@Alice@beige.party
@Alice@beige.party avatar

Alice

@Alice@beige.party

Mostly one-liners at my own expense

Awkward AF

Midwest to West Coast

Photos on Pixelfed: @Alice

♾️

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Alice, to random
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Bad news: One of my coworkers just followed me on Mastodon.

Good news: My watch is letting me count my panic attack as a workout.

Alice,
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@mculbertson I'm not sure. I mean, my profile pic is an anthropomorphic hotdog, but my banner is several photos of me eating food, so who knows?

Alice,
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@glasspusher I already apologized about the lab incident!

Alice, to random
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I like to live life on the edge by never orgasming.

Alice,
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@amiserabilist @tuban_muzuru That's because we stand on the toilet seat while we pee.

Alice,
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@amiserabilist @tuban_muzuru I 3D printed a little funnel and tube that spirals around my leg like a water slide so I can pee while standing.

Alice,
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Jorsh, to random
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Lol. Just noticed that I've been on beige.party since May 4th of last year. So happy belated one year of madness, me! Why thank you, me!

And all my fellow non-cult fellows! Love you all! Beige bless! :bb:

Alice,
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@Jorsh It's been a good year with you, bud!

Alice, to random
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Where my fellow risk takers at?!?

You know, the kind who like to rawdog their crossword puzzles and Sudokus with a pen.

Alice,
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@chad I didn't say I rawdog my Mastodon posts! I’m not THAT much of a risk taker.

Alice,
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@NickGates @chad I HAD to edit because I wanted people to know that I was a FELLOW risk taker with crossword puzzles and Sudokuzzzz.

Alice, to random
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I’m really bad at guessing the prices of food/products on The Price is Right and I can see myself making it onto the stage and being like "It's one banana, Drew. What could it cost? $10?"

Waitnwallflower, to random
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I learned I missed @Alice 's bday.

Happy belated bday @Alice
🎂

image/gif

Alice,
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@Waitnwallflower Thank you! That is a very accurate rendition of @KevBot's butt!

Alice, to random
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I have always loved the Zoloft mascot and I just googled it and apparently they refer to him as the BLOB so of course that poor little guy is depressed.

Alice,
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"I told you my name is BOB!"

"Yeah, sure, BLOB!"

Alice,
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@noondlyt 😂🤣🏆

Alice,
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@dannotdaniel Poor StrongSad.

Alice, to random
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I was talking to @zachklipp about music and was reminded of this adorable little bit of dancey indiepop by Yumi Zouma.

https://youtu.be/x7Kt_YAQQgM

Alice, to random
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OMG, L'Oreal, no YOU'RE worth it!

(Provided it's no more than $10 with my CVS coupon)

dugglebutt, to random
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Oh man. Steve Albini just died. That sucks absolute balls. Shit.

Alice,
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@dugglebutt What?!? Fuck.

RickiTarr, to random
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What cracks me up is when you go to a restaurant, and they ask if you've been there before, and then they say, "Well, we do things a little different here", and then it's exactly like every other restaurant, but more expensive.

Alice,
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@HunkThunderzone @RickiTarr @sezduck Ew. I’m sorry that happened to you.

Alice, to random
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Disclaimer for anyone who follows my photography account on Pixelfed:

I KNOW about the Golden Ratio with regard to photography, I just don’t CARE about the Golden Ratio with regard to photography.

It's probably an autistic thing, but I find squares and grids to be much more comforting so I’m going to do whatever makes me happy, even if it means breaking the dumb rule of thirds.

If you're okay with that, this is my Pixelfed account: @Alice

Alice,
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@gnate @ItsThatDeafGuy @Alice Yes! @KevBot LOVES the Dutch angle! 😂

Alice,
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@tehabe Now let me tell you all about my nonna's recipe for meatballs. It all started back in 1917 in a countryside town in Sicily...

Alice,
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@wh0sthatd0g @Alice 💗🙌

Alice, (edited ) to random
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Whenever we encounter a photo booth, @KevBot and I will usually try to stop and take some photos to document our day.

As a result, we've ended up with a LOT of photo booth strips, but my favorite is the one in the lower right of this photo where a woman was watching us take photos in the booth and, at the very last second, I asked if she wanted to be in our photo and she jumped in.

Lady, if you're out there, you were a great sport and we remember you fondly.

Alice,
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@zachklipp @KevBot This is super cute! Feel free to reanimate this thread whenever you think of anything I might like!

While we're here, do you like Yumi Zouma? TOPS kind of reminds me of them in the way that they're both a little more dancey.

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