After two weeks I visited reddit again. Holy shit the misogyny and lack of critical thinking in the comments is something else.
Eternal summer over there
Absolutely. This place may be less active, but discussions have definitely been much more civil and constructive. So far, I haven't had any toxic reactions to any of my comments, whereas on reddit no matter what you write or however careful you write it, there would always be someone taking offense at it or being awful in the comments.
I don't mind discussion or disagreement, but on reddit this often means "bringing the other guy down" instead of making your own point.
As this started happening more and more throughout the years, I've often wondered if it was me, if I was so out of touch, but it turned out it was really the children (redditors) who were wrong.
As this started happening more and more throughout the years, I’ve often wondered if it was me, if I was so out of touch, but it turned out it was really the children (redditors) who were wrong.
my personal hypothesis is that the empathic and constructive people are exactly the ones driven away by the money hungry deconstructing antics that reddit leadership currently display.
That's a great way to filter people in some way. I wonder for how long this will last. I'm not saying it can't be permanent but I'm sure at some point it will attract awful people
The first batch of people to make the jump IMO would have been quite open-minded and not afraid to try something new.
Add in the entry barriers (When I joined, the big instances had either closed or manual signups, prior to lemmyworld and shititjustworks exploding in popularity) and that kind of faff probably weeded out trolls and people looking to cause trouble.
A lot of the "awful" people don't care about the API or Spez's attitude, they just want to consume, so have no reason really to make the jump to Lemmy/Kbin
On Reddit, I gave up on engaging with anything that people even have strong opinions about years ago because I wasn't there looking for a bad time. It's a hard habit to get out of; I'm basically that pink blob in a box meme.
I haven't even questioned my assumptions on a lot of things because you would simply get attacked or banned for voicing any opinion contrary to the echo chamber you found yourself in so you just stopped thinking about it beyond don't interact with these people.
I couldn't agree more, discussion is a lot more civil. Even when we're all disagreeing I've found people are giving each other room to put their point forward and listened (apart from one climate chnage thread but nothings perfect).
Bad day? Because there's no way to word myself more neutrally, that came out of left field and it kinda makes you come off like one of those "can't be racist against white people" people...
I'm assuming that they understood that, because they said (I assume pejoratively) that they sounded like a "can't be racist against white people" leftist. If they had failed to notice the sarcasm, they would be taking the sarcasm at face value and seeing a pro-male, "all lives matter" type take
The “/s” is used to indicate that the previous text was sarcasm. It’s a fake HTML formatting tag, meaning the sarcastic part of the text is over.
“/s” was popular on reddit (though not with everyone), probably because so many users didn’t speak English as their native language, and sarcasm could be hard for them to detect. Even for native speakers, without tone of voice or body language to rely on, sarcasm could go unrecognized.
Also, some users were willfully ignorant and looking to start a fight, some were oblivious, and others were just morons.
I noticed, but I was taught to take note of the things that people joke about and the /s below a statement doesn't make it without meaning. The mocking of what every reddit MRA is automatically going to say came loud and clear, but in their hyperbolic implication that men have no issues (or none worth mentioning), they've shot over the mark into the technical definition of misandry. This doesn't get to be Schroedinger's Patriarchy, that isn't how feminism works. Downplaying it is why none of them go to therapy, though.
Idk if that's how they actually see things or not. It was obviously written out of frustration, which is why I'm chalking it down to One Of Those Days. I scrolled past it twice before deciding to say something, because it really did feel out of left field and that kind of generalized malice just makes things worse.
Some guy who was already having a shit time is going to read that and it has to make them tired at best. At worst, less likely to take actual issues seriously when they're just implicitly insulted out of the gate before anyone even said anything. Spite is wrong, but that doesn't make people less spiteful and they remember how you make them feel.
I really wanna get as far away from Reddit Culture as possible, to be honest, which I know is a losing battle when we all came from Reddit but I gotta have some hopes up or the universe will be out of a hobby
Edit: in the spirit of not being reddit, I am appreciating how many took the time to explain /s instead of jumping aaaaall the way down my throat like I expected
"I promise I make up fantasies where I get to punch women because I totally just believe in equal rights and not because of misogyny or anything!" - every time. oh and you'd get downvoted to hell if you pointed this stuff out.
Heaven forbid TwoXChromosomes not be a default subreddit. I remember when not every OP was badgered so badly in the comments that she had to go back and ETA "not all men" to the post text. Or how women with scathing and accurate insights about the patriarchy didn't have to always have reddit cares reports filed on their accounts!
2X would get brigaded and trolled by douchebags from r/The Donald before that sub was quarantined and then closed (which was about the time 2X became a default sub), but before it became a default sub, it was a large but mostly niche interest. It was on the radar for incels and ne'erdowells, but those were relatively small fires for the mod team to put out case-by-case through temp and permanent bans. But once 2X became default - and reddit cares was created - this is when I saw even non-antagonizing men feel welcome to join the discussions and throw their weight around to always say "not all men" in response to whatever the OP was. It was largely counterproductive. The mod team at the time protested the incluaion of 2X on the default subs list when that feature was announced.
This subreddit is the reason I jumped ship before the blackouts. I loved interacting with people there and I don't want to participate in what's it's likely to become. Once the third party mod tools are gone there will be no relatively safe spaces for the ladies on Reddit. I don't want any part of the trolling and misogyny that's being unleashed over there.
Perhaps after a couple weeks away (for me) and a steady disengagement in the noise of lonely people trying to make friends I am glad peoples eyes are open to what they don’t want to be. We are not a product!
I feel the majority of people want to have a civil discord. I am mindful that there are also allot of people walking around with pain in their hearts (and not honestly dealing with it). The result is a mindless distraction so we don’t change ourselves. Even try to accept responsibility to the monsters we create. The public discord around social media (twitter \ Reddit) is good. Its a good look in the mirror.
And you know … if we don’t use it … then it becomes unprofitable … then bye bye. I’m not cheering. I’m talking about taking personal responsibility in creating the world we want to live in. Not let this carrot and stick mentality continue.
I've been saying this to friends, but I'd be careful with even cursory viewing of Reddit for the foreseeable future. It took a long enough time as it was for Reddit to become not overwhelmingly reactionary. The Reddit migration moving into primarily leftist spaces is going to leave behind a website that is quite literally conservative, and bitter. (Note that I am not suggesting people stay behind to re-balance it, merely to be aware that the site is not going to be just the same site with less people on it.)
I was just saying to my spouse this morning how it seems that the smart people have left reddit as there is a discernible drop in the comment quality in some of the communities I frequent. Unfortunately they haven’t even been registered here just yet. I am quitting reddit in a week anyway hopefully by then more of those communities will migrate here. I created two (Signal, Amex), hope others will follow suit.
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