@arisummerland@beige.party
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

arisummerland

@arisummerland@beige.party

My biggest question: If we aren’t organized into human society to help everyone, what are we even doing?

#ActuallyAutistic #queer #Kansan from # LFK, Certified Listener Poet, meditation teacher, bodyworker, #typewriter aficionado, #HondaElement fan, Jewish Buddhist Dudeist, dog, cat, and chicken tender.

Buy me a Ko-fi: ko-fi.com/aridee

Слава Україні! 🇺🇦
Protect Trans Lives 🏳️‍⚧️
Free Scotland 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿
Free Palestine 🇵🇸
#noindex
#nobridge

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arisummerland, to random
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

Legit, harpsichords do have basically only one volume: LOUD.

ottaross, to random
@ottaross@mastodon.social avatar

Should I be expecting the Spanish Inquisition?

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@ottaross I don't see any comfy chairs in there...

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

Would half chicken half ducks be called Chucks or Dickens?

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr Chucks! And they'd be so awkward and gangly, these birds.

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

What is your dream road trip? Where would you start? Where would you end up? What stops would you make along the way? It can be short or long, whatever interests you!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr @isotope239 Me too!

Alice, to random
@Alice@beige.party avatar

Throwback to the start of the pandemic when we were all going crazy in lockdown and I ordered a gigantic poster of my husband and our cat.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Alice Alice, this is magical AF. i'm glad you have documentation of it!

RickiTarr, to random
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What is the thing(s) that attracts you to a person romantically or otherwise?

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr For me, apparently it's unmasked neurodivergence.

But nowadays I seek only friends, not romance. Been working to unlearn all the cishet patriarchal BS about "love" that was force-fed to me by the world.

It's a helluva task.

Ilovechai, to actuallyaudhd
@Ilovechai@sciences.social avatar

I don't have the spoons to explain why I feel my neurodivergence is making this worse, but I need feedback or insight from other ND people on a unique experience. This will be a long thread (added in replies) but I'm hopeful there will be a few kind readers who either relate or have something supportive to share.
Here goes:
1/
@actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd


arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Ilovechai @actuallyautistic @actuallyaudhd

I don't go on discord much, but yes. There is this group:

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

Okay, since I'm on laundry today, a little story.

When hubs and I first got married, we were very much enjoying our little Honeymoon Bubble, and we were being lazy as Hell. We didn't do many chores, but the laundry we really let go. We weren't wearing many clothes at home anyway, so why bother. Anyhow, after weeks we finally reached the swimming suit bottoms situation, and decided it was time. It was loads and loads of laundry that needed done, so I had my husband back the trunk of the car up to a window of the house, then he popped the trunk, and I started tossing laundry out of the window into the trunk. We went to the bank, got about $30 bucks in quarters, and found the emptiest laundry mat we could, and did it all in one fell swoop. We folded it all and loaded it back into the car using those wheeled laundry carts. We never let it get that bad again, and decided it was time to be adults, and do regular chores, but it still makes me laugh imagining what the neighbors and the laundry attendant thought.

Feel free to share your own laundry story, if you feel like it, I love hearing people's stories!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr I'm a massage therapist, so daily laundry is essential. I hate to let the massage sheets sit; they can get funky because of the small amount of oil content in the lotion I use.

I won't go to laundromat because I prefer to know what was in the washer before I put my clothes or my work sheets in. I fear picking up nasties going to a public laundromat. I've also had laundromat dryers burn flannel massage sheets!

Earlier this year, some small but expensive part went out on my washer at home. I was unable to do laundry for two whole weeks. I ran through every set of massage sheets I have and almost all of my clothing. It was a particular level of hell.

I ended up squeezing in a few essential loads at my mother's house, 5 miles across town, but her dryer wasn't working, so I hauled semi-dried, spun laundry back to my house to dry. Between us, we had one working set of laundry machines.

It was very clear to me that month that having laundry facilities at home really is a privilege -- and a joy.

I actually like doing laundry and having things fairly well-organized (especially for my work environment). Even folding fitted sheets is fun for me!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr Oh, I did too. When I lived in the mountains in an old hunting a shack, luckily I worked at a place that provided work sheets, so I didn't have to do very much work laundry. But I did a weekly haul of personal laundry over to Nederland or down to Boulder and just sat there reading books. Strangely, it really felt like a simpler time.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr Here's another one, not very cheerful, though: after my dad passed, I realized what a terrible laundry situation he had actually been in. He always held a lot of his cards close to his chest, and never really told me about his major troubles, even though I moved back home specifically to help him have an easier life.

He was living with an absurdly old washing machine, and occasionally he would slip up and hint at what he had to do to keep it going. He had these little rituals of jiggling the knob and turning it off and on again to try to get an entire laundry cycle done. I don't know why he refused to replace the washer.

When we were cleaning out his house, I found a small, sad load of five sets of boxer shorts, nothing more, plastered to the inside of the washing machine, dried, but clean.

I also found an entire tub of old tee shirts and jeans that he had basically abandoned because he couldn't wash large loads at all, only the essentials. I brought these home and had to run them two or three times through the washer before giving them away to Goodwill or keeping them for painting rags.

arisummerland, to Kansas
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

I just went out back and took a photo and I'm pretending that the sky is just a tiny bit purple there toward the bottom. 🤣☹️

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Alice I want to believe! 🛸

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Alice How did you do that? Amazing. ❤️

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Alice Everyone say "ionized molecular nitrogen" ten times fast!

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Alice I will send her the photo and see if she is still up! She's about 5 miles south.

arisummerland, to random
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

Oh gosh. The feels.

My little mommy was up a half hour ago, driving out west in the city, trying to find a place to see the . She said she saw a bunch of people sitting out in lawn chairs, hoping to see it.

We have been vacillating between a 10% chance and a 0% chance of seeing it here for a few hours now. She said, "If you find a place you can see it, let me know, and I'll drive up."

I just realized this: she's going to be 83 years old this year. Her mom died fairly early, I think mid-sixties (I was young) and her dad at 86. She's never seen an aurora, and though we had an 88% eclipse recently, and she had glasses, this is something neither of us has ever seen, pretty much being lifelong plains states folks.

Now I feel like I have to help her see this, somehow, and not just in pictures that I send her from the web.

It may not happen tonight. We have rain in the forecast over the next few days, so even with more CMEs hitting tomorrow, we both might have missed our one chance last night.

It makes me realize just how fragile both life and beauty really are.

My dad (who died in 2021), and I had a plan to drive to see the total eclipse on April 8. Clearly that didn't happen. Mom and I sort of saw the one in 2017, on a cloudy day at a state fishing lake a few dozen miles north of here.

Tomorrow is Mother's Day. I am going to keep watching the aurora forecast tonight and tomorrow and maybe, just maybe, we will both get to see it.

I really want this for her.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Alice 😭 Thank you. I am going to keep trying! If we have to fly to the Shetland Islands sometime soon, well, then so be it. (We both want to go.)

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Alice A person can dream!

Alice, to random
@Alice@beige.party avatar

I've officially reached the age where I’m apparently older than all of the SNL cast members' moms.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Alice current cast members, my dear. It's okay. I could be their grandma.

RickiTarr, to random
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You are going to make love to a Cereal Mascot, who do you choose?

I'm going Snap, Crackle, & Pop.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr The frikken lucky charms guy. Redhead on redhead. Gotta be awesome.

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

So, what's the thing, what's the big thing no one can help you with? How do you cope with it?

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@RickiTarr Hmmm. Probably my late-realized autism.

It's not "curable" and there are no drugs for it, which I really don't mind. It's given me such deep insight into my entire life that it's been a very valuable and helpful realization. But, even with this self-knowledge, my daily life isn't easy.

How do I cope? Connecting with other ND people, both here on the Fedi and IRL. They're all amazing human beings who make me feel much less alone and weird.

lifewithtrees, to actuallyadhd
@lifewithtrees@mstdn.social avatar

“What do you want to do 5 years from now?”

🤔

😬

🤯

I am having a difficult time visioning 5 years from now, what I want to do and then how to get there.

Some of this is due to the chaos of the last few years, but I also think it could be a challenge due to

Also I am 42 so midlife stuff?

That all said, how do you vision 5 years from now?

@actuallyadhd @actuallyautistic

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@lifewithtrees @actuallyadhd @actuallyautistic I have always found this a nonsensical question and have never been able to answer it. I am I incapable of making a five-year plan. A single year never even goes or ends the way I hope it will. Five is impossible!

Uair, to actuallyautistic
@Uair@autistics.life avatar

@actuallyautistic

How are you with animals?

I tend to throw off the wrong vibe for people, but get along with even the iffy animals. Dogs that don't like most people warm to me.

Just wondering how much of that is autism and how much me. My dad hates animals.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Uair @actuallyautistic 100% better with animals than people.

RickiTarr, to random
@RickiTarr@beige.party avatar

Where do you live and how do you feel about it?

Obviously, don't tell me exactly where you live, no actual addresses please! You can be as vague as you like.

I live in Central Missouri in the U.S.

Pros:

This is an absolutely beautiful place, green rolling hills, lots of rivers, lakes, ponds, and natural springs, cool caves to explore.

Lots of farming here, so great access to quality fruits, vegetables, meat, eggs, and dairy.

It's relatively inexpensive to live here compared with other states, because it's a "flyover".

I'm close enough to three major cities, that it's an easy day trip, and I'm about halfway to anywhere in the U.S.

We have one of the best Conservation departments in the U.S. and this is one of the few things that is a bipartisan issue. Lots of awesome nature programs that are free or cheap, state parks, conservation areas, bird watching, hunting, boating, foraging available to everyone.

Cons:

Yeah, it's a big one, it is a RED STATE, while a lot of the cities are blue, there is a large rural population, that votes red. Abortion is not legal here. People often vote against their own self interest.

While I'm not against responsible gun ownership, lots of people aren't responsible, and people have access to guns that definitely should not.

We have very few employee protections here, while the cost of living is relatively low compared with other places, it's taken years to get to a $12 minimum wage, and it's still not enough.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@rrb @RickiTarr I did hear a story this morning about Cherokee, North Carolina where the sovereign native nation has just opened up medical marijuana. They are pursuing recreational. It was inspiring! The first person they interviewed was an 80-year-old woman. I was like, heck yeah! She sounded just like my auntie.

Alice, to random
@Alice@beige.party avatar

I found these backpacks near my house and I have two theories:

(1) Oliver and Oliver are twins, but Oliver 1’s name is pronounced with a fancy British accent and Oliver 2’s name is pronounced with an over-exaggerated Cockney accent.

(2) There is only one Oliver and he’s an absent-minded time traveler who keeps forgetting his backpack in which case, F him because his reckless behavior is going to create a paradox if he keeps up with this BS.

arisummerland,
@arisummerland@beige.party avatar

@Alice Time travel.

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