@inlucesco@sfba.social
@inlucesco@sfba.social avatar

inlucesco

@inlucesco@sfba.social

Your friendly San Francisco book, tarot, plant, corvid, cooking, rock/metal, and history nerd. Kidlit literary agent, copywriter, recovering lawyer, forever medieval history major (in my heart, anyway). she/her

Closed to unsolicited literary queries, but I do accept conference queries and industry referrals.

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inlucesco, to random
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I got a (new-to-me) pickup line this weekend that actually made me laugh/groan:

"I'm on the phone with Spotify, complaining that they've got it wrong: it's not showing that you're the hottest single right now."

inlucesco, to random
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It is so surreal to see my own authors on our local indie bookstore's events calendar! (The book is just gorgeous, too. I want to make the endpapers my wallpaper.) Join us in August:

https://www.booksinc.net/event/katherine-kottaras-vanitha-swaminathan-books-inc-laurel-village

inlucesco, to random
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Hello. Please observe my fresh-baked bread:

Cross sections of crusty white bread
A slice of bread with smoked salmon and dill and lemon zest, on a still-floury butcher block

inlucesco, to random
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A man on a dating app just told me how he prefers his steak cooked and asked if I am capable of cooking it that way for him. 🙄

While it's nice that they filter themselves out immediately, I sure do wish they would do something more productive, like step on some Legos or be a target for birds who need to poop.

inlucesco, to random
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The Church of 8 Wheels is doing a goth skate night, and never have my specific interests been so intertwined.

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/goth-skate-1yr-anniversary-tickets-844258930187

inlucesco,
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@stevenray I'm thinking about going! I've been skating with the CO8W group in a few different locations, but not the church. (I'm a good skater but out of practice so new places make me nervous 😂)

inlucesco,
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@stevenray indoors! In an actual church!

inlucesco,
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@stevenray right? I am so tempted!

inlucesco, to random
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I've recently had two men refuse to respect my clear "no," both of whom acknowledged they were crossing a line while they kept doing it. It's like they couldn't conceive that there's an actual autonomous human housed in my body, or worse, it just didn't matter to them. It's so disturbing. And frustrating.

(I naively thought this would stop after I hit a certain age, and I would get to stop being so wary all the time. Guess not.)

inlucesco, to random
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Black Rebel Motorcycle Club needs to tour again, stat. Alternatively, I need a very generous billionaire to provide me with appropriate funding for my important work in the arts.

inlucesco,
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@stevenray yes! They were SO GOOD. 😭

Someday I will charm a rich benefactor, and then the music and publishing worlds had better watch out!

inlucesco, to random
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Spotted on a dating profile today. My immediate reactions, in order:

A) Aww, kitty, I also make that face when I'm on dating apps!
B) IS THE KITTEN NEARBY, TOO?!
C) I wish I could just swipe on cats to meet instead

inlucesco,
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@pootriarch it moved to the Mission, I think, and is even less affordable than before (at least the last time I checked!). 😾

inlucesco,
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@pootriarch finally, an appropriate use for all that empty commercial real estate!

inlucesco,
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@pootriarch I feel that I could run for local office on that platform and win, although there are so many dog people here it might be a bit ruff

inlucesco,
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@pootriarch if dating apps are anything to go by, the dog people are the majority by a loooooong shot.

inlucesco,
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@pootriarch good question! I have theories, but no reliable sample size.

inlucesco, to random
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I don't have a voice today. My throat feels like I've been smoking three packs a day for the last 60 years. Worth it!

inlucesco, to random
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LET'S GO NINERS 👏🏻👏🏻 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

inlucesco,
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I should probably be more clear about the results I want. Niners, I would like you to WIN THIS GAME. Which means you need to actually score some fucking points.

inlucesco, to random
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I had drinks with a friend in Chinatown, then went to another bar in North Beach to read and people watch. But a drunk older lady had other plans for me.

"Oh, you're so beautiful," she said, and I accepted that as drunk lady tribute. That was nice of her.

Then she decided to start trying to hook me up with guys at the bar. "This is my friend Jennie," she announced.

The guy she was targeting looked at me and said, panicked, "I'm Eric and I JUST ENDED AN ENGAGEMENT."

It crossed my mind to say, "Bro, you're like 25 and your hair looks like it could be mined for biofuel, I DON'T WANT YOU." But instead I said cheerfully, "Sorry to hear that! Better than divorce," and went back to law and politics Reddit.

"I don't like that guy for you," said the drunk lady.

"Me either," I agreed. Then I chugged my beer and went home. I don't think she even noticed I left.

inlucesco,
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This was only my second favorite interaction of the week. The best was the online dating guy who, in the course of talking about what we were reading, wanted to know why I had so many author friends. I told him I work in publishing. He doesn't ask any questions.

Side note: I don't say that I'm a literary agent on my profile, because I learned the hard way that men think that's an invitation to pitch you for representation AND boning.

Instead, he proceeds to tell me about his series of children's books (about his dog, who goes around learning lessons. Comp title: Berenstain Bears) that he expects to be published.

"Yeah, the children's market is tough," I say, and give him a few reasons why. He reiterates that his books will be published, and proceeds to explain MY EXACT JOB AND SPECIALTY TO ME. I give him some more neutral comments about kidlit. He tells me he is also writing his memoir, which he expects will also find trad pub success.

I smiled, unmatched, and continued to live peacefully.

inlucesco, to random
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I think Duolingo should give me extra credit for translating KMFDM lyrics

inlucesco,
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@stevenray they are SO good. I was telling my friend that I don't understand why they are coming to SF on a Monday night, and then I realized they probably have a bunch of 20 year old baby goth fans now. 💀

inlucesco,
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@stevenray I AM SO JEALOUS, that was a dream lineup when I was 16 and still in my fake leather pants phase 😂

inlucesco,
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@taphophile das verstehe ich 😉

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