@dan@discuss.systems
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

dan

@dan@discuss.systems

Distributed systems, operating systems, networking research.

Principal Researcher, Microsoft Research; affiliate faculty, University of Washington.

But realistically: mainly cat photos, food and wine, and bad jokes.

I also administer https://discuss.systems/

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dan, to random
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

currently attempting to use an ethernet interface called "enp8s0f0npf0vf1" and cannot help but think

STATEMENTS DREAMED UP BY THE UTTERLY DERANGED

THEY HAVE PLAYED US FOR ABSOLUTE FOOLS

dan, to random
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I think my headphones are now 25 years old. Can't think of any other piece of technology that's lasted that long, let alone one that I still use regularly...

dan, to random
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

Now the proud owner of my very own zero-volume non-orientable surface!

dan,
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

@jonathankoren yup!

dan, to random
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

I have been thinking a lot about the old platinum-iridium International Prototype Kilogram since it was replaced 5 years ago this month.

I hope Le Grand K is enjoying its retirement. I hope it gets to live in the French countryside with a nice family who brushes it from time to time.

dan, to random
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

Please congratulate @sharon on her first paper acceptance at USENIX Security!

dan, to random
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For this one brief, glorious moment I have all of my calendars syncing correctly to the devices they're supposed to sync to.

I do not expect this to last more than a day.

dan, to random
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

Can't believe Seattle requires cats to be licensed, everyone knows that cats are libertarians*.

  • "convinced of their fierce independence while dependent on a system they don’t appreciate or understand"
dev, to random
@dev@discuss.systems avatar

Me, a year ago: I’m so glad they’re building high density housing right in downtown. Without the parking minimums, it’ll be perfect for students and transit, this kind of high density walkable urbanism is what’s needed.

Me, checking the status in a year: no, not like that

dan,
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@regehr @dev have never been convinced Nebraska is real

dan,
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

@dev @lzg @regehr this reminds me that the local PNW questionable taco chain used to sell tater tots as "Mexi-Fries"

They recently renamed them, because apparently the name was the offensive part here?

dan,
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

@dev @regehr @lzg funny you should mention that…

https://www.jsonline.com/story/life/green-sheet/2021/08/31/why-raw-meat-cannibal-sandwich-endures-what-the-wisconsin/7906831002/

dan,
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

@janeadams @regehr @dev oh, is that the place that angry people keep showing up at because when some IP geolocation service fails it just returns the geographic center of the US?

dan,
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@regehr @dave_andersen @dev @lzg also, I thought all animals in German were either subtypes of Baer or Schwein

lzg, to random
@lzg@mastodon.social avatar

@dev now that you work for microsoft, are you the entire family's MSoffice support guy?

dan,
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

@dev @lzg oh, hey, you're in an actual product group, that means you can answer all of my questions about Microsoft products

dan,
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@dev @lzg I just take care of anteaters.

https://discuss.systems/@dan/110708465167136445

dev, to random
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Just learned about two bit floats, want to use them,,,

dan,
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@dev meanwhile, in VHDL, booleans can have up to nine different values. That's twice as many as these floats!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IEEE_1164

dan,
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

@dev @kstatz12 @ricci one of @irene's first jobs at VMware was to replace every if statement with a switch to see if that made the code size smaller.

Narrator: it didn't.

dan,
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

@ricci @dev @kstatz12 @irene 20+ years ago, I read a webpage about object-oriented programming that said, without a hint of irony, "every if statement is a lost opportunity to use dynamic polymorphism" and that phrase has been living in my head since

dan, to random
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

I don't understand why everyone here isn't already talking about how James Mickens spent his sabbatical recording a metal album where all the band members are himself.

https://tentimesyourmaster.com/

skinnylatte, (edited ) to random
@skinnylatte@hachyderm.io avatar

I feel like I'd go back in time happily in Malaysia / Malaya to try to eat all the foods, now lost or changed, in the 50s.

I am not sure I would want to eat this other than as a joke.

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/making-and-eating-the-1950s-most-nauseating-jell-o-soaked-recipes?utm_source=pocket-newtab-en-us

dan,
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

@skinnylatte I inherited my grandmother's recipe book from that era, and occasionally I threaten to start cooking from it

dan,
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@skinnylatte Every recipe calls for either canned cream of mushroom soup or canned pineapple tidbits... and, in one case, both

skinnylatte, to random
@skinnylatte@hachyderm.io avatar

I feel Iike polyamory would be more attractive to me if it didn’t remind me so much of work.

dan,
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@skinnylatte whenever someone asks me what I'm working on and I don't feel like talking about work, I just tell them it's a new product called Teams for Polycules.

dan, to Seattle
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Really sad that the Living Computer Museum is still closed with no apparent plans to reopen — it was such a cool place to visit.

Apparently Paul Allen didn’t leave any plans to keep the museum running in his will.

https://seattlecollegian.com/paul-allen-living-computers-museum-remains-closed-after-years-despite-lifted-covid-restrictions/

TheNeedling, to random
@TheNeedling@newsie.social avatar

Cat on Leash as Weirded Out by This as You Are: https://theneedling.com/2024/04/06/cat-on-leash-as-weirded-out-by-this-as-you-are/

dan,
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

@TheNeedling feeling uncomfortably targeted here

kstatz12, to random
@kstatz12@discuss.systems avatar

Who else learned how to drive like this? Just reacting to a projector playing a video of someone else driving. I believe it was generously called a "simulator"

dan,
@dan@discuss.systems avatar

@ricci @kstatz12 @cross in a strange coincidence, my browser just recommended me an article about airsickness bag collectors ("baggists", they call themselves)

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