Had a super productive day! Cleaned my apartment, went for a run, listed a ton of things I found in a back alley on FB marketplace, called Mom, and rolled 56 joints, and 10 blunts because a friend gave me 2 large mason jars of weed. I got 2 more private students and paid off a fair amount of my credit card debt.
In the meantime I am feeling the lump in my throat that happens when I’m a month into a relationship. I realized my issue is an avoidant attachment style, and the only way to get through it is being transparent. I’m worried that saying “hey I am feeling huge anxiety about this relationship and where it’s going, and that one of us may fully lose interest soon” will roll into to a breakup, but I’ve learned the anxiety goes when I stop hiding thoughts and feelings. So hope it goes well!