@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

followingfloss

@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com

Sometimes a sex blogger. So it does get spicy here but all NSFW will be content marked 🌶️
A fan of nude, rude & lewd photography and words (consensually only of course - no surprises thanks 😱).
Queer 🏳️‍🌈 Bisexual 💗💜💙
Loved up with Mr F ❤️‍🔥
I like to talk about cats a lot 🐾 Rey & Kylo are my feline overlords 🐈‍⬛
New to crochet but OBSESSED
Mama also to 12 & 2 (not their ages we named them this at birth 😝)
See my about info for links to more hot Floss action 🔥

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followingfloss, to random
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

We've put our Xmas tree up! The biggest one I've ever had! As usual it's absolutely chaotic and doesn't look remotely like the elegantly decorated trees I seem to see friends and family sharing. I feel like I'm the only person who can't make their tree fancy 😬 but does it really matter because the cats (well cat, it will be Kylo) will probably pull it down tonight anyway!

Cats Pull GIF

followingfloss, to random
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

My Spotify wrapped makes me realise I'm not listening to music much and I'm really not mixing it up much at all and I am quite possibly stuck in the 90's (the exception being my most listened to artist & that's my anti-anxiety music) 😬

followingfloss, to random
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

It's bloody cold out, I've got period cramps, don't want to spend any money until payday on Friday so today's plan is to stay in, be warm, drink tea and crochet! That's it! No more, maybe less 😅

18+ ht_honey, to random
@ht_honey@kinkyelephant.com avatar

Personally, I think I am gorgeous today.

followingfloss,
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@ht_honey agreed ⭐

followingfloss, to random
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My eldest has got his first ever detention, it was bound to happen because there are so many rules that are easy to slip up on. I don't care about the detention but the things I worry about are 1) if it's a mistake & he's out at 3pm & I'm not there (only day he's forgotten his phone) 2) he's worried I won't know & will be getting upset 3) he's getting upset in case I'm mad & 4) it's for lack of achievement as a consequence of his dyslexia & I'll have to get ready for battle 😭

followingfloss,
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I'm really hoping it's for something totally ridiculous like his shirt was untucked. Or he forgot his pencil case. He's only been there two weeks I don't want to have to start fighting his teachers just yet 😅

followingfloss,
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

He forgot his reading book. Which he doesn't even read. They don't check if he reads but everyday he has to have it anyway. He wasn't worried. Him & his mates found the whole thing hilarious because as the new kid it's the first day he was eligible for detention & he got one! He hasn't even had a warning up until now. The detention teacher is apparently lovely & he got loads of homework done. So the only person who had anxiety over it was me 🙈 which sounds about right 😬

followingfloss,
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

@autoerot1ca yeah forgotten book, wonky tie, blazer off, all sorts on the naughty list now. I'm all for having some structure but I was a good kid in school, responsible, good work ethic, never intentionally causing trouble but with the rules in places now I'd have had a lot more than my record of zero detentions 😬 & his school isn't even ridiculous with the rules, but still way above what I think is needed, so I just teach him to be sensible & respectful & try & help him out where I can.

followingfloss,
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

@ht_honey thank you 💜 I will definitely bear that in mind. So far that's not the case & hopefully it never will be, luckily he doesn't feel like he's had any issues yet regarding his dyslexia, but I'm always ready to go into action over it just in case.

followingfloss,
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

@MPBJulie Fingers crossed 🤞 I definitely won't forget to remind him about it now, I'll add to my list of 'have you got ...'

robyneatseverything, to random
@robyneatseverything@mastodon.social avatar

The sexiest thing on my Christmas list is a new frying pan.

followingfloss,
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

@robyneatseverything nice! I actually love useful stuff for presents. I've asked for an rechargeable screwdriver 😅 and that's not a euphemism 🙈

followingfloss, to random
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

Today I opened a new box of tea. That might be the high point of my day today and that's not because my day will be shut, but opening a new box of tea is so satisfying and joyful that it's hard to beat 😅🫖

Tea Spill The Tea GIF

18+ ht_honey, to random
@ht_honey@kinkyelephant.com avatar
followingfloss,
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@ht_honey what a delightful image 😍 just the thing to brighten up this rainy grey Sunday.

followingfloss, to random
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I'm feeling annoyed & I don't know why, so instead of moaning about that I'm going to tell you about Vera. I'm terrible with plants. They always die despite my best efforts, even the easy ones people say anyone can look after. It probably didn't help that my old flat was cold, dark and damp. Despite the odds though Vera is almost three! We got her for Xmas 2020 & she was weeny but now she's big & still alive! I retrieved her today from my old flat & felt awful at forgetting her! 😭

followingfloss,
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

I appreciate she probably isn't the finest specimen of Aloe Vera you've ever seen, but she's mine and she hasn't died on me yet, I'm hoping she goes from strength to strength in the new flat with more light and less hostile conditions. 🪴

followingfloss, to Cats
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followingfloss, to random
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I'm making the kiddo mittens and I've learnt a valuable crochet lesson. When doing two identical pieces maybe do the first few rows of each one after the other 😬 I now can't remember how I interpreted the instructions because the video skips weirdly so will have to hope for the best & fingers crossed they end up looking similar enough that if I do mess up no one sees! #crochetuk #CrochetAdventure

followingfloss,
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Mittens are finished! Resisting the urge to tell you how they're wrong 😅 instead I'm going to focus on the positive fact I made mittens! From scratch! And they're 80% tutorial & 20% me adding things on that made them better for the kiddo. Also even though it's not very defined because the colours were a bit too similar (mixed blue and solid blue) it's my first time at changing colours of yarn as I go. So counting this as a big win ⭐

followingfloss,
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@RomanticIsa thank you 😊 some other projects haven't turned out so well (wonky scarf I'm looking at you 😅) so I'm so happy these actually look pretty decent.

followingfloss,
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Matching scarf is in session! But tight at the bottom but I understand why which is another crochet win and it doesn't really matter because I'm going to put a pom pom on each end 🙂 #crochetuk #CrochetAdventure

followingfloss, to random
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So many people were baffled by us moving, or offended when we explain why 😬 but at my old local cash point, attached to the little Tesco, a woman was assaulted and robbed in broad daylight! We move two weeks ago tomorrow & that's probably the 6th story I've read about serious crime within a mile of my old house. I know everywhere has its problems, but seriously I think those statistics are reason enough to have moved away!

Crime Scene GIF

followingfloss, to random
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

Cats will never not be funny to me. Rey spent the weeks leading up to us moving being a bag of nerves. Stopped eating. Barely left our bedroom. Very subdued & just generally not herself. We've now been in our new flat for almost 2 weeks & she's turned into a total agent of chaos. It's hilarious. One of our internal doors leads downstairs into the restaurant Mr F is running. She is now fascinated with this door. If we don't end up chasing her around the restaurant one day I'll be amazed 🙈

followingfloss, to random
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

My eldest has never been sporty & I won't lie I wasn't sad about this. But in the last couple of years he's gotten into football & now rugby. I'm proud in many ways because he's worked very hard on improving his skills & he's actually pretty decent for a late starter. However, I don't love the fact I was cleaning his football boot as 6am 😂 he will learn to do it himself, but not until I can set him up to do it in a way that won't cover my kitchen in mud 😰

followingfloss, to random
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Well I've found my first annoying things about having moved! Trying to find the toddler a damn nursery space!! Holy moly shame I didn't know I'd be living here a year ago to get on the waiting lists 🙈 Feeling like a massive moron sending requests to places that are basically like 'er ... no, did you not apply sooner' no because I didn't live here 😭😭😭

followingfloss,
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

@Focusedandfilthy @ht_honey oh that's amazing that you gave people a better experience, not related to toddler groups, but I am going to see if there's a crochet group around here, maybe some of them will have kiddos & I can make us friends that way. Or at the library, we're going to join up there soon.

followingfloss,
@followingfloss@kinkyelephant.com avatar

Okay, so we've found some options, one being a childminder, who I'm trying to arrange a visit with but she's so damn chatty 😅 I find out more about people here in the first ten minutes of meeting then than I did about people back home in years of knowing them! I'm wondering if most of the UK is like this & Bournemouth is just miserable, or are Newbury folk just eager to share & find stuff out. Both myself & Mr F are baffled each day by the thing we get told or the questions were asked.

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