@reallybigfoot@ohai.social
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reallybigfoot

@reallybigfoot@ohai.social

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reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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Geez. I REALLY wanna have sex with the fattest Komodo Dragon that ever lived. High five.✋ #Bigfoot

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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A snowman just saw me walking on a ridge. Had to kill him. Wouldn't promise not to talk. I mean, that guy's dead. BIG TIME. Like, I've killed a lot of things, but that snowman is 100% dead.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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Wtf?! Wowzers!

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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I've heard the ability to make fire is important. I will prioritize fire above inventing the ganoosh, which I've been working on my entire life. The ganoosh would have enabled many shake uses, such as to shake it at birds to let them know I can't grab them but I hate them.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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The worst smack talkers are Frankensteins. They can rarely find the right words to say good smack, especially to dogs. OMG, dogs really have a hey-day in Frankenstein smackdowns.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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I want to make a tree formation, but I can't decide which tree to use. This is a freaking nightmare.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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I mind controlled a hog yesterday, and one of his oinks really backfired into my head. I can still barely concentrate.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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Jerksquatch told me I'm a human in a costume if I can stretch my hand across my entire face. I can't tell, though, because every time I try to check, he pushes my hand into my face. "STOP PUSHING MY HAND! MY HAND GOES INTO MY FACE, WHICH IS ANNOYING, & I CAN'T PERFORM THE TEST!"

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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My midsection makes me think of dinosaurs. Especially when I look at it fast.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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If you hold a rat, it will wiggle until you put it down. This is how I feel right now.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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I will invent the "kamaka-takata-ka-takata-tk-tkk-vavavavavavavavavavava" today. It will allow me to point at things the way a stick does. I think I will make it out of a stick.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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There is no such thing as a "fresh" Frankenstein corpse. Eat at your own risk. FYI.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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I'm waving at a Sasquatch in the distance, but he refuses to acknowledge me. This is getting awkward. "I'M NOT WAVING AT YOU! I'M WAVING AT...A HORSE...THAT...WILL BE THERE LATER!". Victory.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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Even when I say smart things, it's monkeytown x4 in my head.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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My feet have tremendous padding on the bottom. It's like monkeytown x4 down there. Not to mention my ding dong either.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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I hope I AM a human in a costume. But I seriously doubt it. <pinches his arm flesh> This thing feels pretty real.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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My scat tastes different than other scat. Not necessarily better, just different.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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I'm trying to appreciate flowers like a human. "HELLO FLOWERS. DIE. I APPRECIATE YOUR BEAUTY. I'M IN AWE LIKE A WEAKLING OMG I CAN'T DO IT YOU FREAKING FLOWERS!"

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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I just figured out numbers. When a human says, "There are 3 squirrels", he's saying "THERE are 3 squirrels". Like, "Hey, everyone, I found the squirrels", and the "3" part is just randomly said.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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All I need to speak good is to imprison an alien and a human. I reverse mind control the human's language center, and force the feed through the alien, who I've Hive Minded. Obviously, I got the idea watching ET use a Speak & Spell to communicate with space.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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My breath is coming out of my mouth like white firesmoke in the cold, and my facehair is covered in ice. In other words, I look very badass.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
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A Frankenstein is eating a live horse. There are many WTF whinnies being shouted right now. This is unusual.

reallybigfoot, to bigfoot
@reallybigfoot@ohai.social avatar

Dirty hairy

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