Go and mix up the "women's" and "men's" sections until the division is meaningless. Take the gender roles that have harmed you and twist them into being yours. Subvert, shift, and change the binary until it breaks from only two to infinite.
Our gift to the world as nonbinary people is destroying the constraints that the gender binary places on all people who come into contact with it.
You don't have to be consistently "feminine" or "masculine" in your appearance as a nonbinary person if you don't want to be. You don't have to engage with either at all.
Those categories are very subjective and flexible for us. Bend and mix them for your use. Invent something new.
"One is not #born, but rather becomes, a #woman. No #biological, #psychological, or #economic destiny defines the figure that the #human#female acquires in #society; it is #civilization as a whole that develops this product, intermediate between female and #eunuch, which one calls #feminine. Only the mediation of another can establish an #individual as an #Other. In so far as he exists for himself, the #child would not be able to understand himself as sexually differentiated. In #girls as in #boys the #body is first of all the radiation of a #subjectivity, the instrument that accomplishes the comprehension of the world: it is through the eyes, the hands, and not through the sexual parts that children apprehend the universe."
—Simone de #Beauvoir, philosopher and social theorist, in The Second Sex (1949)
Just my favorite Second Wave feminist, shattering the entire concept of the gender binary and "biological womanhood" in one masterful swoop.
Several #contradictory seeming things can be true at the same time. Like:
The #GenderBinary is a completely made up social construct that limits individuals.
The gender binary is an important cornerstone for many to develop their sense of identity.
Both are true. "Social constructs" may be arbitrary, but they still can hold meaning within a society without modelling the whole complexity of an issue. We often need a point of reference - either to find ourself within its power of definition, or to unpack it and discover how we do not fit within its definition. So when I, personally, say that binary gender is an arbitrary convention, this does not come with a negative judgement.
As much a left handed or a right handed coordinate system do not contain a judgement - they just contextualize statements we make. We could make any number of equally arbitrary conventions with as much power of definition. It's just for gender, the binary has become something of a common denominator for general discussion.
So we need to remember that things can be both arbitrary and meaningful at the same time, and not take offense at that notion.
Being nonbinary does not make you broken. In fact, it's quite the opposite. You have put yourself back together after the gender binary tried to break you apart.
You are far from "broken" in this. You have made yourself whole by discovering who you really are.