Not The Onion

A toilet paper company is offering members of the public the chance to have old love letters from their exes turned into recycled bathroom tissue for Valentine's Day.

A pigeon suspected of spying for China and held for eight months was released by Indian officials this week after intervention from animal rights organization PETA, the group said in a statement.

Charged with re-ordering the 2022 Olympic team figure skating medals after Kamila Valieva DQ, the ISU apparently failed to use its own rulebook....

https://archive.is/0frbs

https://archive.is/RVDaM

https://archive.ph/9ckoX

Under the Mississippi Constitution, people convicted of 10 specific felonies, including bribery, theft and arson, lose the right to vote. Under a previous state attorney general, the list was expanded to 22 crimes, including timber larceny — felling and stealing trees from someone else’s property — and carjacking....

The package delivery company DPD's AI chatbot was caught swearing at customers -- and even insulting DPD itself.

Dr. Sean Kirkpatrick had a few choice words for the public on his way out the door of the Pentagon's All-domain Anomaly Resolution Office.

Belgian customs officers seized three times as much cocaine in the port of Antwerp last year as U.S. customs and border officials seized in all of the United States.

Jad Sleiman was a reporter in Philadelphia before he was fired over his budding comedy career. Now, his employer has been ordered to reinstate him.

msn link: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/israel-orders-more-gazans-to-flee-bombs-areas-where-it-sends-them/ar-AA1kZ4rK...

Members of a French motorcycle group against bullying are charged with threats to headteacher.

Aardman differs from most other major animation studio because of its use of Lewis Newsplast to mould its characters....

The ongoing state of stress and anxiety in Israel has led to weight gain for many, but understanding how stress works can actually aid in shedding pounds while maintaining overall health.

Archived page [https://ghostarchive.org/archive/KFV18], if you’re paywalled or region-blocked.

A rights advocate said, “This is like the CIA putting out a statement saying that going forward they’ll only waterboard people with dignity and respect.”

“The report states that witnesses inside the house saw Williams pour gasoline from a soda bottle onto clothes and the floor of the laundry room. Williams then lit Takis tortilla chips on fire and tossed them into the laundry room.”

The finance department has entered into a $32,000 contract with an external consultant to provide advice on how it should engage other external consultants who also provide advice to government, in a move that has been slammed as a “laughable scenario”....

A scene in the film features a map depicting China's territorial claims in the disputed South China Sea.

Generations have been stereotyped in so many ways—from being quiet quitters to narcissists. But maybe it isn't a generational thing after all.