Schnitzel_bub

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago (edited 7 months ago)

I am friendly but there’s no spots open in my spare time, so I end up coming off like a hypocrite. work - super friendly, off work - sorry, but nope.

and it’s jarring but 3 main friends is already hard to do especially since my family is super super fragmented, I’m an introvert and like slow living too. Just 2 visits a week spread equally to mom, dad (separated), 3 friends, granny, aunt. maths says we’ll only meet once a month already. no mate, I think you’re great but diluting my visits any further will make me super absent, and visiting more often makes me tired and absent in an even worse way.

It’s not your fault, I’ve had the good fortune of meeting good friends in life and made the effort to keep them around and the friendships have aged well. that and I was cursed with a dramatic family where nobody gets along. so yea, I know it sounds terribly douchy but it’s neither of us, there’s just no more vacancies.

I’m not gonna tell you all this when we get along at work, because it comes off as aggressive or belittling but what am I supposed to do/say?

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

Well what if you don’t have friend groups, but individual, very close, intimate, old, meaningful friendships?

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

they dressed up pretty thick too, since it can get pretty cold.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

Why is my poop green?

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

it’s been almost a decade for me to “digest” this truth. But to be honest, I don’t even miss or regret it much anymore. I end up cooking, going out, cleaning up or resting instead. and doing those with the same openness to let them absorb me the way games used to,… man, they sure can be enjoyable

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

They will remove encryption from your nuts too.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago (edited 7 months ago)

They’re only checking if our civilization is still at the talking-out-of-our-asses stage.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

Kree!

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

One might not have the balls for it.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

Exactly, we’re pasta point where adding more puns is funny.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

Don’t worry, I already have someone go bring some from the shop. He’s running unusually late though - hope he’s OK.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

I blame mine on the hamsters.

I had to gradually buy about 95 to make it seem plausible but I got there in the end.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

Fart Vandalay.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

Both are funny to me. I didn’t know there’s comedic range to poop-air.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

One could argue if you have those “not playing along” vibes in general on top of the flatulophobia, they might go out of their way to keep them in and seek you out just for extra fun. Behold how the funny stacks:

Fart

undesired fart

undesired stealth fart

undesired stealth fart one cannot really address

undesired stealth fart nobody can really address with a layer of spite and schadenfreude

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

And don’t forget the adrenalin junkies trying to get away with farting on fart karens

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

Your poople.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

Who said murder wasn’t funny?

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

I actually only needed the volumetric farts of about 15 hamsters.

However, I thought it’s not realistic to have them all fart at the same time, so I kept buying more.

Eventually it was a big enough group that it seemed more statistically plausible that 15 of them farted in unison.

I feed them beer and cheese and beans to increase the hypothetical flatulence interval of each hamster.

Also I have found, adding “I don’t know, maybe something startled them and some of them… Went off” helps. I could buy a few more hamsters instead, but times are hard.

Schnitzel_bub, 7 months ago

There he is! Come on, angry mob, let’s all fart on this heathen!