“IVF is the thing where the man can’t do the thing and the woman can’t do the thing without the man so then a scientist - very, very smart - makes the thing happen. So - baby. In a test tube maybe. But baby.”
I wish this resulted in at least a few de facto cops getting fired or demoted. But instead of that the LAPD might ask for some insane amount like $50m to “harden computer systems against cybercriminals and cyber-attacks” and then get the money and give it to the firm of somebody’s brother-in-law.
I wonder if Tesla has a unsecured plaintext file somewhere of Cybertruck owners. Or using a cellphone - how long does it take to copy 3,500 list items on paper?
And then he goes into the Lincoln Bedroom for a nighty-night tryst with the First Lady - if you know what I mean.
NSFW / NSFLJill purrs as President Daddy takes out his enormous, prehensile cock— I tried but I couldn’t go there. Too Biden. Too strong. Too much. I could blackout.
“Mr. President… Um… Ah… I strongly suggest you do not wear those shorts to the Almost Summer Get Out the Youth Vote! rally.”
“I know - I know. Some of my aides think it’s not presidential for me to show my bare old legs to America. But the old dogs are like me. They need some sun and I want reach out to the young folks and they show lots of skin. Trust me - I look at them. A lot. Tan. Firm. Young. Soft. Tan. Very tan. The tan girls with their taunt young sweet—”
“We feel your American flag shorts are are not appropriate.”
“I heard all the complaints. But America needs me. She needs me. And I need her. I love America. We all gotta love America. Like we did before. Before. You. know. when? Strom Thurmond as a man… was a man…” he trials off into unintelligibility and gibberish for about 10 seconds. He snaps back “He loved America too!”
“We also feel beyond the flag problem there’s another problem… It’s a delicate problem… I don’t know how to… What I mean—”
“Get to the point. Speak clearly. Out with it. Now.”
"Well… They look like… diapers."
The next day the president goes out in his flag diaper shorts and with literally less than a minute #BidenFlagDiapers has been created. By the end of the hour it’s trending. Within about a week Biden’s poll numbers have fallen 10% and pundits are demanding an immediate reboot to save his dying campaign.
Are these Tesla guys really oblivious to the fact that there are ~3,500 of them driving in their crunks functioning as moving billboards for a Nazi billionaire.
“The kids will get over the end of the Tiktok. I know because I’ve been around…” 𝙿𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎. 𝙰𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚖𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚛𝚎𝚋𝚘𝚘𝚝. “Around…” 𝙿𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎. 𝙰𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚖𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚛𝚎𝚋𝚘𝚘𝚝."Around a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a…"𝙿𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎. 𝚂𝚞𝚌𝚌𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚏𝚞𝚕 𝚛𝚎𝚋𝚘𝚘𝚝. “Around a while.”