I banned my kid from Roblox.... what next?

As we all know, Roblox is garbage tier gameplay structured around psychological cues to get children to fill an endless pit with fake money bought with real money.

So I banned my kid from it. He used it a little bit socially with a few friends of his. What online or local multiplayer games should I help him to replace it with? (He’s 10, so please don’t recommend Diablo 4 or anything else that has quite that much gore)

He and his friends have an Xbox Series X|S at home.

Edit: keep your judgemental shit out of here. His whole social group (5 kids he knows from school) got banned on the same day. Me and the other parents are trying to be nice and replace it with better quality games so it isn’t just a punishment.

Edit2: Thanks guys. I got him Lee Carvallo’s Putting Challenge

Sky_Lobster,

Minecraft?

WetBeardHairs,

That’s a good one! I’m kind of hoping to give him a copy of something as a gift - but he’s already got minecraft. I want him to have options.

can,

Terraria?

WetBeardHairs,

Oh that’s a good one

msage,

Also Calamity mod… it expands Terraria massively

Aatube,
Aatube avatar

FTB modpacks?

WetBeardHairs,

Yeah they play stuff like bedwars.

Aatube,
Aatube avatar

Ah. So they’ve never played co-op stuff before?

Tb0n3,

Roblox is full of different kinds of games, right? Why don’t you find out the kinds of games he likes there and find recommendations based on that? It’s a start at least. I would imagine most of the Roblox games are clones of better games anyway.

WetBeardHairs,

He and his entire friends group on roblox got banned from it in a single day. We’re trying to not be jerks by providing a better game to replace it with. But from what I saw - he was playing some game where he stands there and pokes at a robot that gets bigger while things around it die. Not very stimulating.

sbv,

I play Fortnite with my kid and some friends. We’ve configured comms so he can only chat with approved friends from RL.

Fortnite has a reputation for getting kids to buy cosmetics, but it isn’t justified. We’ve been playing for a year or so and my guy hasn’t asked to buy anything.

It’s very approachable, so your kid may be able to convince his friends to play too.

WetBeardHairs,

Yeah that’s already a staple

Lunar,

No Man’s Sky?

WetBeardHairs,

We actually tried it on gamepass and my son was only kind of interested. Thanks for the recommendation though

parpol,

To be honest, you’re probably better off letting your kid play whatever game they like, including garbage like roblox or diablo 4. Just make it very clear that no money will be spent on any microtransactions whatsoever and feed them the idea that spending real money is cheating.

tacosanonymous,

I agree with this. Roblox is huge and often how kids of an age socialize/play. Teach them why mtx aren’t okay, and protect yourself from having to pay.

Get them into some irl stuff too. DND group, sports, book clubs, etc.

Omega_Haxors, (edited )

On one hand it can be damaging to take away opportunities from kids, on the other hand roblox is massive groomer haven; I genuinely don’t think the kinds of connections they would make there would be worth the long term harm that may result for being involved in that shit.

Ultimately I think you did the right thing by banning it. You’re locking out like a 10th of their social life but those aren’t contacts they want.

WetBeardHairs,

Yeah we’re giving him and his friends alternative multiplayer games to have fun on with each other. It’s not like we’re killing his social circle - we’re just upgrading the forum.

XTL,

Do you know any of the friends’ parents? Maybe you can all gather some ideas together and have a more uniform policy on what’s banned and what might be fun alternatives.

WetBeardHairs,

That’s 100% the plan. The robloxocalypse occured as a joint venture between myself and the other parents.

parpol,

I can almost guarantee that banning the game will draw them towards playing it even more, and kids have all the time in the world to do so.

asg101,

RunEscape has a pretty expansive free to play game. Cartoonish gore.

WetBeardHairs,

God runescape is still a thing? I played that in middleschool…

PlasterAnalyst,

I think it's more popular in poorer countries because you don't need a high end PC to play it.

chaogomu,

I remember playing it a bit back in 2001.

And yes, it's still around.

There are even two versions that Jagex maintains, the main branch, and Old School Runescape, which is based around how the game was back in 2007-2009. (but with new stuff still added all the time)

WetBeardHairs,

Whoa that is a rabbithole I really should not let him know about. Talk about a time sink - people have been playing that for decades now.

YtA4QCam2A9j7EfTgHrH,

Sniper Elite Five is fun. It only has gore when you are shooting Nazis and it is always morally good to shoot Nazis.

WetBeardHairs,

Shooting nazis is acceptable. I’ll get him Wolfenstein one of these days when he’s a little older.

LeylaLove,

Is this what we’re doing instead of actually parenting? Roblox sucks, but you know what sucks even more? Being left out of the friend group because your parent is digging their heels in on some issue they can’t understand. Plus, where is the brightline for this? Would you ban your kid from playing Fortnite because of the skins? Counter strike when he’s older? Clash of clans?

You could play Roblox with him and explain what’s wrong with the games. You could help build his taste to not like the games that want to charge him out the ass and let him move past Roblox on his own. You can help him learn to make games and help him learn enough to want to move to something else. Otherwise, you’re just going to seem like an asshole. Because from reading this, you clearly just watched some video essay on Roblox and dug your heels in based on that.

WetBeardHairs,

Would you kindly fuck off? I am allowed to parent my children how I see fit. I provide him plenty of high quality games and multiple gaming systems and I want to make sure that his limited video game time is at least stimulating.

Nougat,

Pay no attention to the people who don't have kids. You're doing just fine. The fact that you're asking honestly makes you a better parent than many.

Kids, as you well know, are gonna figure out unimaginable ways to get themselves in trouble. I've had to tell more than one of my kids, "I'm gonna let you make all the mistakes you want, and I'm gonna be there to pick you up, but I am not going to let you make permanent mistakes." When it comes to advertising, microtransactions, OnlyFans (yes, OnlyFans), the lesson is "these things exist for one purpose, and that is to separate you from your money as much as possible." If you are paying for something, stop and consider whether you can get a substantially similar thing for free, or at least for a lot cheaper.

From reading your other comments, it sounds like you and the other parents all agreed together to drop the hammer on all the kids at once. That is a good idea, and it's great that you have lines of communication open to your kid's friends' parents. That's going to be important when they're older and driving cars, and having access to intoxicants and mall ninja shit.

To your actual question - I saw someone mention Minecraft, that is a fantastic choice. There are "skins" and shit that can be bought, but the game itself it absolutely fully playable and enjoyable without anything beyond the initial game purchase. Running a private server is pretty easy, and I would recommend it, so that the friend group always has a place they can go where the annoyances of the internet-at-large are excluded. Besides that, a kid who is motivated to modify his own Minecraft server is going to be driven to figure out how to do it, and that kind of skill will be super useful for oh so many things throughout life.

If they like arena combat games, Crossout is pretty fun. World of Tanks is okay, but the grind curve is steep. War Thunder is fun for planes and ships, but I am not a fan of their tank play mechanics. All of those are free to play, yes you can buy stuff, but you absolutely do not have to.

There's a single player game that I have to mention: The Long Dark. Winter survival, and there's also a storyline mode. The storyline is really good, and the map is absolutely vast. While it's not one they would be able to play together, it's a great exploration and survival game, and I would be remiss if I didn't point it out.

WetBeardHairs,

The Long Dark is brutal.

GarbageShoot,

You made the correct choice getting rid of Roblox and you don’t deserve to get flak for it, but

I am allowed to parent my children how I see fit

This is a shitty way to view the question. As someone with unique authority over the child, you are obliged to do your best at doing right be them.

“But I am!” you say

Then say that instead of this children-as-property shit

WetBeardHairs,

Why do you think I am not trying to be the best parent? Do you know my child? No? Then you don’t know what is best for them. In this case, it is the best. Roblox is garbage tier games on a platform made by exploitation of children for the exploitation of children. Just because I am man enough to call that out and make the tough decisions doesn’t mean people need to personally attack me for it. Dangers to our society evolve - it’s like slapping a crack pipe out of the hand of a family member… just digitally.

GarbageShoot,

This is a reading comprehension issue. Look at what I said more carefully, I am implicitly supporting the idea you are trying to help your kid and telling you to argue from a standpoint of human benefit rather than sovereignty. With the rise of Christian nationalism, we’re only going to see an uptick in “children are the property of the parent” style reasoning, and we should all be fighting it.

LeylaLove,

That’s what I’m more upset about. The logic behind these decisions that has been expressed simply isn’t sound parenting. This kid just got his favorite toy taken away, and while it isn’t meant as punishment, it will feel like punishment. The logic expressed in the post is regurgitated out of a video essay, and makes it sound like Dad doesn’t even know why he’s taking it away. My situation was a little bit different, adopting someone else’s kid who had an entirely different life before me, but I feel like the shock therapy of just banning it with video essay logic is weak even if they are fully your children. As someone who was on it as a kid, I don’t like Roblox overall. However, I’ve found just teaching him why I don’t like Roblox has been more effective than just pulling it away and giving a poorly thought out explanation why. Now he’s come to the conclusion of the emptiness of Roblox himself, I didn’t have to force it.

Kids are smarter than we give them credit for. Giving them the information on their level and giving them choice usually pays off with kids. They can usually understand way more than we expect them to as long as we can break it down for them. It’s one thing to be the weird kid who can’t play Roblox because your parents don’t want you to, it’s another thing to be the kid who just doesn’t want to play Roblox. I’m saying that this is a situation where you can have your cake and eat it too, and that’s by educating your kids to make good decisions and give them ample opportunity to practice that skill.

GarbageShoot,

The marketplace of ideas tends to be a much weaker force than “what are my friends playing?” I’m all for treating kids as people, but that also means understanding that people mostly choose what lets them get on with their peers the most easily.

LaGG_3, (edited )
@LaGG_3@hexbear.net avatar

You were asking for advice, and she gave you some solid suggestions. IDK why you’re getting so bent out of shape.

Edit: Adding this article to maybe give you some more detail. Play the game with your kid and see what about it they enjoy. If you want to introduce them to better games, you’ll need to have an idea about what they like.

WetBeardHairs,

Is this what we’re doing instead of actually parenting?

No, that wasn’t advice. That was judgemental and without cause. I am asking for game suggestions because this isn’t meant as a punishment - it is meant to let the kids have an upgrade. But I guess I didn’t tiptoe around everyone’s overly sensitive feelings over here.

LaGG_3,
@LaGG_3@hexbear.net avatar

You gave absolutely no context about what kinds of things your child enjoys in video games. Go figure that out first. If you don’t know that, and you’re taking the game he enjoys away he’s 100% going to see it as a punishment.

WetBeardHairs,

Thanks for presuming I don’t know what my kid enjoys. Why do you have to be such a dick with the personal attacks? I am asking for advice on multiplayer games. You’re being a dick. I bet you make a lot of friends that way.

LeylaLove,

You know what’s more stimulating than any individual game you’ll have him play? Making his own choices on what to play. And like I said, brightline, what is and isn’t stimulating to you? Are shitty flash games banned for being too simple minded?

Parenting is your kid learning from you. They’re not learning why you’re banning Roblox, and if you explain it to them they don’t really understand. My kid is starting to not fuck with Roblox anymore because of how pay to win some of the games are. He had to do a lot of chores for those Robux and instantly wished he had the money for better things a couple days later when he wanted a plushie at the store. When I told him he could have gotten that plushie if he hadn’t gotten Robux, he stopped wanting Robux. He learned the value of money, and learned to prioritize the things he wants, and coincidentally doesn’t want to play Roblox like he used to. I didn’t have to be the bad guy because most kids have things they want more than Robux. All I had to do was make him choose.

Seriously, download and play Roblox with him. There are a million different games on there, you can even filter games on the site. Some of the games are actually really fucking good. Meet him where he’s at, set rules so he has to play Roblox with you. You can actually monitor what he’s playing and doing, while getting in some bonding time. Because your Dad playing tag or whatever dumbass things we were into as kids was way usually way cooler than playing Dad’s game. You’re going to be

520, (edited )

I don't think you quite understand how bad Roblox is.

Think of the most predatory games you can imagine.

Roblox is far fucking worse.

Not only is it a money grubbing game like the worst of mobile free-to-play games, it encourages content creators to exhibit the same behaviours and does nothing about blatant fraud on the platform. Something it's money obsessed nature actually encourages and rewards.

If the shit that goes on in Roblox went on in Facebook to nearly the same degree, Meta would be raked over the coals for it; even Meta haven't stooped so low.

BaroqueInMind,
BaroqueInMind avatar

The next step is becoming a better parent. That's a shit move and you can't stop your kid from playing it behind your back. You simply taught them to find and learn new ways to gaslight and evade you in order to keep playing with their friends.

I guarantee your parents did the same shit to you, and you perpetuate that toxicity.

Nougat,

Says the person with no kids.

BaroqueInMind,
BaroqueInMind avatar

How many kids do you have?

Nougat,

Three more than you.

BaroqueInMind,
BaroqueInMind avatar

How old are they?

Nougat,

Why?

BaroqueInMind,
BaroqueInMind avatar

Wondering what kind of parent you may be. Read through your post history and you sound sane and competent up until approximately minutes ago.

Nougat,

I am large, I contain multitudes.

Chozo,
Chozo avatar

You sound like exactly the kind of kid who needed his Xbox taken away.

datendefekt,
@datendefekt@lemmy.ml avatar

Gaslighting, toxicity, oh come on. I’m supposed to expect my kid to lie to me?

Just giving my kids into the embrace of peer pressure isn’t love, it’s evading confrontation. Give them a place of trust and understanding, with clear rules they can understand and follow. If my kids are getting their way bending and evading the rules we set, then it’s way too late.

We often say yes, but sometimes we have to say no, and our kids are fine with that.

pivot_root,

You’re a shit parent if you let your kid play Roblox.

A point could be made about a video game that isn’t actively preying on kids, but Roblox ain’t it.

can,

The answer is whatever his friends are playing.

WetBeardHairs,

Coincidentally they got banned from Roblox at the same time! One of them dumped $50 in an afternoon on the game then had the audacity to ask for more money. So his whole social circle got booted from that cesspit on the same day. Me and their parents are trying to find good substitutes.

can,

This is some good context. I’m not too familiar with roblox but I understand it’s more of a platform than a single game. How are they accessing microtransactions? If that can’t be prevented than that’s a bigger problem.

WetBeardHairs,

From my understanding, that kid was given an apple giftcard so it didnt actually hit his parent’s credit cards. I monitor my kid’s microtransactions and I give him opportunities to earn money he can use for microtransactions of his choosings.

schmidtster,

Wait so you let them use the money how they wanted and now you’re mad at them for spending it how they wanted and how you told them…?

That’s a fucked up lesson and a half, you clearly didn’t learn your lesson and are now teaching the kid they will be punished for following instructions.

Well fucking done.

WetBeardHairs,

My kid didn’t do the microtransaction fuckup. He just got addicted to a shitty game that me and his friends’ parents also hated. One of his friends burnt a pile of cash which instigated all of us saying that it is time to end it. I mentioned this several times now in the thread.

schmidtster,

Yeah you mentioned the kid spent their gift card how they wanted with permission from their parents, and you do the same thing, and is now being punished for it. Thats shitty parenting, you’re not banning them because they spent a little money.

This was just the excuse you needed, be a better parent and don’t make up shit.

WetBeardHairs,

deleted_by_moderator

    •
    schmidtster,

    You started you post off just making fun of the game, we know your biased intent here.

    You said a kid blew a gift card, and you let your kid spent money on microtransactions already. This is called a parallel, you don’t seem to comprehend you let your kid already do this as well…. What difference does the game make? You already let it happen, fornite, Roblox, Minecraft no difference. Yet you took offense to one single game.

    The issue here is your parenting, it has nothing to do with the game, you said it yourself lmfao.

    WetBeardHairs,

    deleted_by_moderator

    •
    Kyatto,
    @Kyatto@leminal.space avatar

    That other commentor is a child or clearly never grew up. The internet is definitely not the same as when I was younger, kids don’t have the understanding of money or knowledge of predatory psychological techniques that are used to make vulnerable people, or children, part ways with what they have earned.

    You sound like a great dad who’s taking an interest and involvement in your kids hobbies and I love that. There needs to be some sort of course, or game would probably be better, designed to teach children about the sort of things we see these days.

    Personally I’m pretty susceptible to that sort of stuff so I use adblock and try to shy away from gacha type things. Microtransactions are hell.

    520,

    Roblox is a money-grubbing cesspit filled with manipulation. Even if you do close off the MTX route, it opens the door for someone to send a virus and say it'll get you free Robux (the Roblox in-game currency)

    xaxl,

    That kid is now known as the kid who got Roblox banned among their group of friends, not a nice thing to known for. This will be seen as a punishment by them regardless of how you frame it especially once the other kids at their school become aware of it.

    Ouch. Good luck navigating this one as your kids get older.

    datendefekt,
    @datendefekt@lemmy.ml avatar

    I’m not so sure about that. My kids had other kids in their class playing Fortnite - in second grade!

    And if my kid were 10 and all his friends were playing Diablo IV or GTA my answer would be a steadfast no.

    520,

    Minecraft is pretty good for this kind of stuff, especially Java Edition (has mods, and loooooads of servers, some of which also use mods to drastically alter the gameplay. You can also host your own, free of charge).

    WetBeardHairs,

    Yeah I prefer the java version, myself. But my kid doesn’t have a pc just yet - he’s limited to consoles and ipad for now.

    pacoboyd,

    If you want to get them something low level cheap, AMD small form factor pcs with integrated Radeon can be had for cheap (easily under $200 if you are patient). One of my kid plays on one of these and with a few performance mods on minecraft does 30fps just fine.

    WetBeardHairs,

    Even raspberry pi 4/5 are amazingly capable of playing minecraft 1080p. I wonder how much better linux gaming support there is on those now since the steamdeck has been a success…

    popcap200,

    I’m still confused as to why you guys don’t just ban the spending of money on micro transactions and not the game itself? Every game is jam PACKED with mtx these days, from CoD to Fortnite to Forza.

    JamesBean,
    JamesBean avatar

    Every *multiplayer game

    I play about a hundred games a year, and haven't opened a game with microtransactions in about half a decade.

    Carnelian,

    My squad has been addicted to Phasmophobia since Halloween, no microtransactions in sight!

    WetBeardHairs,

    Lol I think survival horror might be a few years too early for him and his cohorts

    Carnelian,

    It builds character! Lol but, yeah phasmo is too intense for many of my adult friends, even.

    Out of curiosity, do you generally know what he was doing on Roblox? I’ve heard of several horror games being remade within Roblox, such as Iron Lung. I’ve wondered what the limitations are. I definitely remember stumbling into some intense things when I was around that age, but the landscape is so different now

    WetBeardHairs,

    He was wasting time playing shitty games because his other friends played those same shitty games. I was taken aback at how mind numbingly shitty those games were. We were in the same room as an Xbox with gamepass and a Nintendo Switch and he chose to play some seriously bad games instead because his friend was addicted to it. Then he became addicted to it. Luckily, that whole friends group will now have much, much better games to play.

    the16bitgamer,
    @the16bitgamer@lemmy.world avatar

    peer pressure. I fell for it in my TF2 days in high school. A buck there a few bucks there, all for a hat with particle effects that I never got. All because one of my friends I was playing with had one, and I wanted one too.

    I learned a valuable lesson, but I was also 15/16 and had the ability of self reflection (and wanting to get Skyrim for $5 instead of a key). Can’t expect this level of self control from most teenagers, let alone a 10 year old.

    moody,

    Roblox is well-known for predatory practices aimed at children, and predatory behavior from other users who may or may not be looking for children to abuse.

    Banning Roblox entirely seems like a very reasonable thing to do IMO.

    WetBeardHairs,

    Personally, I want my kid to be able to buy a few things every now and then. Roblox got the axe for multiple reasons - mtx was only one aspect. He gets a vbuck or two with his allowance if he wants to earn them. It helps him get a healthy view of how little mtx are really worth, but a cosmetic here or there is kind of fun.

    popcap200,

    Oh duh. Also, I forgot you said it was because you didn’t feel the gameplay/game itself was quality enough, which is fair enough, but I’m not too familiar with Roblox as I’ve never played it.

    JamesBean, (edited )
    JamesBean avatar

    At that age, maybe Among Us or Minecraft?

    WetBeardHairs,

    Those are already commonly played by him and his friends, so you were right to suggest them.

    magnetosphere,
    magnetosphere avatar

    For a second I confused Among Us with The Last of Us. I thought that was a pretty messed up suggestion for a little kid lol

    NaibofTabr,

    For everyone saying OP should let their kid play Roblox and just ban spending money… just no.

    Roblox exploits child labor for profit and they have terrible scummy business practices. If you have even marginal ethical qualms about child labor and/or capitalistic exploitation of vulnerable people, you should be keeping yourself and your family away from Roblox. In your mind they should be in the same category as multilevel marketing, crypto scams and door-to-door religion peddlers.

    WetBeardHairs,

    Roblox really is the lowest of the low.

    NaibofTabr,

    I actually think it’s fair to call them child predators. They’re exploiting kids for money instead of sexual gratification, but it’s the same power dynamic. Child exploitation is their business model.

    Omega_Haxors,

    A lot of sexual child exploitation goes down there too, so you don’t even need a roundabout definition of child abuse.

    nilloc, (edited )

    My son just turned 6 and I was thinking of looking at the game (he really likes actual Lego, and his buddies are into Minecraft and Roblox), but another parent at a bday party a few weeks back asked if we played, and then warned my that I needed to keep a close eye on it, because the suggested games algo was pushing really sketch things to his daughter.

    So I started looking and decided the shopping aspect was something I didn’t want to expose him to yet. But these revelations are making me glad we haven’t yet used it and never will.

    piyuv,

    Do you have written sources for these? I’d like to educate myself but I can’t stand YouTube videos.

    ferralcat,

    This guy’s argument would literally be that Mario maker is encouraging child labor because it doesn’t pay kids who make levels in it.

    GalaxyBrain,
    @GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net avatar

    Considering the newest Mario game got a shitload of ideas from Mario maker levels, anyone who was good at mario making enough to be creative with the formula had their labor stolen as RnD for Wonder

    ZeroHora,
    @ZeroHora@lemmy.ml avatar

    Roblox sells the idea that you can actually make money with it, it has its own economy with job hunting and salaries. Mario Maker is just a community game.

    ICastFist,
    @ICastFist@programming.dev avatar

    That’s an entirely different thing, because Mario Maker doesn’t lure anyone with the bait of financial gain.

    clearleaf,

    That’s horrible. These 10 year olds are learning programming and game design skills for nothing. Good thing THAT was nipped in the bud.

    NaibofTabr,

    This is addressed directly in the linked videos. Development for Roblox doesn’t translate outside of Roblox.

    ICastFist,
    @ICastFist@programming.dev avatar

    Nearly everyone knows a bunch of skills “for nothing” or, worse, for fun! Gasp! Shocking, isn’t it?

    Also, did you know that modding is a thing at least since the 90s? You know, people that made modifications to games without expecting any financial return or job opportunities? People must be crazy if they’re putting so much effort just to have fun and share it, amirite?

    clearleaf,

    I couldn’t stop myself from being sarcastic there, sorry. The utter cynicism struck me so hard I didn’t know where to begin explaining how wrongheaded I think people are being about that. I would for sure prefer Roblox not encourage mtx so much but sheesh man. I don’t think Timmy is trying to make the next Genshin Impact.

    AOCapitulator,
    @AOCapitulator@hexbear.net avatar

    it would be if the word literally meant figuratively or mario maker psychologically tortured children into spending cash for the privilege

    NaibofTabr,

    Intent makes a big difference. The value of Roblox as a platform and as a business is based on the work done by children to develop for it, and it was set up that way on purpose. They created an incentive model to encourage it.

    Nintendo’s value as a company is not based on kids creating Mario Maker levels, nor does Nintendo push kids to do so with the promise of earning money.

    LemmyIsFantastic,

    This guy’s video could just as well be about foss development. Nearly every point has a direct parallel.

    NaibofTabr,

    Nobody dangles a carrot of earning money in front of potential FOSS developers. Nobody goes into FOSS thinking they’re going to get a big payout.

    FOSS is not pay-to-play. There’s no equivalent to Robux for FOSS developers.

    FOSS developers are consenting adults who volunteer their time for freely distributed software projects, not kids creating content for a video game company that charges them for access and then makes a profit from their work.

    Cagi,

    Fall Guys, Among Us, Totally Reliable Delivery Service. These games are full of shenanigans 10 year olds love.

    WetBeardHairs,

    Totally Reliable Delivery Service

    Thanks for that one. I hadn’t seen it yet. I bet they’d have fun with it.

    Cagi,

    Also Goat Simulator.

    Aatube, (edited )
    Aatube avatar

    Please don’t make people play fall guys anymore. Epic has run that thing into the ground by laying off most of their creative team and basically deleting levels and over-monetizing cosmetics

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