anathema

anathema, 8 days ago to random

I don’t like how difficult it is to wake up and get out of bed

18+ anathema, 27 days ago to random

My life feels like a hopeless waste. Transition feels like a mistake. In return for less disassociation I’m more depressed, more self-conscious, more anxious, often too scared to leave the house, just deciding what to wear can break me, mirrors are more upsetting than before. I feel like shit, I look like shit, and I’m tired of fighting against it.

I should have listened to the voice that told me I was too bald to do this.

anathema, 29 days ago to random

If I must suffer can I at least suffer beautifully?

anathema, 2 months ago to random

Going through another period of having The Thoughts it seems.

Where the thoughts are "actually I was happier and more confident before I transitioned"

My memory says this is true, external observers say it isn't.

Maybe I just wish my life was easy / simple again. Maybe if I wasn't still bald and hairy in wrong places The Thoughts wouldn't come back?

Maybe I just miss being physically strong and the confidence that allowed me to take up physical space?

eniko, 3 months ago to random

"Wow eni you sure are posting a lot about covid lately"

Thanks I'm mourning the life I used to have

whitequark, 4 months ago to random

inspired by @stargirl, a "no stupid questions" thread!

ask me any question about embedded development, FPGAs, programming languages, life, angel girls, or anything else you think I know about, and I'll do my best to answer them

anathema, 4 months ago to random

Have the start of a migraine and getting sad about the gulf between the cis and trans experiences of womanhood

anathema, 5 months ago to random

Sometimes my girlfriend concerns me

eniko, 5 months ago to random

i finally found a reason to use ConditionalWeakTable :D

eniko, 5 months ago to random

its kinda weird C# doesn't have an IString interface. i know ReadOnlySpan<char> kinda functions as that interface now, but it's still a little weird to me

anathema, 5 months ago to random

My housemate has “a cold plus sore throat” she contracted after travelling and is coughing dozens of times an hour yet says it’s “unlikely” it’s COVID :bowsette_blonde_angry:

She knows my girlfriend is immunocompromised yet I still had to ask her to wear a mask when she isn’t in her room :/

eniko, 5 months ago to random

realizing that almost anything you can do in C# with reflection can be done with a source generator almost as easily

anathema, 5 months ago to random

Guess I’m trying advent of code this year. New job has a leaderboard and I need people to think I can actually write code

eniko, 5 months ago to random

Okay so now that I have multiple people who have affirmed my managed arenas idea is a good idea, how do i fork the .NET runtime so I can add them? >_>

eniko, 5 months ago to random

So I made my arena allocator thing and that's cool and useful, I'll inevitably use it for something because avoiding garbage allocations in C# can be so dang hard

But I'm still thinking about it as a GC optimization structure. There's nothing that says an arena can't act like a normal GCed object that acts as an opaque container for other objects within so that the GC only has to look at the arena and not all of its contents. Doing this actually solves the issue I have with the arena allocator design in that clearing the arena makes all pointers to items within it stale references, which means any such references act as weak references, which is a blemish on the design

But there's nothing saying you can't just wait to free anything in the arena until your tracing GC has determined the arena is garbage, ie nothing has a reference to it (or its contents) anymore. This would make it work exactly like any other part of a tracing GC system

vascorsd, 6 months ago to programming

Look ma, more languages are adopting the same feature we have in #scala
"_.Property shorthand for (fun x -> x.Property)"

Though everything else in Fsharp seems highly weird and complex.

--

Announcing F# 8 - .NET Blog - https://devblogs.microsoft.com/dotnet/announcing-fsharp-8/

#programming #programmingLanguages #dotnet

rml, 6 months ago to zig

out of the new "modern #C" or "C+" or whatever languages like #zig (right), #hare (left) seems to be the nicest, at the language level at least. clean block structure is hugely underrated and otherwise nice languages that take it for granted to ensure you can do

node.* = .{ .data = value, .next = null };
if (this.end) |end| end.next = node
else this.start = node;
this.end = node;

...completely ruins a block's clarity with too much syntax, which is part of what makes C code very confusing depsite being a minimal language (I also think there is something nice about the way that C does it, but its nice because you've seen it forever, not because they were great design decisions)

meanwhile I don't need to read anything about hare or even squint to read the code and understand whats happening.

pub fn Oucue(comptime Child: type) type { [ T const This = @This(); const Node = struct { data: Child, LSS [N } gpa: std.mem.Allocator, Bl el (LN end: ?*Node, pub fn init(gpa: std.mem.Allocator) This { return This{ gpa = gpa, BTN ELE VI iy b pub fn engueue(this: This, value: Child) !void { const node = try this.gpa.create(Node); node. = .{ .data = value, .next = null }; if (this.end) |end| end.next = node // else this.start = node; this.end = node; b pub fn dequeue(this: *This) ?Child { const start = this.start orelse return null; defer this.gpa.destroy(start); if (start.next) |next| this.start = next (AT this.start = null; this.end = null; b return start.data; b iy b test "queue” { var int_queue = Queue(i32).init(std.testing.allocator); try int_queue.enqueue(25); try int_queue.enqueue(50); try int_queue.enqueue(75); try int_queue.enqueue(160); try std.testing.expectEqual(int_queue.dequeue(), 25); trv std.testina.expectEaual(int aueue.deaueue(). 50):

b0rk, 6 months ago (edited 6 months ago) to random

if you're an infrequent command line user -- what text editor do you use if you need to occasionally edit a file on the command line (other than vim/emacs)?

curious about what people use to edit a git commit message etc

if you picked 'other', I'd love to hear what you do in the replies!