@traumaphoenix@chaos.social
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

traumaphoenix

@traumaphoenix@chaos.social

transfem enby(s) and dissociative system of 12, please handle with care

feel free to follow, mostly a vibe check.

hobbies include but aren’t limited to: writing comfy software, photography (mostly birds, sometimes landscapes or architecture), other miscellaneous creative endeavors

photography is CC BY-NC 4.0, higher resolutions available on request

:disability_flag: :trans_flag: :nonbinary_flag: :anarchoheart1: ΘΔ

PSA: our avatar and first name is gonna change a lot (synced to PluralKit)

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

traumaphoenix, to random
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

inkjet pride flag 🦋

traumaphoenix, to random
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

destroy capitalism 🦋

whitequark, to random
@whitequark@mastodon.social avatar

me: i am a kbity meow meow
my headmate: I will study hard to enroll in med school in a few years, something that is normal to want and possible to achieve.
me: meow?
my headmate: (takes private lessons from an MD every week at a comparatively breakneck pace despite not even qualifying for entry exams yet)

what the heck

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@whitequark is she better at kbity meow meow tho 🦋

jacqueline, to random
@jacqueline@chaos.social avatar

codeberg pretty good so far! lots of good little features

traumaphoenix,
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@jacqueline gitea/forgejo though, right? still missing HTTP pull tokens and CODEOWNERS :/ 🦋

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@jacqueline oh, speak of the devil: https://github.com/go-gitea/gitea/pull/24910

yeah i kinda just expected a smaller github/gitlab and it's... kinda too full of holes for that use case 🦋

Terra, to random
@Terra@chaosfem.tw avatar

Fun fact: I still doubt I'm really Trans.

Seriously.

There's so much that doesn't fit. I play the games online and joke about the stereotypes, but I don't fit most of them.

And I don't fit a lot of the history either. Joking and laughing about obviousness aside, when I'm alone in the dark, I still serious doubt it all. In many ways I feel like a fake Trans person.

But a friend gave me a really good question to ask myself: So what?

See, here's what I know:

My brain feels better on Estrogen. My body feels better with girl parts. I feel more at ease when society sees me as a girl.

So, in the end, what if I just like it better this way? What if I'm not really Trans? So what?

It doesn't matter to me if I'm not Trans, because I know that I am happier.

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@Terra it’s funny, i’ve stopped doubting that i’m trans but i still don’t really have a firm grip on my gender

best i’ve got is “demigirl” and some therian feels bouncing around 🦋

evacide, to random
@evacide@hachyderm.io avatar

"Three years ago, Apple introduced a privacy-enhancing feature that hid the Wi-Fi address of iPhones and iPads when they joined a network. On Wednesday, the world learned that the feature has never worked as advertised."

https://arstechnica.com/security/2023/10/iphone-privacy-feature-hiding-wi-fi-macs-has-failed-to-work-for-3-years/

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@evacide oh that’s less impactful than i thought

if the feature that rotates the identifier when the device is unassociated and scanning for networks didn’t work, i’d actually be scared 🦋

jacqueline, to random
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today we discussed finding a more friendly/easy source host than sourcehut and concluded that everything fucking sucks. sorry.

traumaphoenix,
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@jacqueline yeah i'm not a fan either cause it's missing important features like CODEOWNERS and HTTP read-only pull tokens 🦋

whitequark, to random
@whitequark@mastodon.social avatar

my favorite Python package manager, PDM, now lets you install the minimum allowed dependency version, rather than the maximum found. (like cargo -Z direct-minimal-versions).

this is exceptionally useful in making sure that your software still works with the minimum versions specified

i am such a happy cat =^___^=

https://github.com/pdm-project/pdm/issues/2310

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@whitequark dang i should get on the PDM train

we have a lot of issues like this at work 🦋

mattgrayyes, to random
@mattgrayyes@chaos.social avatar

I highly recommend against locking your car keys, house keys and wallet in your car, in the peterboroughsire countryside nearly 100 miles from home, where your spare car key is.

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@mattgrayyes oh yeah, that reminds me someone i knew used to keep an analog car key underneath their car somewhere

it won't start the car because of the transponder, but it's perfect for this situation 🦋

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@bornach @mattgrayyes probably not them lol

traumaphoenix, to random
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

i feel like the instance domain block UI needs a "you are about to sever 250,000 relationships, are you sure" 🦋

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

maybe with one of those "enter the number of relationships you're about to destroy for confirmation"

0xabad1dea, to random
@0xabad1dea@infosec.exchange avatar

just got an automatic refund out of nowhere from amaz*n because they claim the package, which I received in good working order, was returned to them undelivered. ??? did interdimensional shenanigans occur

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@0xabad1dea yeah they’ll do that for items that disappear out of their system and aren’t worth a whole lot

basically the driver forgot to hit “package delivered” and amazon thinks it fell off the truck 🦋

drewdevault, to random
@drewdevault@fosstodon.org avatar

Is it just me or has anyone else had problems transcoding their offline music collection into a format Android doesn't choke on... for the past, like, 10 years

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@drewdevault ogg vorbis is probably the most widely supported, however the compression ratio kinda sucks 🦋

Terra, to random
@Terra@chaosfem.tw avatar

I think one of the more damaging messages about transition is that people are happier post-transition, because it is presented in media as if people are instantly happier immediately after coming out.

It leaves no room for the incredible difficulty of processing a lifetime of trauma, both intentional and unintentional. Or of existing in society as an Other that people openly discuss in genocidal terms. Or even just the fear inherent in learning our own very new bodies.

The view is often "You're out now, you should be happy all the time." And if you are not, it feels like you're failing at transition. "Why aren't you happy, then?" And hearing that, you're always asking yourself the same question, and deep down you start questioning whether you're really Trans at all.

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@Terra yeahhh

in the process of getting on HRT, we figured out we were plural, which was cool

then a year-ish later, someone new shows up in our system and goes "so here's the rest of what you've been missing", and... oh no. it isn't good. it really is not good. 🦋

mcc, to random
@mcc@mastodon.social avatar

My constant experience with Python over the last ~16 years is I start writing it and it's like, wow, this is so easy, this is great! And then I run my program, and invariably it fails with an inscrutable error/exception 4 layers deep in someone else's library, code I know nothing about— in this case, a wav file library claiming that the number 960 is "not a valid shape"— and I realize that maybe I actually hate Python

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@mcc honestly, yeah same

i wish there was an easier way to write type checks for the big complex types you can create with the typing import

as it stands today, you have to dynamically check every attribute conforms to the type hint written 🦋

whitequark, to random
@whitequark@mastodon.social avatar

they should make respirators in which you can make out

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@whitequark drinking straw mod while you're at it? 🦋

whitequark, to random
@whitequark@mastodon.social avatar

you know, at this point, even if SARS-CoV-2 was magically eradicated from the entire world, i'd still wear the MSA 900. i haven't got a common cold since i started wearing one and for that reason alone i'm happy to walk around in a respirator

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@whitequark likewise, and i’ve definitely had moments in public where i just know “yep, would have definitely gotten covid from this” (mostly people coughing like mad on trains) 🦋

GossiTheDog, to random
@GossiTheDog@cyberplace.social avatar

The UK government are planning to follow China and require security vulnerabilities be reported centrally and then remain unpatched to allow Five Eyes access. https://www.justsecurity.org/87615/changes-to-uk-surveillance-regime-may-violate-international-law/

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@GossiTheDog can’t wait for the next EternalBlue. 🦋

esther, to random
@esther@strangeobject.space avatar

In Germany you can say the most messed up shit imaginable, as long as you do it in a “nice” tone and without a non-german accent.

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@esther i think that’s why i just interpret most german speech against me as immediately hostile

doesn’t help my confirmation bias that i’m right 75% of the time 🦋

jacqueline, to random
@jacqueline@chaos.social avatar

just found out there’s a second, unrelated linus tech tips controversy happening at the same time

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@jacqueline yea the second one actually made me go unsub from the other channels too

fucking ew 🦋

traumaphoenix, to random
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

it’s kinda fucked how if you as an individual provide a service for free (in Germany), you’re not afforded the same protections against people using your free service to do something illegal

the state will just think it’s you and raid your shit

no one would provide things for free, are you insane, this is capitalism, you’re doing something nefarious 🦋

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@eater probably a company, yeah 🦋

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@eater i’m pretty sure we still have a constitutional Section 230-equivalent

it’s just unilaterally ignored by law enforcement

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@eater found it: https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/tmg/__10.html

traumaphoenix, to random
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

i read the first asimov robots book and now i’m seeing pop culture references to it everywhere 🦋

whitequark, to random
@whitequark@mastodon.social avatar

people talk about programming being "fun" and debugging being "unfun" but this makes no sense in my personal frame. i can get enthralled in debugging as easily, if not more easily, as i can in the design and implementation

the one thing that makes a computer thing unfun is having been abused in vicinity of it in the past (at work or not)

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@whitequark this is why i will never make photography my job

i can’t go through 8 hours of abuse and then do the same thing for myself, “for fun” 🦋

whitequark, to random
@whitequark@mastodon.social avatar

found a glaring bug in the github user interface

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@whitequark oh, like the one where it shows you the outstanding notification count of an enterprise you’re not allowed to see because you’re not SAML-authed? 🦋

whitequark, to random
@whitequark@mastodon.social avatar

me: doesn't want to use a desktop because i like how i have my laptop set up and don't wanna sync it manually
my headmate, who just bought a desktop and is completely normal: sets up her NAS to be an ActiveDirectory domain controller, joins both of her devices to the new domain, and sets up roaming profiles

not only all of that somehow works, but she didn't spend a week getting it to function.

i'm speechless

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@whitequark oh dang, that’s actually a pretty smart application of SDNs i hadn’t considered up until now

a fully roamable AD 🦋

esther, to random
@esther@strangeobject.space avatar

What the fuck happened in Tiergarten?!

Look along a park path with more trash on the sides

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@esther if it’s anything like our local german park, grill people and then, crows 🦋

traumaphoenix, to random
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

they should make a camera sensor that just has a gradient of increasing resolution towards the center of the frame

the cropping range would be amazing 🦋

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

GFX100S: “am i a joke to you”

esther, to photography
@esther@strangeobject.space avatar

Some recent analog black and white shots. I haven't done analog in at least15 years. The look is still worth it. Digital just doesn't do this.

Film: Ilford HP5+

very grainy b/w shot of two empty chairs behind a large storefront window. a door in the background is slightly ajar
dark b/w shot of a contraction scaffolding over the sidewalk, looking down the length of it. the outline of a person is visible in the distance
high contrast b/w shot of a house entrance full of stickers and graffiti. on the top of the door it days in large letters "Yorckstr" and it has a plastic sign with the number "1" hanging slightly askew

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@esther this does make me want to go outside and shoot a (virtual) roll of Acros… 🦋

whitequark, (edited ) to random
@whitequark@mastodon.social avatar

sudden throwback to a biology (or, possibly, chemistry) lecture in high school during which the teacher (yes, during, school hours) mentioned that it's possible for girls to get drunk more efficiently by using a tampon soaked in ethanol

until now it didn't register to me as a completely unhinged thing to say to your pupils

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@whitequark y’know, this is how some trans women take their HRT…

sounds fun, but the isopropyl from that burns enough for my taste 🦋

whitequark, to random
@whitequark@mastodon.social avatar

plurality hot takes:

  • full personhood requires being able to date you without dating your headmates
  • full personhood requires being able to like you without liking your headmates

these are 'hot takes' because if you've been around queer people you'll have noticed that many can't even deal with these two if you s/headmate/friend/

(the good old 'you would have to be in our polycule, for convenience' excuse)

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@whitequark currently having this discussion with a friend

i think it’s okay for a system to decide that they’re one unit if they’re all okay with it, but my friend clearly isn’t happy with that arrangement :/ 🦋

traumaphoenix,
@traumaphoenix@chaos.social avatar

@whitequark i wish we could attain that level of logical separation, but uhhh… don’t feel like explaining that to employers, they barely even know we’re trans

definitely trying in the rest of our life, though (different emails, configs, (we should run NixOS already))

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