Clarence Thomas missing Supreme Court hearing raises eyebrows

Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, 75, sparked raised eyebrows over his whereabouts when he was absent during oral arguments on Monday, and the Court provided no explanation.

Chief Justice John Roberts addressed Thomas’ lack of presence, according to NBC News’ Lawrence Hurley, saying that Thomas “is not on the bench today” but would “participate fully” in the two cases being argued based on the briefs and transcripts.

“Context that may or may not be helpful: In the recent past, Justice Thomas phoned into oral arguments when he couldn’t attend in person, allowing him to ask questions remotely. He isn’t doing so this time,” wrote Slate reporter Mark Joseph Stern on X, formerly Twitter.

Sam_Bass,

He could stay out to make the court 0.00000000001% more respectable

bradorsomething,

Really hoping he calls in for oral arguments tomorrow and its really a morning radio prank show.

LordCrom,

Maybe he took John Oliver up on that sweet RV

TetraVega,

It’s a motor coach

Xtallll,
@Xtallll@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

Frantically searching for News reports of tragic motorhome accidents.

robocall,
@robocall@lemmy.world avatar

Hopefully he just doesn’t ever come back

TheJims,

His flight from Moscow was delayed.

UnderpantsWeevil,
@UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world avatar

Moscow? Pfff… dude’s chilling in a mega-delux RV in Dallas.

You don’t need to fly all the way to Moscow for some plutocrat to pad your wallet. This is America! We took comically corrupt judicial appointments straight from its English roots and juiced it up with 19th century capitalism.

partial_accumen,

When reached for comment Chief Justice Roberts relayed the events that occurred that morning leading to Justice Thomas’s unplanned absence. “I called him up and said, dude, you’re on the schedule to work this morning. Where the hell are you? And he said ‘bro, I’m like totally hung over. I was partying with these insurrectionists last night at a rooftop rave rolling my balls off. Babe, can you hand me that water bottle? No, that wasn’t talking you Bob. Can you, like, call Ruth to cover?’ And I’m like ‘Hey asshole, I’m tired of covering your damn shifts. Ruth doesn’t work here anymore, and you know that. Get your ass in here or I’m marking you as ‘unexcused absence’. And he’s like ‘no can do, bro. I’m Audi 5000 today, see ya!’ and then he totally hung up! I swear, I don’t even think he wants this job anymore. I wish he’d fuckin’ quit already.”

Wow, I never knew such drama exists so high in our third brand government. Is this what the framers intended?

postmateDumbass,

Justice Long Dong Silver was too busy in Mitch McConnell’s sex dungeon and missed his private flight?

Thief_of_Crows,

Presumably the Yacht had engine trouble and he and Crowe are on an island with Ginger, Maryanne, and the captain.

DoucheBagMcSwag, (edited )

Maybe he’s fucking dead

Edit: fuck.

harrys_balzac,

Don’t. Don’t give me hope.

UnderpantsWeevil,
@UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world avatar

He’s taken the next logical step from “Napping through Oral Arguments” and is now skipping the actual hearings entirely.

He’ll show up for five minutes to tell his clerks how to write their opinions, then catch the next flight out to a Bohemian Grove. Unless someone smuggles a syphilitic child into the old people Adrenochrome orgy, dude is going to live for another 70 years.

BmeBenji,

I thought it said “Clarence Thomas missing eyebrows” and honestly that would make his face look as soulless as his soul is

KammicRelief,

LOL I came in to post similar.

not_that_guy05,

Wait, did he take the deal that John Oliver proposed?

Madison420,

I think the clock ran out on that to be honest. He’d probably agree to it anyway so long as that pos vacates.

geekworking,

He’s waiting for the check to clear.

Hegar,
Hegar avatar

It's fine, he just decided to be bribed from home for the day.

Ghyste,

Anyone have his address? We should send him cards.

dream_weasel,

Cards… Yes…

Zerlyna,
@Zerlyna@lemmy.world avatar

Thoughts and prayers too!!!

IrateAnteater,

The most annoying part of this is that even if he quits wasting our oxygen, it’s “too close to the election” for the Senate to do their jobs and confirm the replacement.

GBU_28,

If Donald Trump gets to appoint like half of the supreme court during his overall tenure I’m gonna shit his pants

macarthur_park,

Nah, democrats have a majority in the senate and republicans removed the ability to filibuster Supreme Court confirmations in order to seat Gorsuch. The 60 vote requirement was still in place in 2016 when democrats tried to fill scalia’s seat, and enough democrats were unwilling to change the rules to remove that requirement. Now that it’s gone there shouldn’t be any issue confirming a new justice.

PyroNeurosis,

Expecting Democrats to not tie their own hands here is… optimistic.

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