This is the “buncha bullshit before the recipe” of tech reviews, except the review also has a buncha bullshit mixed in so you cant find the “recipe” of it at a glance. Pass.
I scrolled through almost a fourth of it before I found the meat. He literally started the review by saying his story of buying a vision pro started in the 90s. My eyes couldn’t roll any harder. At least he admits he’s an apple simp. This is a review for apple simps by an apple simp
(Personal annotations between parentheses. Edit: I know this is a long TL;DR, but it is an outrageously long article, especially considering its substance)
Person discovers VR at an arcade as a kid. Loves it.
Person stays tuned, life happens.
Person gets a Facebook Quest when it is out. Uses it daily. Loves it.
Person eventually stops using it. Can’t say why exactly (Spoiler alert: lack of useful software, unpolished UX. Essentially, nothing beyond an awesome tech demo).
Failing to recognize the aforementioned conclusion (cue “spoiler”), person wonders if VR has a “fatal flaw”.
Person states that Apple unveiling new tech is akin to major social and political landmarks (moon landing, JFK assassination, 9/11, …).
Person depicts touch-centric (without proper buttons) interface as revolutionary (Looks to me as if this person never used proper, non budget peripherals[^1] ).
Person briefly strays to other cult-like tech firms and confuses scientific innovation (electric engines are hardly a revolution of this century) with (Tesla’s) marketing.
Person states they were jaded by previous VR experiences, so the Apple Vision Pro (AVP) headset unveiling didn’t wow them.
Person pre-orders one at 3.5k as soon as the pre-orders start anyway.
Cognitive dissonance due to the price, and Apple (religious) marketing kick in, and the person decides this is a life defining moment.
Person goes back home with their newly acquired liability, and informs their spouse that they will be intentionally failing their duties for a week, due to the previous point.
Person presents the product. At least, they don’t hide the battery pack (as Apple did), nor some of the other flaws (FoV, avatars, etc).
Person also adds that the headset takes biometric information from you (iris scan, hard pass from me).
Person finally recognizes that UX is what was lacking all along.
Person also states that the screen and eye tracking is beyond compare (for 3x the price of the Kura Gallium, I sure hope so…)
Person also then recognizes that productivity apps were also missing all along, and that now, VR (magically) doesn’t have any fatal flaw anymore.
Person makes predictions to justify their spending, stating that the number of apps will be multiplied by 1000, the technological improvement will also step up, and the price will (somehow!?) go down (original iPhone was USD 499 to 599, which is USD 750 to USD 900 in 2024 money, and that is lower than the price of the iPhone 15 models, which range from USD 800 to 1000 🙃)
[^1]: I personally hate touch centric interfaces with a passion. IMHO, no one in their right mind, who understands the prevalence of muscle memory/spatial memory, and the consequential importance of haptic feedback, of absolute coordinate systems, and of explicit information presentation, would ever even think touch-centric interfaces for sustained use are a good idea.
and the person decides this is a life defining moment.
Yeah the moment where $3500 were spent for a toy gadget will surely be remebered for a lifetime..
And.. iris scan? I still have to decide if using my fingerprint to unlock my phone is worth it and secure, and they want my IRIS?
It’s all on software, if the software gets better than it will do quite well but right now the software isn’t good enough to justify the hardware price. If they don’t improve that quickly it’s going to die on the vine.
scale. they could only make 200,000 or so of these this batch because of Sony’s displays. When they can make tens of millions of them, the incredible fixed costs dither away. the first one costs billions. the billionth one costs
even apple isn’t usually 600% as expensive as its competition.
The tech itself is cool I can’t lie. That is what is in all the sci fi of modern day. Nobody will use it regularly until what you have to wear is indistinguishable from regular accessories.
if you’re young and sexually available, then yes thats a big factor. if you’re settled down, in a comitted relationship, thats way down the list. i’d rather look nerdy while in a monet lazy river of wizard productivity than looking hawt while left behind in gotham.
Same thought. I don’t really care much about the AR aspects of VR googles. I feel like I can see why people might game in them, etc, but for AR stuff I don’t really get the appeal. I did recently see a walkthrough of how to use and the features of the Apple Vision Pro and I can’t deny, the tech itself is really cool, I was pretty excited seeing the walkthrough. I just don’t really care about the applications of that tech yet.
Yea and even then pass through AR sucks for those use cases. I worked in the industry for a bit and every client always wanted transparent displays because that human face to face connection was way too important to forgo.
Here AR is a push to normalize VR in different settings where you need to pay attention to what’s outside your googles. Even in social ones - that’s why they tried these eyes on the surface. I’m sceptical some would wear them daily while doing chores, but I was also sceptical about people casually talking to their BT airpods on the street.
Yes, and I used one. But in Nokia days it was mostly work related. You didn’t usually stumble upon that many persons talking to air in public. Now writing voice messages and chatting via headset is way more normalised.
Interesting. I see it the other way around and believe it's only AR that'll be a real benefit (once it lasts indefinitely and is tiny or even implanted some time in the future). Pulling out your phone to navigate somewhere is cumbersome, for example.
Sure, but in its current goggle form, I’m probably not gonna do that. I’m more okay wearing goggles by myself to game in, than walk around with goggles to interact with virtual stuff in a real environment. I’m a huge SciFi fan, and I see the potential for the future tech, just not there right now. Still doesn’t make the current iteration any less impressive, the tech inside the apple vision pro and the programming making it all work is extremely impressive to me.
This author writes like an insufferable teenage cryptobro that got a little older and got a degree, but never actually grew up. I guess he’s after a very specific audience though.
Still though, slogging through that prose is slightly more annoying than a feisty chihuahua. Which itself is irritating, because I kinda want to know his actual opinions without having to dig them out of something full of endless paragraphs of his pointless bullshit fluff.
Ugh. Kids, if you write like that, you’re literally what Shakespeare was making fun of like, a bunch of centuries ago, with that whole “brevity is the soul of wit” char. He was viciously mocking you, a dozen-plus generations ago. Just get your point out.
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