I didn’t think I was being an asshole. The questions I asked were genuine, and I think I was pretty neutral with pointing out how OP shares blame in the situation they are in.
And, through all that, i summed it up with how silly this whole situation is - especially when you look at how OP is responding in the thread. This comes across as a “look at me, I did something good, tell me how nice I am” post. Given the rest of the situations context, just ugh.