Lumelore

Lumelore, 5 months ago

Teal line really should be going to at least Duluth (city at the western point of lake Superior). It’s so weird that it stops at the twin cities. I’m guessing the person who made this map doesn’t know much about Minnesota.

Lumelore, 4 months ago

Went there just now and did not get a pop up. Firefox does not detect any trackers. https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/467885421292945408/1198699114943238155/IMG_20240121_124113096.jpg?ex=65bfda8b&is=65ad658b&hm=66a27e7466a0f1bc05241bee5d63accb778aac97fcf10b83b877f621ca69db85&

Lumelore, 4 months ago

When I was younger I always played all my games as a boy, but in every single one I hated the way my character looked. The few times I did play as a girl I really liked it. I’m also astonished at myself for not realizing sooner lol.

Lumelore, 4 months ago

Also me: a girl

As far as I am aware, it is because lemmy has no flairs, and this makes it easier to look for memes with a specific audience.

Lumelore, 4 months ago

It’s just a meme I made like 3 or 4 years ago because I saw a skin on pmc with a funny name. I really didn’t put that much effort into it. This has a CW for assuming the viewer is transfem because I am transfem and it’s from my perspective when I was an egg. Also I don’t think this meme at all invalidates gender non-conforming people who identify as male. Just because it was intended for a different audience, it doesn’t mean they don’t exist or are invalid. Would making a meme like this targeting gender non-conforming people who identify as male invalidate trans women?

I think what they mean is that trying to argue that a person playing a girl character makes them a girl, regardless of their identity is the part they don’t agree with.

I agree with your statement, playing as a girl character is not what makes you irl a girl. However, this meme isn’t about the character you play as. It’s about the amusing title that the Minecraft skin has, and it’s not a skin I made, so I didn’t choose the title.

It invalidates them because it’s in a sense saying that their actions make the way they identify invalid, that’s what saying someone is trans in-denial does, it invalidates their current identity based on their actions

You do realize that is egg_irl, right? This whole community is about being trans in-denial.

and also kinda reinforces gender stereotypes

I feel like this meme does the exact opposite. Top text essentially says “On the surface I’m a guy” and bottom text essentially says “but actually I’m a girl”. At least to me that doesn’t seem cisnormative.

Lumelore, 4 months ago

Yeah I get that last part. I had a lot of internalized transphobia at first, and it took me a long time to get rid of most of it. Sometimes it will still crop up when I’m trying to go to sleep which is really annoying.

Lumelore, 4 months ago

That’s like exactly how feel about my old pictures! I was going to put something like that in the post but I couldn’t figure out how to put it into words. :3

Lumelore, 4 months ago

Thanks! If I remember correctly, I made two separate picrews and used ms paint or something to put them in that arrangement lol.

Also, I already deleted some of them, but they were similar to the ones I decided to keep. I think I’m going to make a time capsule for myself with them.

Lumelore, 4 months ago

Something my therapist taught me is to find evidence against my doubt. Sometimes the thought that I am not really a woman and that I should go back to being a guy will pop into my head, and then I remember how happy starting HRT and filing my name change paperwork made me, and it helps that thought go away pretty quickly.

Lumelore, 4 months ago

Yeah dating apps are pretty bad. Try joining a group/club or participate in an event of something that you like such as art, sports, etc. Socialize with the people there and eventually you may get in a relationship with someone. I have many relatives who met each other this way so it seems it works. Also one plus of this method is that you know you both have a shared interest.

Lumelore, 4 months ago

You will always need coping mechanisms. Even when life is going well you can still have bad days. What I did was to find healthy coping mechanisms to use to replace the bad ones. There are many ways to cope and not all the ways work for everyone, so just try them out and see what works. One that I started using very early on was relaxation breathing and another that I started more recently is exercising.

Lumelore, 5 months ago

I had not heard of duck duck goose until I was like 15 and my mind was blown.

Lumelore, 5 months ago

Yeah that’s me right now and it is rough. Now that my dating profile is a few months old literally the only likes I get now is a bot or two about once a week. I honestly think the best way is to join some type of club or group, socialize with people there, and maybe it eventually leads to a relationship.

Lumelore, 4 months ago

Yeah it’s crazy how much your perspective on life and stuff changes for the better after you make the realization. Hormones are going great. It’s really exciting to finally be experiencing it for myself. I did have some mood issues at first but I think they finally stabilized now. Wishing you the best in your transition, there’s a lot of exciting things out there to experience!

Lumelore, 4 months ago

I remember when I first came out to my mom she told me, I believe a fake story, about a trans woman who was ugly and forever alone, and she was of course insinuating that that would be me. However, she did eventually come around though. About 2 years after this she randomly told me that I was a pretty girl and I was like :O. However she was still opposed to me medically transitioning and it took her 2 more years to come around to that.

My only regret that I have is not being out to the world sooner. I wish I could have been a girl in highschool, but I didn’t have much support from my parents then and it was also covid so I had to be at home anyways.

It’s been about 6 months since I started hormones and came out to the world and I am so much happier. I had a lot of apathy towards life previously and I wasn’t living very healthily. Now that I’m on hormones I actually care about myself and I’ve been working out a bunch trying to get myself back into shape. I live in a blue state and overall people have been nice to me, although I do try to avoid people that I think will give me trouble.

For me my most used resource that helped me figure things out were communities like this one. They helped me feel like I was not alone and provided me with a lot of useful information.

Lumelore, 5 months ago

This reminds me of when I wore trans pride socks and my mom thought that they were just regular stripy socks and she said “I used to wear socks like that when I was your age” and my sister and I were so confused lmao.

Lumelore, 5 months ago

Kind of the same for me also, but I couldn’t take the female name they had planned for me since they gave it to my sister. All of my cousins are women on my mom’s side, so my parents were extremely surprised when they found out my sex, since my mom didn’t think it was possible for her to have a boy, but it turned out that she was right all along.

Lumelore, 5 months ago

When I picked out my name, I spent hours looking through lists of names and picked out ones I really liked and put them in a list. My top choices at first were Raina and Amirah, and I tested them out by creating terraria characters with those names. I felt like the letter r didn’t fit with my personality, so I ended up going with Amiah instead. I actually first heard of the name Raina from that one frog girl that was in an old version of Minecraft, and I still really like the name, so if I ever have a daughter that’s what I would name her. So imo it is totally fine to name yourself after something from media.

Lumelore, 5 months ago

Is this from inspirobot?

Lumelore, 5 months ago

Well I just got some new nail polish and painted my nails with trans pride colors and that was fun. I also tried some ghost pepper hot sauce today and that was less fun.

Lumelore, 5 months ago

Congrats! Hopefully it goes well for you.

Lumelore, 5 months ago

No because I have COVID :(.

Lumelore, 5 months ago (edited 5 months ago)

Multiple of these points here do remind me of myself. Before I started questioning my gender many years ago, I felt like I had to be hyper-masculine, although being hyper-masculine made me feel depressed. I think it was because deep down I felt feminine yet society was telling me otherwise so I felt I needed to overcompensate masculinity to cancel out the femininity. I think that if I didn’t have this hyper-masculinity, I would have realized that I am trans a lot sooner.

During this point in my life, I was so depressed I could hardly function. I got put on anti-depresants and I was happy for about 2 months. Then I went back to school in the fall and I started getting depressed again. It was then that I realized that I was envious of women and that it was making me depressed. Not long after that realization I started expirementing with my gender and I noticed that it was making me very happy and that being masculine was making me depressed so that is what led me to conclude that I am trans. Many years later and I am on HRT and I’ve never been happier.

Honestly I think the barrier to you not being able to draw yourself is that you are not ready to accept yourself as potentially being trans. Being trans, especially at first is very scary. There are so many new things to familiarize yourself with and on top of that you have to deal with people potentially being dickheads. Coming out is like taking a leap of faith, and hopefully you have supportive friends and family who will catch you or else you will smash into the ground and have to lift yourself up on your own. However, taking this leap is the best decision I ever made because I am so much happier now. I hope this didn’t discourage you at all, it’s just the reality of it, but I swear you will feel so much euphoria when you finally step out of your comfort zone and draw yourself as a woman. I know I did when I shoddily photoshopped long hair and makeup on me many years ago.

Lumelore, 5 months ago

Right now I take 2 mg in the morning and another 2 mg at night. My estradiol is at 89 pg/mL and my doctor is considering putting me up another 2 mg. I have some mood issues which I made a post about here the other week which is why I am holding off on the dosage increase for now.

Lumelore, 5 months ago

This isn’t necessary but you could get a gaff. I have some from leolines and they are very comfortable and they help alleviate some dysphoria for me. Also I will second the person suggesting exercise. I am doing it myself and it is a very good.