TIL why those with autism avoid eye contact; an overactive subcortical system, combined with an imbalance in the excitatory and inhibitory systems, can make eye contact feel like 'burning'

VasyaSovari, 9 months ago

there's also the base physiological fact that there are two eyes, and you can't look at both at the same time. This results in either choosing one eye (awkward) of flickering between the (eye-strain tastic). Both are terrible options.
Instead I look over the whole face so I can attempt (really badly) to parse feeling & intention. This often results in making comments like 'You have amazing ears' or 'that lipstick is perfect' in the middle of otherwise entirely mundane conversations.

Lunyan, 10 months ago

I don't know if I would describe it for myself as 'burning'. Making eye contact to me feels overly intimate in a way that feels uncomfortable with people I'm not close to

bionicjoey, 10 months ago

For me (am ASD) it always feels a bit overstimulating. A bit like staring at the sun. Or even more, like trying to do complex math in your head while also maintaining a conversation with someone. I am bound to lose my train of thought while keeping eye contact. I have to break it away to actually use my brain

lemonflavoured, 10 months ago

It doesn't feel like burning to me. But it does feel deeply odd.

keeb420, 10 months ago

is that what that is?

technologicalcaveman, 10 months ago

Making eye contact with people gives me the same feeling as looking at the sun, but mentally.

bloopernova, 10 months ago

I had to work hard from an early age to make eye contact because I’d get disciplined if I didn’t.

Funny that now I work remotely, I don’t have to make eye contact at all.

hariette, 10 months ago

It’s the best ✨

MichaelScarn, 10 months ago

Am I autistic?

youCanCallMeDragon, 10 months ago

Do you like trains and aquariums more than people? Do you have a special interest that drives you to memorize mountains of information. Do you act on the same code of ethics whether or not you’re being observed? Do you have a system for wearing socks? If so, you might just be one of us.

LegendofDragoon, 10 months ago

Do you often think to yourself "if I stare at their glabella or nasion I can have all the social benefits of direct eye contact without making myself uncomfortable."?

ganksy, 10 months ago

By “system for wearing your socks” do you mean something like never wearing specific pairs because they might bring bad juju?

youCanCallMeDragon, 10 months ago

No. Like the procedure for selecting and putting on socks or anything like that neurotypicals would never think about.