I think we should add the following criteria to instances at the VERY TOP that are recommended to new users:
The instances does not define an allowed list of instances
Downvotes are enabled
NSFW content is allowed
Users can create new communities
...otherwise new users (eg from reddit) are not going to use lemmy because it won't match their expectations.
Personally, I was pretty disenchanted by my experience on lemmy when I first joined. I had to create accounts on like 5 different instances before I found one that worked (that's why I created the comparison table of lemmy instances).
Most new users won't have that perseverance. If, for example, they see there's no downvotes on the "recommended" instance, they'll probably give up and leave lemmy.