Okay. I’m going to try to respond in a way that doesn’t seem like I’m antagonizing you because you put in a great amount of effort in your response.
There are racist people in Vancouver, no doubt. I can only go by my experiences but the man who hired me to fix laptops regularly makes comments about my supposed background and what my people do there. He’s phrasing these jokes in an attempt to aggravate me, or he would have simply asked me about where my parents are from. Fine, ill play along and appease him so I can keep my job.I’m not convinced that he would’ve hired me had I not had a computer repair certification + be one of the few applicants to this position.
People I’ve tried to befriend get so obviously nervous at my mere presence so I don’t bother to go out anymore. These are people my age.
I have to change the way that I walk, make sure that I dress overly formal and be prepared to move in a way that indicates I’m not a threat if someone starts to approach me.
I’ve been involved romantically with a South Asian person before. I can speak Tamil fine enough to follow a conversation and if I really focus then I can even give semi coherent responses but she told me her family loathes black people. This was after meeting her parents and her mother being shocked that I know so much about Sri Lanka. Doesn’t matter lmao.
I hope that my original question makes more sense now. I know there arent any facial surgeons here but ignore the context and focus on what I can change. Theres a combination of facial features that people find the least intimidating. The more black I look --> the more intimidating I look. We can debate why that is but it’s so obviously true that my own mother laments the fact that my nose is too big and my hair is too nappy. Maybe this relationship is worse in Vancouver because of a lack of black ppl and aversion from most asian people. My uncle has bleached his skin to look more attractive, and a good amount of my extended family agrees that the procedure looks good.
So just give me advice on what I can do to change my face. That’s all I’m asking for.