Apytele

@Apytele@sh.itjust.works

I love genuine questions and people putting in the effort to love and understand each other better. If you come at me just wanting to argue I’m going to troll you back. FAFO.

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Apytele,

No, sorry!

Apytele,

No, sorry!

Apytele,

Say We Can Fly - Sand Castle

Apytele,

I keep meaning to. Tbh you’re doing a lot better than me, I usually fizzle out on this kind of thing within a few days.

Apytele,

The gym isn’t a bad place to meet girls, but I wouldn’t cold approach them for the most part or assume any who do talk to you want a relationship.

My best advice is that if you really like the gym and fitness, take a class at the gym that is likely to have more women in it, like yoga or a dance class. Do try to pick something you actually are kind of interested learning more about, though. It’ll give you something else to focus on and take the pressure off trying to meet people. It’ll also make you look better as a potential partner if they can personally watch you working hard at learning something.

Apytele,

Don’t stop believing - journey

How do people actually dumpster dive to get free food? Are there any other cheap/free ways like this to get food?

My local food bank can only provide 8 packages with referrals every time before you run out, and I have, but my situation hasn’t improved financially due to various set backs and I’m struggling to feed myself. I’ve heard that supermarkets throw out massive amounts, but have never been in a position where dumpster diving...

Apytele,

I would start by observing the places around you that serve food. Stop by 30 minutes to an hour before close and see when and where they typically throw things out and what condition the food is still in.

Apytele, (edited )

I’ve never understood why people on the internet feel the need to express their deviant sexual preferences on threads like these, IVAGINAL only.

Yes, I’m being facetious.

Apytele, (edited )

We just don’t say it aloud for the most part because it sounds like one of those new weirdly specific kinks.

Apytele, (edited )

Isn’t this what lemmit was for?

I tried making a c/curatedreddit but it never really took off. c/curatedtumblr is going pretty good though.

Apytele,

Even disregarding the misgendering aspect, the fact that anon thinks it would ever be ok to tell any person “hey I’m pretty sure I know what your genitals are even though you wouldn’t want me to” at any time is just… fascinating.

Apytele,

Oh hey they taught me what to tell you in nursing school! And I’m a psych nurse so I can also give tips on not going bonkers! These are all for the average person that doesn’t have any specific reason they shouldn’t do any of these; like certain gastrointestinal disorders would contraindicate the dietary fiber.

  • Get plenty of low impact exercise like biking or swimming to keep your heart healthy but avoid fucking your joints.
  • Eat a balanced diet that’s low in processed or added sugars and high in lean protein, polyunsaturated fats (usually liquid at room temperature), and especially dietary fiber. When you talk Paleolithic diet vs the modern diet, the biggest difference is almost always roughage/fiber. Whole wheat bread might not taste as good but your colon needs the scrubbin’
  • practice good sleep hygeine. This means setting a big as possible of a difference in location, behavior, and sensory input between wakey time and sleepy time. So when you’re awake, hang out in a different area, look at different things, listen to different sounds and music, apply a different smelly lotion or keep a different essential oil near you (one of the few things essential oils are actually really good for is pavlovian conditioning yourself to get more relaxed or more alert). Also have different clothes you wear to be alert vs asleep and if you drink coffee in the morning, drink a completely differently tasting herbal tea at night. Create separate and distinct sensory environments for yourself for different contexts in general: they’ll help keep your subconscious in sync with what you’re consciously trying to accomplish.
  • either a) be religious and attend services regularly or b) choose a different social ritual to engage in and form close enough bonds with those people that they will come find and help you if you suddenly stop showing up. The mental health benefits of religion go far beyond feeling spiritually connected to the world. For a lot of people their religion is their primary social support, so if you’re not religious that’s completely valid but for optimal mental wellness you need to engage in some kind of activity that will allow a similar long term bond to form with other people. The advatage to doing this with religion is that its easier to tell people they have to come back or they’ll go to hell than to explain that not engaging in regular low-key social interaction will increase their risk of dementia in like 30+ years.
  • Don’t do meth or fentanyl, and be very very careful with alcohol. Weed is less bad for you than alcohol but tbh a light mauling from a black bear is also probably less bad for you than several years of high alcohol intake. “Safer than alcohol” is not high praise. If weed starts giving you anxiety or frequently seeing/hearing things others don’t, stop the weed immediately.
Apytele,

yes all good as well

Apytele,

I set mine to an innocuous background sound that only I will recognize like something small clattering on the floor or a small creaking noise. Its like a gun silencer, instead of making it silent you just make it sound like something else.

I have also found it important to either control which apps can send me notifications or control which apps are on my phone in the first place.

How should I change my polite behavior to be more accommodating?

My parents raised me to always say “yes sir” and “no ma’am”, and I automatically say it to service workers and just about anyone with whom I’m not close that I interact with. I noticed recently that I had misgendered a cashier when saying something like “no thank you, ma’am” based on their appearing AFAB, but...

Apytele,

I used to specifically work all-male forensics. The intricacies of social structure asking criminally insane men can be somewhat complex, but sir (and now that I work coed sometimes ma’am) goes a lot farther than you’d think. It also helps to start every shift by walking into the dayroom and saying “good evening gentlemen! How’s everybody doing tonight?”

Apytele,

Why is there water in rivers?

Apytele,

They’ll have to reverse the results soon: “we know you’re a bot because no human would ever be able to make sense of that!”

Apytele,

Fun fact: this is exactly what’s happening in Healthcare right now! I feel like every other week I have to explain basic concepts to my newer coworkers, and it’s not even their faults because admin is basically having them all train each other. Most new nurses these days are lucky to be trained by another nurse who has more than a full year of experience. And the resident doctors make all kinds of mistakes literally just because residency is basically hazing to the extent that they force them to work back to back to back nights vs days without adequate time to shift their circadian rhythms properly, so they’re relying on a new nurse trained by a slightly less new nurse to catch errors by a doctor who is also relatively new but most importantly has gotten 2 hours of sleep out of the last 72. I highly recommend getting in shape and wearing your seatbelt because whoever you think is going to save you after you get catapulted across 3 lanes of a crowded highway is becoming more likely to just kill you faster and more painfully every year.

Apytele,

I keep saying it would fix a lot of problems if police officers had to get (at least) an associates, ideally a bachelor’s and have to pass a board exam like nurses do. Make them have to buy license insurance like nurses do to defend you to your licensing board and that will start costing too much once you start having a sketchy record. It’s a (similar) level of responsibility (less power over their health, more power over their life).

I bring this up because they hammer into nurses that when patients start doing sketchy abusive shit to us (like yelling/hitting/throwing things and demanding we wash their genitals when they can do it themselves) you start documenting every time they so much as look at you funny so a) you can defend yourself and your license if you need to and b) so that the patient is more likely to face consequences for their shitty behavior.

It’s all about that paper trail and PD is not good at documentation ime. I won’t say my documentation is always perfect but if I knowingly tried to cover something up like the cops often do I would be caught immediately and completely screwed six ways to Sunday. If I turned off the unit cameras before giving shots or something I’d be lucky to ever work again. It felt like 50% of nursing school was just instilling a primal fear of the many regulatory agencies that exist within the Healthcare system. They really need a lot more fear.

Apytele,

Deep down I know you’re not wrong but I poke little crescents in my palms every time I see an abusive person describe their victim as a narcissist. Especially when they’re twice as old.

Apytele,

www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRq_SAuQDec

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