Aw man, sorry you’re going through that. It sounds like you both just really need some space to calm down and process. I also get very snappy/aggro and tend to start fights when I’m anxious. I’ve pushed my partner away during health scares as well (I’m in therapy and always apologize after tho) When I do, it’s never actually about my partner. It’s me feeling anxious, wanting space, feeling guilty about receiving help and wanting to pull away and isolate to deal with my emotions. Don’t take it personally and it’s perfectly normal to snap back at someone when they’re being a bit of an ass. You didn’t do anything wrong. Hopefully your partner just needs some space to calm down.
Also, when you’re both in a good headspace, it may be helpful to ask about why they want their mom to help them instead. He might be subconsciously guilty and not wanting to burden you.
This was only my second year gardening, and first year with my own yard 😤 Everything is in containers. I struggled a lot with figuring out a good place to put containers that got enough sunlight. I was trying to avoid the front yard because I was worried about car exhaust and grossness getting onto veggies, but when I finally...
I’ve been lucky enough to avoid physical limitations so far, but I’ve done a lot of long-term travelling. Are you craving a bike tour specifically, or is part of it wanting to be nomadic/outside/survival mode for awhile? You can always go rubber tramping/dirtbagging with a vehicle, stay at campgrounds and bring a bike with you to go for shorter rides. Hell if you can walk decent and wanna get real rugged, there’s always hitchhiking. I’ve met plenty of haggard old men with injuries and lives full of manual labor and drug abuse who are still getting around. There’s a million ways to travel.
I’m currently at this juncture and trying to decide whether to go back to school and start entirely fresh or to hold out for another year or two to see how things go. The anxiety of what the future may or may not hold is real and I’m just standing here, watching the distances shorten faster and faster while still not...
Yep, I just spent months agonizing over choosing a school program. I think our bodies tell us what we need if we listen. I was set on the “safe” choice, but as the registration deadline got closer I got more and more depressed and wasn’t sure why. I came home one day and just collapsed on my bed and started sobbing because it didn’t feel like “me” and I couldn’t see myself being happy doing that for the rest of my life. But I didn’t even realize how much I didn’t want to do the program until it got so bad I couldn’t control my emotions. I was trying really hard to force myself to be excited about the safe route but I just couldn’t do it. I think our bodies tell us what we need. I was ignoring the twist in the pit of my stomach, ignoring how drained I felt learning the subject, ignoring the subconscious procrastination and lack of focus. I switched my program to what I really wanted to do and p much immediately felt relief. I feel aligned with myself, excited to start classes, feeling good about the job prospects and the types of people I’ll get to be around. I literally feel lighter.
Some other people have made really good comments and suggestions about how to figure out what your gut is telling you. It’s a bit morbid, but I like to pretend I’m old and on my death bed looking back at my life. How would I feel about the decisions I’m making right now? Will I regret not going for the harder thing I want more? Will I be happy to take the safe route? Did I waste my precious time that’s now ending? Etc etc
It feels like every time I find a podcast about security/networking/technology the hosts end up saying some pretty off-color stuff, or I look them up and they also host right wing podcasts. Are there any that are more leftist, hosted by LGBT peeps, or at least not actively bigoted ?
I’m still pretty new into looking, this post was inspired by listening to Self-Hosted and one of the hosts has a “news” podcast and one of the more recent episodes was recommending other creators, which were like Megyn Kelly and right wing people :( There were also a few YouTubers that I tried to get into to learn networking but some of them had rant videos about women and stuff. I maybe could have worded it as also like…not corporate-worshipping codebro type podcasts? If that makes sense. There seems to be a lot of libertarian types in computer networking and I just wanted some recommendations by people who have been listening longer than I have.
Darknet Diaries is great, I think I got a little turned off by how the host and a guest were talking about camgirls on an episode. Like it was framed as the patrons deserved privacy and protection, but not the sex workers. I haven’t listened to the other one but I’ll give it a try!
I’m specifically interested in the overlooked history and perspectives of women, LGBT folks, POC and disabled people in tech though. Ofc not all tech podcasts should be political, I’m just interested in those things and am having trouble finding related media. I’ve stumbled on more right-leaning stuff while browsing Spotify though. I just don’t wanna get jump scared by homophobia.
I’m playing a heavily modded Fallout 4. I got a mod where you can start more like a regular RPG and choose your backstory and where you start, and all of the dialogue relating to Sean has been taken out. It’s great, way more fun. My character is a drunk who washed up on Nordhagen beach and is living with the settlers and killing raiders for them and building them a nice house :)
I just read Cory Doctorow’s article “Let the Platform Burn”. It reminded me of something I’ve been thinking about for some time. Instead of joining yet another social network and recreating yourself, why not create your personal social network object and link it to others via a federation of the personal social network...
I think some of it is, not even being “tech illiterate”, but people are just tired and want to do other things. The average person is coming home from work already exhausted, needs to spend time with their partner or kids, take care of the house, etc etc. I don’t blame anyone for not wanting to tinker with setting up servers and learning to make websites and all the other stuff (I’m still learning it too). It’s a lot, especially if you don’t already have a solid foundation. Anything super complex that requires a lot of setup just isn’t accessible for most people. It’s not a lack of ability, but a lack of time and energy.
I do agree about the elitist attitude though. As much as tech people complain about non-tech people, we need them when we eat the food they grew, or they fix our car, or the plumbing in our house. Someone not caring enough to learn new skills because they’re good with the ones they already have is okay and it doesn’t make someone dumb. That’s why they just want to pay someone else to deal with it. I don’t understand how industrial agricultural machinary works but I still eat because there’s people who do. And that’s okay :)
I love Mad Max: Fury Road. All of the visual storytelling, the world building through costume and vehicle designs, the shot compositions, the colors, the movements, the pacing, the fight choreography, it’s all just chefs kiss. I love the whole post-apocalpyse genre a lot but the worldbuilding in Fury Road is so layered and complex yet subtle. I notice new things every time I watch it.
I do, most of the time. I've always felt creative, I always have thousands of ideas and concepts for anything, be it a drawing, a song or a text of any kind, but regardless of what it is, anytime I sit down and try to make something I hate it, I hate it so deeply it disgusts me and kills any will to continue whatever it is I'm...
I'm glad someone else mentioned that Ira Glass quote, I always go back to it when I feel like this.
It's a normal feeling, and not a reason to not make things. It sounds like you want to make stuff, you have the drive. I know it's hard, and I still have days where I rip up my drawings and cry out of frustration, but I try my best to stay in the mindset of "it's still progress, it's still a step towards getting where I want to be, and I'm proud of myself for trying". Some days I try to focus on the sensations of making things. How much I love using a brush, how cute and clean my desk is, how much I love sitting and thinking with music in the background, how good my candles/incense smells, how lucky I am to have my brain and hands working well. I'm sorry you're feeling this way. But it doesn't mean you're not an artist :>
Just seeking some comfort from internet strangers
Hi lemmy, this situation is kinda private so it seems easier to look for support here than it is to talk about it with most of my irl friends....
How's your garden doing? What did you learn this year?
This was only my second year gardening, and first year with my own yard 😤 Everything is in containers. I struggled a lot with figuring out a good place to put containers that got enough sunlight. I was trying to avoid the front yard because I was worried about car exhaust and grossness getting onto veggies, but when I finally...
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Have you ever been at the junction of a fork in your life's road and not known what to do? How did you get through it?
I’m currently at this juncture and trying to decide whether to go back to school and start entirely fresh or to hold out for another year or two to see how things go. The anxiety of what the future may or may not hold is real and I’m just standing here, watching the distances shorten faster and faster while still not...
Non right-wing tech podcasts?
It feels like every time I find a podcast about security/networking/technology the hosts end up saying some pretty off-color stuff, or I look them up and they also host right wing podcasts. Are there any that are more leftist, hosted by LGBT peeps, or at least not actively bigoted ?
Weekly "What are you playing" Thread || Week of July 9th
Hey all!...
The Last Social Network: Your Own
I just read Cory Doctorow’s article “Let the Platform Burn”. It reminded me of something I’ve been thinking about for some time. Instead of joining yet another social network and recreating yourself, why not create your personal social network object and link it to others via a federation of the personal social network...
Neurodivergent folks, what's your favorite movie?
Such a huge amount of TV, and especially Movies, are geared towards a neurotypical audience....
Do you ever feel like art "art" is not your thing? [Question/Rant I guess]
I do, most of the time. I've always felt creative, I always have thousands of ideas and concepts for anything, be it a drawing, a song or a text of any kind, but regardless of what it is, anytime I sit down and try to make something I hate it, I hate it so deeply it disgusts me and kills any will to continue whatever it is I'm...