usualsuspect191, "Busier than a three-peckered goat
DillyDaily, Australia has some good ones too.
Are you busy? “flat out like a lizard drinking”
Should we start? “I’m not here to fuck spiders”
"going off like a gumtree on a gas line " was a common saying in our school, but I’m not sure how wide spread that one is, referring to how damn flammable they are.
I also love that “a bees dick” is a valid unit of measurement on most construction sites.
okamiueru, Are you busy? “flat out like a lizard drinking”
That lizard sounds both extremely busy, and also… not busy at all!
namelivia, Southern Spain is also famous for sayings like these, some that come to my mind that I’ve heard from some friends:
“Hungrier than a snail on a glass” “Has less fat than a goat’s knee” “More leg than a box of shrimps” “This is harder than sweeping the floor upstairs”
echodot, Only like one of those makes any sense.
Why would a snail be more hungry on a glass surface than any other surface? Or for that matter, why is it hard to sweep the upper stories of the building than the ground floor?
namelivia, Yeah, upstairs it means sweeping the staircase upstairs direction
TrueStoryBob, Cajun French is just bad French, but Cajun English is wild sometimes… “Mais, gotta make the groceries, me.”
francisfordpoopola, 
Hornier than a three peckered billy goat.
Busier than a one legged man in a kicking contest.
GratefullyGodless, 
“butt kicking contest” is the way I’ve always heard it said.
RIP_Cheems, 
You have to respect the originality of it, though.
electric_nan, “Smoother than hammered bat shit”
“Slicker’n two eels fuckin in a bucket of snot”
Subverb, I once heard someone say that something was scattered “all over hell and half of Georgia”. I use hat all the time now.
runeko, 
“Flatter than piss on a plate.”
EmperorHenry, 
I see no problems with those “red necks”
I live in a very rural area too.
nifty, (edited ) 
I don’t live in a rural area, and I don’t see a problem with them either!
Edit came up with my own southern saying: some people are sweller than the stomach of a contestant after a pie eating contest :D
Aux, American prudes discovered internet?
Twitches, I don’t think you know what prude means. Judging other people’s cultures as less than theirs would be considered prudish.
Aux, Isn’t it ironic that you have no comprehension of the English language?
Twitches, I see in a battle of wits you only come half prepared.
Aux, There was a battle? Lol. You better get back to school.
jenny_ball, 
this is Lemmy’s finest thread to date
ikidd, 
I like the Newfie sayings: “She’s tighter than a squall of shit through a tin whistle”
Hikermick, My wife’s granny in West Virginia: “I wouldn’t kick him out of bed for eating crackers”
hessenjunge, “I wouldn’t push her/him off the bed” means they’re fuckable in German.
Original: Ich würde sie/ihn nicht von der Bettkante schubsen.
gandalf_der_12te, I also very recommend southern Italian for this. It is comical.
nifty, I remember a phrase someone taught me in college, it basically translates to telling someone to go fuck a donkey
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