@Maven@lemmy.world
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Maven

@Maven@lemmy.world

The most annoying thing about being famous is having to tell everyone how famous you are.

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Maven,
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I’ve been poly for 5ish years now and never had an issue. I’m engaged and I also have an amazing bf. It’s a lot of work but… It’s amazingly worth it when it works. I love my partners so much and I’m glad they have other people around them that can make them as happy as they can be.

Maven,
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Polyamory is not a fetish and is not related to sex at all. People who practice polyamory CAN have sex but that’s not what polyamory is. The people who do poly just to get laid are the ones that fail.

(Source: currently engaged to my fiancé and about to celebrate my 1 year with my bf. Nothing sexual about it… Just a lot of love)

Maven,
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Polyamory is not a fetish

Maven,
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This is a bad post. Polyamory is NOT about sex and it’s NOT a fetish.

It can work extremely well and be extremely loving if done correctly. The problem is, it’s not as easy as people often think it is when trying to idealize it.

Communication is extremely important in every relationship and that only multiplies when you have more than one partner.

If you have a feeling of jealousy… Talk about it…

If you don’t think your partner is spending enough time with you… Talk about it…

If you aren’t enjoying sex with your partner… TALK ABOUT IT!

I’ve been with my fiancé for almost 4 years, my bf and I are celebrating our 1 year next month, and I have a new first date next Wednesday. My fiancé has even been with their nesting partner (who is monogamous) for 8 years now.

This all happened because we have clear ground rules and boundaries as well as active communication.

I’ve never felt more loved than when my fiancé helped me pick out my outfit for my first date with my bf.

I love them both so tremendously and it pisses me off when people tell me that isn’t possible or that all I care about is sex.

Maven,
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Exactly! Sex is completely unrelated to the process as a whole.

It’s gross how often people think that being in love is just to have someone to fuck.

Maven,
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That’s the big thing. Polyamory is a LOT of work and most people don’t want to put that effort in.

It’s also just in general not for everyone. Nothing is for everyone… but I feel like every time I see people online generally talking about polyamory it’s always examples of people who didn’t want to put in the work, doing it poorly.

Just because it isn’t for everyone doesn’t mean it can never work. It’s a lot better for people to be talking about healthy ways to do it so people who would enjoy polyamory can do it correctly the first time.

Maven,
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It’s really awesome that you noticed your own needs and put those first. That’s really awesome and I’m proud of you for doing so.

Maven,
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Exactly my thoughts as well!

Poly is not the reason that you can’t communicate, Steven.

Maven,
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Everything you said here was so good honestly.

I am extremely happy whenever my partners find someone who can help make them as happy as I try to. I want my partners to have the happiest possible life ever and it’s unfair to everyone involved to stop them from being able to get that happiness.

I think something a lot of monogamous people forget when talking about poly is that jealousy is a pretty natural thing to happen… Even in polyamorous relationships.

I’ve felt jealous before in my situation, the difference is that I talked with my partners and found a good solution and set of boundaries that made everyone happy vs trying to control their time and life.

I said this in another comment but the most loved I’ve ever felt was when my fiancé helped me pick out my outfit for my first date with my bf (who I’m also to a year with!!). I also love helping them both with their relationship struggles and life issues and so on. I love them both tremendously.

Maven,
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As with any relationship, you can either decide it’s not worth it to keep bringing up… Or if it matters a lot to you, you can break up.

Sometimes, even with a lot of communication, the relationship just doesn’t work. Not everyone is meant to be. Sometimes your needs are very different from your partner(s) needs and separation is the best way to make you both happier in the long run.

Maven,
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The comic doesn’t mention how MANY plants they can identify… Just that it’s multiple…

“Yes… This is grass alright… And this one? Tree…”

Maybe even hit them with the classic “you can tell it’s an aspin because of the way it is”

Maven,
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My major issue with the death penalty is the very real chance of killing an innocent person. People have been wrongly arrested/convicted significant amount of times for mass murder situations, so while on principle I have no issues with the death penalty in mass murder cases… I can’t support it because of the chance of it being the wrong person.

With billionaires, it’s pretty easy to figure out exactly who is the billionaire out of a group of random people… Very hard to wrongfully convict someone of having over a billion dollars.

Maven,
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There is a ton of spam happening on Twitter where bots will reply to every message with “PUSS IN BIO” to try and get people to click on links in exchange for porn

Maven,
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Thank you for this incredibly interesting yet highly unexpected history lesson. I really enjoy knowing this now.

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