TheBreadmonkey

TheBreadmonkey, 28 minutes ago to random

With everything that's going on around the world, for all of the worldwide problems we need a worldwide solution. What do we need? Mr Worldwide. It's Pitbull. I'm saying we should get Pitbull to fix everything.

TheBreadmonkey, 2 hours ago to random

Real Gone Kid is, unironically, an absolute banger. I guarantee if you give it a listen today it will improve your life.

That's a Ben Guarantee™

TheBreadmonkey, 2 hours ago to random

Someone's sat outside my house in their car absolutely booming out Paul Youngs Love of the Common People and I really respect that. You go, brother. Live your life. Be free.

Paul Young and his 80s chums looking all 1980s-esque. I didn't watch the video but it's all soft light and hairspray and scenes from the streets of Hammersmith.

TheBreadmonkey, 3 hours ago to random

"It's just business" they say, draining the remaining blood from your withered corpse, as they watch the light in your eyes go out

TheBreadmonkey, 4 hours ago to random

America: let's elect a man with a tiny penis who paints himself orange, can't count, constantly commits crimes and is clearly an imbecile

TheBreadmonkey, 5 hours ago to random

It's quite funny to me that the country's national state sponsored radio openly acknowledged daily that virtually everyone in the country is desperately unhappy at the moment and even runs features on how we might be able to artificially increase our happiness, even in the face of it all. Why has it been normalised for a whole country to be sad. If you were looking at it from a biological/ecological viewpoint you would say that system is malfunctioning, you'd then look for what was making it sick and fix it. Instead we're listening to the virus tell us what to do. Like a warped game of 'Simon Says', only Simon is an utter bastard.

TheBreadmonkey, 15 hours ago to random

Literally spent my whole night watching Bobby Fingers

TheBreadmonkey, 17 hours ago to random

Just ate some tomatoes as a snack like an absolute psychopath

TheBreadmonkey, 17 hours ago to random

Watching Sugar. It's a bit dry, but I think I like it. Very Sam Spade-esque. It's cliché-heavy but somehow carries it off.

TheBreadmonkey, 17 hours ago to random

WOOOOAAAAAAOOOOOH, YOUR GREGGS IS ON FIIIIIIRE

(sausage roll)

TheBreadmonkey, 18 hours ago to random

My wife (ma waf) is such a nerd. Aswell as giving her leavers presents and motivational postcards saying they're all stars, she's made a load of star biscuits and has bagged them up with ribbon and a little badge for each kid that says 'I ♥️ Psychology'.

TheBreadmonkey, 18 hours ago to random

Remember Kings of Leon? Sex on fire? What were that all about?

TheBreadmonkey, 18 hours ago to random

There's nothing quite like driving a bit too fast (in a safe, controlled way, not in a builtup area) with the music up way too loud. I imagine that's how the vikings probably felt going into battle.

TheBreadmonkey, 22 hours ago to random

Inside you there are two Mel Gibsons

TheBreadmonkey, 1 day ago to random

I cannot believe that throughout Mastodon noone yet has mentioned Khan in this whole RFK brainworm news cycle

Khan from Wrath of Khan. An old angry space hippy with forceps - he gonna put worms in your brain

TheBreadmonkey, 1 day ago to random

The only thing that can stop Bad Bunny is a good bunny

TheBreadmonkey, 1 day ago to random

Love is a warm toilet seat

TheBreadmonkey, 1 day ago to random

Do you think there's ever been a sort of collective agreement in the history of humanity where most people have thought - yep, we're living through such a great period right now ?

I mean - 2012 felt pretty good to me. The Olympics. David Cameron left his daughter in the pub. Savile was outed. Malala survived a shooting. The Conservatives hadn't built up to full steam yet. That guy did a big jump from space. We had Gangnam Style. And that old woman ruined then hilariously repainted that Jesus fresco. That felt like a good year. Although Bieber and fucking Mumford and Sons were still going strong.

Skepticat, 2 days ago to random

One thing the metgala reminds me every year is that I have no idea who is famous anymore.