@thearchers Joy's behaving like the murderer in an episode of Columbo. Given the impending absence of our local policeman, I wonder who'll be playing Falk - Mick, perhaps, or the sainted George?
But it's all over now, so I'll just have to tune in next week. Unless it isn't raining...
It's nearly time for #TheArchers Omnibus, and I'm practically smouldering with optimism.
That's because I've spent all morning waiting for the rain to stop so I can put the rubbish out, which is just the sort of mental preparation a regular listener needs.
@thearchers It seems that it's the script that's the problem, but we'll let that lie. Do we know what Laura does, yet? Feed merchant seems unlikely, HSE inspector too convenient, and if she was big in turnips I'm sure we would have heard.
Good lord. It's dancercise. But at least it's an opportunity to read up on rogue milk purchasing businesses. You won't hear about them on the wireless.
And it's all over now. It seems to have stooped raining, too. Or maybe it's just my mood that's lifted.
It's nearly time for #TheArchers Omnibus, in which a weekload of episodes are shovelled out at once for the benefit of those who couldn't be bothered with it during the week yet, somehow, have nothing better to do on a Sunday.
So let's see what's happened this week. Did anyone win the cricket? How many wheels are on Harry's wagon? And will there ever be sheep?
@thearchers Ah. The Lord Mayor of Felpersham. I was wondering, though I can't think why.
There's a robin at the rewilding, and Harry's helpfully fallen off the wagon, posing a dilemma that we've spent a fortnight doing to death already.
Personally, I'd have just re-badged some dandelions, but the primrose path has literary implications that have gloriously ambiguous merit in an educational context.
And now Lilian's rumbled Alice, too. She's getting good at rumbling.
It's almost time for #TheArchers Omnibus, a weekly round-up of all the desperate things the scriptwriters have had to do to map the nihilistic vortex of existential despair onto the agricultural calendar.
I'm happy to announce that I've both had my walk and got home in time for the #ArchersOmnibus, where they're short of staff at the Bull and George is fantasising about sticking it to Hannah and Uncle Chris.
Meanwhile, Fallon's going to gatecrash a Plod's disciplinary, in a way that I wouldn't expect is normal, and Miranda's parading her ex-husband's name as if it's some sort of trophy. Which, I suppose, it is.
@thearchers And here we finish, with Alice caught nicely in Creepy Harry's trap.
All the goats, cows, horses, llamas - even the little birdies in the trees - have remained throughout as silent as the lambs, and I can't say I blame them.
@thearchers And that's our lot for a week in which the scripties seem to have given up on Gaskell and turned to Bulwer-Lytton.
Who, admittedly, had his points, not least as unwitting Grand Patron of the Rosicrucians, but has otherwise been allowed to rest in well-deserved peace.
We're lumbering up to #TheArchers Omnibus so it's all tea and excitement in this household, or will be if I manage to find any.
Last week we found Jim spoiling for a restraining order, ill-advised wall hangings at the tea-room and soupiness at the dog-mender's, but nothing at all (again) in the way of sheep or goats or barley.
@thearchers "When I don't speak them out loud, they just go round and round in my head" says Alice, of her thoughts. As if thoughts ever do anything else, whether you speak them out loud or not.
Soundwise, we got some horses, though not at Cheltenham, and George's electric screwdriver.
And Miranda, who has no office "as such", is for some reason sweet-talking Brian, presumably to serve the scripties' purpose of getting Will's house foreclosed on by Justin.
@HeatherMJ@thearchers Nor me. A cow hide seems a gruesomely imposing sort of thing to have on a wall.
That said, I'm not too sure about sheepskins, either. But that's probably because, once upon a time, I used to walk daily past the yard of a Yorkshire fellmonger, and have never been able to entirely forget the clouds of flies or the spring-to-autumn stench.
@wibble@thearchers
I'm perhaps a bit more disposed to sheep's fleece. I have got a spinning wheel and, very occasionally, have been known to spin some fleece badly. Which reminds me, it's time I had another go at it.
@HarrietMonkhouse@thearchers That's an idea. And a much more wholesome one than I was having regarding any potential Burns-Casey collaboration. Though I doubt, unless crime was involved, that it would pay any better than crime.
@thearchers To be fair, we did get a passing reference to a 1970's sit-com, and a little clunky sky-hookery but the expected "many hands make light work" gag, which must be celebrating its centenary around now, went sadly unremarked.
It's creeping up to 10 o'clock in Grim and Miserable Time, and thus #TheArchers, a radio soap in which a handful of actors (or one skilful impressionist) reads out a script against a wilfully curated background of allegedly agricultural noises.
Last week, IIRC, a sweet little doggy had eaten part of a publican, and I can't see them improving on that. But, being charitable, I'll suspend my disbelief, at least for one more week.
@wibble@thearchers
I stopped listening a few years back, so I greatly appreciate your succinct round-ups of the week’s action. Thus far, I haven’t felt the need to tune in again.
Not that I'm admitting to silliness - there have been plenty of times when I haven't felt the need to tune in, either.
But, sadly, my resolve often fails. Possibly it's because I was brought up when Sundays were a sort of penance; a scratchy-clothed day to consider my sins, put my pocket-money in the vicar's plate and spend the afternoon quietly watching nothing happen.
So, in some subtle ways, The Archers re-connects me with my childhood.
@thearchers The fashion show was mercifully brief. And now we're within earshot of a road that has a car passing every fifteen seconds, which seems a bit much for the rurals, even after closing.
@thearchers That was odd, and somewhat implausible. As was the instant reconciliation of Mia and Brad, presumably hurried along to make way for a sudden idea.
But, disappointing though it was, with all the no sheep, no cows, no deer, no rustling corn and no burgeoning potatoes, I'll probably tune in next week, all the same.
It's 10 o'clock and, as they haven't changed the clocks again or declared a National Emergency, time for #TheArchers Omnibus.
Though Advent is traditionally, like Lent, a time of fasting, commercial imperatives will doubtless keep the tea-room busy, so I'm hoping to hear from that, with or without background bleating.
@Malwen@thearchers Thanks. So that means, subject to status, Kate will have company when she's chucked out on the street. Unless the Laurels can be bribed to change their rules, first...