now safe to turn off your hospital.”
“I’m just a blob of human flesh.”
“It’s never a good idea to be known to senior management.”
“It’s breakfast, Jim, but not as we know it.”
“He’s got something of the theatre about him.”
“A gluten javelin.”
“Candy floss or insulation?”

twll, 5 months ago

Some more things I’ve said out loud in the past few days:
“A luxury poo.”
“Huff the bed chemicals.”
“Help! Help! I haven’t sent an email!”
“You stupid cantaloupe!”
“I have been outmanoeuvred.”
“Retirement or Switzerland?”
“The problem of ‘The Refrigerator’.”

twll, 5 months ago

Some things I’ve said out loud today:
“She’s got the Kryptonite!”
“Everyone knows the upper class flirt using balloons.”
“It’s time for ‘Counting With Sales’.”
“I think you’ll find that’s a premium hole in the ground.”
“Let’s not play ‘Hide the Access Point’. It’s quite uncomfortable and you get very bad signal.”

twll, 5 months ago

Today’s batch of utterances:
“Never go in the cupboard.”
“Drop your pants to say you love me.”
“Oh we are so French!”
“Shovel more coal, boy!”
“She’s eating bugs again! No, not your mum.”
“Waffle-faced a child.”
“Spicy mechanic.”
“Barratt Homes in space!”

twll, 5 months ago

A few things I said out loud today:
“And thus begins the procession of the Royal Irritant.”
“Lubricate your turkey.”
“Luxury bread.”
“I think you’ll find he prefers to be called ‘Handsome Michael’.”
“A delectable supply of bugs.”
“The incredible twirling lady.”
“Custard strike team.”
“Explosives for every occasion.”
“There’s an awful lot of bananas happening in Norway tonight.”

twll, 5 months ago

Please enjoy some madness that I said out loud today:
“Hydraulic dog.”
“Hahaha, I’m driving a shrub!”
“Gesturing with a chaise longue.”
“Drugs are always the answer.”
“Nuclear nipple.”
“He’s summoning Cotton-Eyed Joe.”

twll, 5 months ago

It’s been a few days, but I managed to write down some of the madness I spoke:
“You’re eating carbohydrates with no lubricant.”
“Fuck you and your stupid parsnips.”
“A journey of sadness.”
“Friendly neighbourhood Spider-Maidens.”
“A fleshy dribble.”
“Optional sticky trousers.”
“All of my tits are in a funny place now.”

twll, 5 months ago

Let’s bring in the new year with another dose of stupid shit I’ve said out loud:
“Oh no! Does she need throwing to a hospital?!”
“It looks like someone dropped their breasts onto a photocopier.”
“An icing bag of coffee.”
“The bacon flute.”
“That’s refreshing down my bum crack.”
“Sneaky tartare sauce.”
“Ketchup launch vehicle.”
“The Love Fart.”
“I thought my arse wax would be more popular.”
“Make the plectrum of hate appear!”

twll, 5 months ago

Just a few new ones for you, but I actually said these things out loud:
“My headset has anxiety.”
“Fleshy knowledge blobs.”
“A handy shuffle.”
“Mashed potatoes and singing.”
“I never get nurses admiring my juicy veins.”

twll, 5 months ago

Here we go again. Things I said out loud recently:
“The headlight police.”
“It couldn’t have been more Pet Shop Boysish even if the Pet Shop Boys had sung it.”
“We’ve got a handbag emergency!”
“The digital chicken noise.”
“Are they feisty otters?”
“National Express of the sky!”
“I shall take him a pair of spoons.”
“A drawer full of feet.”