Unixbigot

@Unixbigot@aus.social

I created https://Accelerando.com.au IoT Lab, and I host the Brisbane Internet of Things Interest Group. Hacker. Parent. Scientist. Rantist. Atheist. Roboticist. Treehugger. (he/him¹). was @unixbigot

I design and build custom IoT solutions...fast!

Every day I write a #PowerOnStoryToot over morning coffee, as a self-test of my brain. If you like them, buy me another coffee? https://ko-fi.com/unixbigot

¹ subject to change without notice 🐣

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Unixbigot, to random

Okay, a couple of analgesic martinis and I am about dumb enough to enjoy The Meg 2: The Trench.

Unixbigot,

What, they killed off the Mom before the sequel? Is this a Disney movie!?

Unixbigot,

I am totally here for Chinese content, characters, and dialog. Fucking sick of American culture. (Movie: well enough diversity, have a sub full of yanks)

Unixbigot,

“Water doesn’t compress, if you fill your sinuses you can survive as long as our effects budget”

“Director, I have James Cameron’s lawyer on line three!”

Unixbigot,

Prologue character: “I’m back, bitch!”

Production assistant: “I have Barbara Brocolli’s lawyer on line four!”

Unixbigot,

Budget Danny Trejo: this is my last scene, pass the Scenery Salt pls

Unixbigot,

Budget Ruby Rose: I know i was gonna kill you earlier, but i’ve worked out that if I smooch you i’ll get killed off before the next movie and i so want this

Unixbigot,

Oh look, It’s Checkov’s Box-with-EXPLOSIVES-Stencilled-on-it, I’m sure that won’t be important later.

Unixbigot,

Back to the surface B-plot and it’s time for some intense Louis Vuitton product placement!

Unixbigot,

Corridors filled with convenient stacks of boxes. I’m sure that won’t be a key mechanic in the game. . Meanwhile in the B-plot, comic relief!

Unixbigot,

Return of the Vuitton Bag!

Unixbigot,

And suddenly Budget Sam Jackson is Budget Chris Rock . Wait when did Our Heroes get back to the B-plot. Did I miss a reel? Oh look Budget Danny Trejo is smooching Budget Ruby Rose #2 of, um, three, four? .

Unixbigot,

Oh hey, remember there are sharks in this movie? . Somebody is getting eaten….yep there it goes.

Unixbigot,

Budget Danny Trejo is mad that he only got one smooch with Budget Ruby Rose #2.

Unixbigot,

Oh look, they’re all dead. Again. Or not?

Unixbigot,

BEACH PARTY ON FUN ISLAND . Somebody just unironically said “oh em gee”. Paging shark, shark to the red courtesy buffet!

Unixbigot,

Marriage Proposal. Doomed.

Unixbigot,

Budget Danny Trejo has been boinoing HOW MANY budget Ruby Roses?!

Unixbigot,

Movie: Jurassic Park time!

Production assistant: Director I have The Estate Of Michael Chrichton on line… oh fuck i’ve lost count, CONFERENCE CALL.

Unixbigot,

Cute Kid: how many more moves till i’m old enough to snog Jason Statham, I don’t think I can suspend my disbelief that long!

Unixbigot,

Sidekicks: our contract says at least one of us gets to die now. Sidekick #1 I’ll fight you for it!

Unixbigot,

Louis Vuitton must have paid SO MUCH MONEY for this placement. Oh look, Checkov’s Jetski!

Unixbigot,

He JUMPED THE SHARK. Jason Motherfucking Statham just Jumped The Shark.

Unixbigot,

B Plot: Budget Andy Serkis can’t even manage a fake South African Accent.

  • Marvel Legal Team has joined the chat
Unixbigot,

This movie cannot remember if these sharks are five meters long, or fifty.

Unixbigot,

Sidekick A: I get to die now

Sidekick B: no, I do

Sidekick A: I’ll fight you for it

Cretaceous lizards who can’t remember if they are surface dwellers or bottom dwellers: WhyNotBoth.gif

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