@RickiTarr Pondering as I read all the replies, all so personal and various. For me, “the big thing” is knowing that there are people who can help but refuse to help or only if they get to abuse me me for needing help. (cough family cough).
I cope by putting up strong boundaries and acknowledging the hurt of abandonment. Then moving on (again) and building a good life.
RickiTarr