readbeanicecream,
readbeanicecream avatar

When they do not return the grocery cart to the cart corral.

TheArstaInventor, (edited )
TheArstaInventor avatar

I doubt you can judge someone as bad based off that

EDIT: I'm gonna go with better terms here: Not responsible enough and ignorant, I still don't believe someone can be considered bad as a person for this.

Wookie,

OP doesn’t put his cart back! Shame!

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

Wow, arguing another perspective (with a valid arguement) made me a victim, RIP

sin_free_for_00_days,

I find the people who judge others based on cart return status are the real assholes.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

Yeah I mean, I have seen people do that countless times at the walmart near my house for example, I feel like that's just calling a very high portion of the population to be bad people unfairly.

Gaybees,

Yea I mean just because a lot of people are doing something doesn’t mean it’s okay. And yea, I think a large portion of people (Americans especially) are bad people. I don’t think it’s unfair, if you can push a cart walking several miles up and down a Walmart supercenter, you can take an extra 2 mins to push it back to the corral. Or if there’s no corral, just take it back to the front of the store, its really not that hard.

theinspectorst,
theinspectorst avatar

I rarely see that and I definitely judge people when I do see it. Maybe you just live somewhere where anti-social behaviour is normalised?

harmonea,
harmonea avatar

Okay but....

There's really no reason not to unless you just give zero shits about the damage a loose cart can do.

That's exactly the kind of sign you want: it's a person who thinks "it won't affect me because I'm leaving, so it's not my problem."

RickRussell_CA,
RickRussell_CA avatar

Or maybe it's because I have a special needs child and I can't always leave them alone, even for a minute or two?

When you make snap judgments based on initial appearance, that's precisely the kind of error you can make.

harmonea,
harmonea avatar

What error, exactly? If someone makes a choice and doesn't take responsibility for that choice, there's no error in judgment calling that person irresponsible. Mitigating circumstances like a person's childcare situation are only mitigating circumstances because there was irresponsibility in the first place to mitigate. It's still irresponsibility. There was no error.

RickRussell_CA,
RickRussell_CA avatar

. Mitigating circumstances like a person's childcare situation are only mitigating circumstances because there was irresponsibility in the first place to mitigate. It's still irresponsibility.

I took the cart into the store to shop with my cognitively disabled child. This was a responsible decision.

Due to my child's medical disability and changing circumstances resulting in a behavior meltdown, I had to take him back to the car and stay with him, to prevent elopement that could put him and others at risk. This was a responsible decision. Due to the changing circumstances, I can't return the shopping cart to a particular location.

At no point do I abdicate responsibility. My first responsibility is to the safety of my child, and others who might suffer if he elopes. If you think I'm a bad person who "gives zero shits" because I put that first, then I call that error.

If you want to live in you self-righteous bubble and judge people from afar without knowing jack squat about their circumstances, I call that error. I'm sure my situation is not unique; issues must come up all the time with children, pets, the elderly that necessitate putting a shopping cart aside and attending to the needs of others, and it's not always possible to return the shopping cart.

I can't stop you from making an error, of course, but I'd hope than when the error is explained to you, you'd commit to avoiding it.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

If you want to live in you self-righteous bubble and judge people from afar without knowing jack squat about their circumstances, I call that error.

This is exactly what she/he has been doing here unfortunately.

idiomaddict,

Red flags aren’t always accurate. That’s the point, it’s a quick gut check, not a foolproof way to analyze someone’s worth. Your neighbor who stares too long and had red stains on his shirt could be a surgeon with myopia, but there are some red flags.

RickRussell_CA,
RickRussell_CA avatar

Then we should probably call it a "red flag" instead of a "dead giveaway" (per post title) :-)

idiomaddict,

To be fair, read the comments. There’s exceptions to all of them, because it’s impossible to draw a line about what only good people or bad people do. Was Oskar Schindler a bad man?

TheArstaInventor, (edited )
TheArstaInventor avatar

Actually as I was explaining to another person, unfortunately, there is a reason.

I am living in Tampa, Florida, the nearby walmart to my house, has a huge parking lot, but a car corral near the entrance and ONE on a huge damn parking lot.

The thing is, while I am not against returning carts when possible in anyway, what can I do if I park my car all the way on the other side on the parking lot and not near the cart corrosal? And the reason I park there is because it's one of the few parking spots available in a busy day? I am sorry but in such cases, people will just leave the carts on the side and leave with their car.

Not to mention, the damn sun here, it gets absolutely hot here at times, even I don't see myself walking halfway to the other part of the parking lot just to leave a cart when I already walked all the way from the entrance carrying all of my groceries, I don't see myself returning in that case.

Again we need to think in practical real-life scenario, so not only should people start returning carts, stores that don't have enough cart returning points in parking lots especially, should increase them.

I am not saying I don't return carts because that actually doesn't apply to me, atleast lately, as I have been mainly ordering stuff online mostly.

I do also want to make it clear, I am in no way giving justifications for those who make these basic mistakes without a genuine reason, I don't ever see myself not returning a cart when there is indeed a fairly nearby cart corrosal, and unfortunately, there are people who won't return their cars even if they have a nearby car corral, and i'm not arguing for them!

RandomStickman, (edited )
RandomStickman avatar

I've crossed a parking lot and a street in the snow to return it before. If I pushed it there I'm getting it back. Simple as.

TheArstaInventor, (edited )
TheArstaInventor avatar

Do you think it's fair to think that just because you are able to, others can too? I've been living in Canada before moving to florida, opposite weather here, extremely hot, I try to stay cool as much as possible, it's good that you "crossed a parking lot at a street" (assuming that is long distance, don't extactly understand the meaning here), but I am not you man, different people, scenarios, circumstances.

I know people are going to downvote this for me lol, again I ain't justifying for those who actually don't return when there is actually a cart corral nearby, but I am not trying to justify my own actions or argue for those who make this mistake without a genuine reason wantedly, in-fact as I''ve mentioned in several other comments in this thread, I do online shopping mostly these days, so this does not even apply to me.

I am simply trying to discuss from another not so popular perspective here in this thread.

I am also wondering if people have different definitions of what "bad" could be, because to me, this is more about lack of responsibility and ignorance when you are able to return a cart, but you still don't. If I saw someone doing this without a genuine reason like I have stated before, I don't think that'd still make them a bad as a person, I'd consider them not so responsible and kindly ask them to return it.

argues_semantics,

Just accept that this thing that you do is bad. Then be better.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

It's interesting how you assume I do it when I am not even exactly arguing for it, you people just can't seem to understand or deal with the fact that some stores out there don't have enough car corrals and practically in real-life out there, people are bound to do this if the stores aren't bothered enough to have enough cart corrals in a big damn parking lot.

Nobody will cross to the other half of the parking lot, especially if it's busy with moving cars, to return a cart, if we can't come to this agreement, those who have been downvoting me are being delusional in my opinion, remember, in my opinion.

And it's wrong to judge someone of doing that just because they are arguing from a different perspective, I am not even saying it's okay to do that when you do have a cart corral nearby, there are people who do that and don't return the cart even they do have a cart corral nearby, but expecting customers to do that even with the lack of cart corrals is nice to hear, but UNREALISTIC.

Maeve,

You said you do it, and why.

RandomStickman,
RandomStickman avatar

If they're physically able to push the cart somewhere they should be able to return it. Bar some edge cases I don't see why someone wouldn't return the cart.

I think you have stricter definition of bad and a looser definition of acceptable reasons. For me "not responsible" is bad, like a minute amount but still in the bad zone, and tough weather and distance isn't enough of a reason to not return the cart.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

The thing is, pushing the cart to take groceries to a car is a must for a person isn't it? The same can't be said for returning it, and while I respect a lot that you seem to have returned the cart every single time even if there is no nearby return spot, I don't see everyone being that way, especially when some stores barely have enough cart return spots on parking lots with PAID staff who are there to collect leftover carts.

If I am being honest, when I do physically grocery shop, in most cases since I mostly order online, when I really only have to, I do physical visit and I don't buy much, I just carry them with my hands to the car, I never had this issue lol.

RandomStickman,
RandomStickman avatar

I think a lot of people, me included, have been cart pushers or other similar minimum wage jobs so it's a bit emotionally charged. For me even if there are staff it's still not nice to pile work on them, you know? Like others in the thread said, I don't value my time more than theirs.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

I do understand where you are coming from, and I really hate to sound like that guy who wants the other to do the work for him, but unfortunately a few others (and I think I myself have done a not so great job at conveying what I am really trying to say here) have done a great job at making me sound like that.

What I am just saying is that it is unrealistic to expect that from the majority of the public customers from doing that if there is not enough cart corrals, this is bound to happen until stores take action to make cart returns a must, and add more cart return points in the parking lot for customers with cars.

Again I don't really oppose this, I support this in-fact, I am only saying that we have to address this issue in a way where we are not JUST blaming the people doing this (excluding those who do this despite having a nearby cart corral), we also need to consider the lack of cart corrals issue that some stores have realistically.

Other than that, I really don't want to be that guy who is irresponsible and lets the other guy do the work for him, but if I go do physical grocery shopping on a very busy day with moving cars in the parking lot, asking me to travel to the other side of the parking lot to return a cart seems a little bit unreasonable, and that's if the store is one of those that lack cart return points.

But if there is one near me or even in the next row or after that, I am more than happy to walk there and return the cart, really, I am just talking about stores that have barely cart carrols, and if they do, it's like, on the whole other side of the parking lot, you are basically walking back and forth from one side of the building to the other.

ElleChaise,

I actually took the five minutes to look at all 10 Walmart stores in Tampa on Google Earth, and I can see more than one cart corral from space... How are you missing them in person?

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

Sigh, I live near Tampa, I don't live there, not in the main city/area (outer part near to Tampa for added context. I don't think Ill give my exact location here though.

YeetPics,
@YeetPics@mander.xyz avatar

So if the cart corral was in you immediate vicinity you would bother to return it?

You could just carry the groceries through the store and not even use the cart at all…

harmonea,
harmonea avatar

Not to mention, the damn sun here, it gets absolutely hot here at times, even I don't see myself walking halfway to the other part of the parking lot just to leave a cart when I already walked all the way from the entrance carrying all of my groceries, I don't see myself returning in that case.

Lost me here, nope, nooooope nope nope nope. The weather is the least justifiable excuse -- Someone has to walk all that way to return that cart in the hot sun if you don't. If anything, making someone else do it is worse because of that weather.

I also saw you throwing out "but they have employees who do that" in another part of the thread. You wouldn't throw trash on the ground instead of walking it to a can just because a place has a janitor, I'm sure. It's exactly the same logic, and the reason you wouldn't ruin a janitor's day is the same reason you shouldn't ruin a cart collector's day.

I get that your local shop sucks for only having one corral. I really, truly do. But you know what I do when my closest store has practices I can't deal with? I don't make someone else clean up after me, I take my money elsewhere.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

Lost me here, nope, nooooope nope nope nope. The weather is the least justifiable excuse -- Someone has to walk all that way to return that cart in the hot sun if you don't. If anything, making someone else do it is worse because of that weather.

Interesting, you do realize the employee who collects the carts get them when the store closes, hence at night? It would make 0 sense to do that in the morning because customers will keep coming.

I also saw you throwing out "but they have employees who do that" in another part of the thread. You wouldn't throw trash on the ground instead of walking it to a can just because a place has a janitor, I'm sure. It's exactly the same logic, and the reason you wouldn't ruin a janitor's day is the same reason you shouldn't ruin a cart collector's day.

This is a very bad example and a comparison, why? If I have trash, even if there is not a garbage bin nearby, I can keep it with me until I find one or just take it with me to home and throw it there.

Now with carts, that's a whole different story, I wish there was a machine where it could carry it for me until I reach to the whole other side of the parking lot, in a very busy moving parking lot with cars, but such magical machine doesn't exist.

Companies like Walmart earn millions and billions of dollars, maybe they should be installing more cart return points as the customers are the people who are keeping them in business.

I get that your local shop sucks for only having one corral. I really, truly do. But you know what I do when my closest store has practices I can't deal with? I don't make someone else clean up after me, I take my money elsewhere.

I already countered the point that I am making someone else do that for me, because first of all, they are just doing their job, and I am not being disrespectful here, but even if you may be okay dealing with the inconvenience the lack of cart return points, I am not, you can't expect everyone to be okay with something just because you are.

Regarding taking my money elsewhere, that'd be travelling twice as much, which is dooable, I have a car, but that just makes 0 sense, i'm wasting double the time of mine, and there is no guarantee walmart has enough cart return points there too, considering another person said walmart has been removing them on california, if they are doing that there, then I don't expect it to be any better.

Also, asking me to do that for a damn cart, seriously? And the employee is just doing their job, they will do it anyways even if I go or not, and please, don't compare that again with trash, it's a whole different story, because you make it sound like I am the type of person who throws trash on the ground wantedly near a place where there is a garbage can, so I can watch the janitor pick it, that is crazy.

zzmthesurand,
zzmthesurand avatar

I know someone (in California, for added context) who works as a shopping cart collector at Target during open hours, so this isn’t the case everywhere.

harmonea,
harmonea avatar

I really don't have the desire to deal with this level of unhinge over carts, especially when most of it is self-contradictory, begging the question, and/or straight up incorrect.

If I was willing to meet you halfway with "just irresponsible, not bad" before, this response right here eliminated all that.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

I really don't understand you took this so seriously in the first place, and many of the arguments you made make 0 sense like that trash comparison, and the fact that you asked me to go somewhere else so what, I can return a cart? Or the fact that if I don't return the cart, I am making someone else do the work for me when some stores have people PAID TO DO THAT, because they lack cart return points, and how I am making them do it for the same reason I don't want to: climate, when they wouldn't even pick up carts from parking lots till night.

Not to mention how me returning would mean that employee's will be free from getting the carts until that is not true, because people are bound to just let the carts on the sides if the store did not bother to make return points, and literally have someone ready to pick them up at the end of the day, which tells me even they ARE NOT bothered from the store. Even if I stop, that wouldn't matter a bit if others didn't do the same, there are tons of people living nearby, and customers are bound to do this if the store doesn't give proper return points, this is reality.

Man, that's just a whole other level of insanity, glad you can't deal this argument anymore because I am really not interested in this either.

If you think this is bad or irresponsible given a genuine reason, then you haven't really seen the real irresponsible and bad things out there in the world, because this is nothing...

There was once in walmart a year back when they asked us to return the carts properly because it was too windy outside so it won't hit properly

AND WE DID RETURN THE CARTS IN THAT SCENARIO

Again, I find this funny, you sound like an absolute perfect person who wants everyone to be extremely responsible and do it despite inconveniences i've mentioned above...

Look, it's nice to hear that, but in the real practical world, people WILL leave their carts if stores are not bothered or care enough to install return points in the first place.

Come out of your delusional world, seriously.

Maeve,

“Nobody else’s time, wants, needs or desires couldn’t possibly matter more than mine. Because I think and feel this way, no one else feels thinks differently.”

harmonea,
harmonea avatar

that's just a whole other level of insanity

glad you can't deal this argument anymore

If you think [...] then you haven't really seen

Incidentally, I've got another measure for when someone is probably a bad person. Someone else in this comment section said it, so I'll quote and link.

they get angry with you for enforcing your boundries.

Now, see, that up there was me enforcing my boundaries, and you hauled off and insulted my sanity and made all kinds of assumptions about my life experience. Painted yourself into a corner on this one, my dude.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

Please don't take this in a different direction against me lol, I am only calling this discussion and your arguements as "insansity" like the trash comparision you made that makes no sense to me, I obviously don't even know you personally, so that no way was mean't to apply for you, just the arguement and some of those points you put forth.

I didn't mean or never called you as a person as insane lol

Good job trying to shift it that way though

TheArstaInventor, (edited )
TheArstaInventor avatar

And it's funny how you left out 90% of my arguements, cherry picked them as per your liking and highlighted them against me.

EDIT: And I just realized you have been cherry-picking since the very beginning, leaving a lot of the good points I put forth, only highlighting some points alone like the weather, making it seem like I am being ridiculous with excuses, although I had a bigger context behind it.

You also said: "I don't really have the desire to deal with this...."

Yet you can't put a full stop and try to understand another perspective rather than your own, you seem to have a very locked and closed mindset, atleast from having this conversation although that may not be the case.

But you need to understand, it's nice to speak like a very responsible person, expecting everyone to be that way, I admire that, but the reality is, people won't go to another store and find a place with huge cart corrals just to be able to return it (I am saying this as you wanted me to take my money elsewhere), that's just not practically possible and it simply isn't convenient out there in the real world,

nobody is going to travel somewhere else that could be much further away just to be able to return a cart, I bet it's not even something people think off when they go do grocery shopping, you have to be considerate when demanding people to be more "responsible".

andyburke,
andyburke avatar

The problem here is arguing on the Internet.

Nougat,

Aldi has entered the chat.

osarusan,
osarusan avatar

Yeah... this sounds like someone who is making excuses for their bad behavior instead of owning their mistake and correcting it.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

Yeah I already made myself clear, I don't even do groccery shoppings in-person anymore, but Im leaving this there now 🤷

snooggums,
snooggums avatar

Just put your cart back already.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

I do when I can! (although lately I have been doing a lot of grocery shopping online)

sin_free_for_00_days,

I had this discussion on here a week or so ago. I guess I’m just lucky enough to live somewhere where the summers are mid 80s and the winters are high 50s. My three friends who got jobs at the local Target all said that the best part of their day was collecting carts.

idiomaddict,

They still collect carts if you put them where they’re supposed to be, it’s just a safer job, because they are where cars expect them to be instead of all over the parking lot fishing lone carts out of bushes and off medians

Maeve,

And they get to get home to family, or relax, or bed faster without getting yelled at or written up for going over budgeted hours.

YeetPics,
@YeetPics@mander.xyz avatar

Cart narc got you, huh?

BaroqueInMind,
BaroqueInMind avatar

Someone sounds like they are projecting...

Taleya,

It’s actually a great indicator as to their view of the social contract and obligations to others.

Alto,
Alto avatar

There's two possible scenarios

  1. you think your time is more valuable than others, thus making you an asshole
  2. you simply don't give a fuck about inconveniencing others, again making you an asshole
YeetPics,
@YeetPics@mander.xyz avatar

I mean… you asked people for red flags that someone is a bad person, not ‘what actions make someone a bad person’.

I think they’re right and Cart Narc did all the field research for us.

Check it out

LinkOpensChest_wav,
@LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.one avatar

Cart Narcs demonstrates that you can lol

Coskii,
@Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

There are two main reasons you wouldn’t return carts to a cart return location:

  1. Fuck them people
  2. My time is worth more than this

At the very least the person is inconsiderate, and worst a complete psychopath. Both are not great signs, and all the ones between are also not positive aspects.

You’d think something that small wouldn’t be much of an indication on a person’s overall nature, but it’s nearly always the little things that add up to the whole thing.

LoamImprovement,

I think really the only excuse for not doing it is you get a call from the hospital and someone is either being born or dying. Otherwise, yeah, put back the fucking cart, you spent an hour in the store, thirty more seconds isn’t going to fuck up your schedule.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

I understand where you are coming from, but most people who do this at times are more likely just ignorant than even "fuck them people". In-fact, the walmart near me has a guy waiting outside along with the security most of the time to collect carts once the store closes, so many people are like "he is going to collect all the leftover carts anyways".

Especially for those who have parked their cars a bit away, I really doubt such people are going to return all the way just to put a cart on the cart return location, rather than just putting the car on the side and just take off with their car.

To make things worse, there are staff on stores often these days that organize and collect leftover carts, so it's been a while since I have seen a good chunk of people return their carts to their return location, especially from parking lots, unless they are close to that return spot.

Coskii,
@Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

Most if not all big box stores have cart corrals out in their parking lots where you are meant to return the carts so that they can be collected more efficiently without having some employee run all over collecting carts. Andtheres the matter of run away carts especially if it’s a windy day. Those carts can really get moving and cause some damage to cars parked out in the lot. No one is saying to take them back to the entrance of the store, simply to put them in the collection point so they don’t wander.

TheArstaInventor, (edited )
TheArstaInventor avatar

I stand corrected especially on one area, I just remembered that there are indeed cart corrals out there in the parking lots, unfortunately my walmart has like 1 on a huge parking lot which is really not enough, but it is true that most stores do have a lot of them, if they are nearby a car and that person still doesn't return the cart, then that's a problem.

Maybe that's why I see staff collecting carts, due to the lack of cart corrals, maybe stores that lack enough of them do this instead, but I am also debating within myself about the fact that there are tons of people that still do this mistake with enough cart corrals.

So I personally think the right conclusion would be, such people are not bad, but not responsible and are ignorant. When possible, returning would make life easier for staff that do collect carts too, they don't have to go all the way to collect all of them. And of course, avoiding the risks of the carts hitting other cars in-case of natural wind, great points that didn't come to my mind at first.

I think this one wouldn't go under bad though as I said, it has to be a lot more than not returning cart back to the car corrals to be a bad person....right??

Coskii,
@Coskii@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

Yeah, I can see it being an issue when there’s a massive parking lot and no return locations. I’m sure some stores did the studies on how much time and workforce it saved to put those corrals out in the lot as most people are inclined to do a bit to help out others.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

The newer built stores especially have no problem with this, but the older not so well planned ones are the ones with these issues.

RickRussell_CA,
RickRussell_CA avatar

For reasons that I can't quite fathom, they've been taking them away in California. Stores that used to have them, don't any more.

Often there isn't even a safe place outside. You could put them up on to the sidewalk in front of the store, but is that the best place? It's convenient for the workers but it also gets in the way.

Zeppo,
@Zeppo@sh.itjust.works avatar

I view not returning carts as inconsiderate or lazy, but most employees I’ve heard discuss this say they don’t mind going out to get carts, because they get the chance to be out of the store for a while.

cobra89,

“he is going to collect all the leftover carts anyways”.

This mentality is just selfishness and self-centeredness. This is the same mentality of people who cause a huge mess at restaurants or movie theatres because “it’s their job, I’m giving them work to do.” It shows an extreme lack of empathy, and it’s very much a “they’re beneath me, I’m helping them” disgusting mentality.

Maeve,

Yes. How one thinks of/treats hired help is a big clue.

Hafler,

Oh man. I live not too far from a Walmart (about 3 miles by car, but 1 by foot with shortcuts). Recently, someone in my neighborhood has started walking to Walmart, filling their cart, then just bringing the cart home with them and abandoning it on the access road in our neighborhood. We are 6 carts deep and my anger towards the perpetrator grows every day.

noughtnaut,
noughtnaut avatar

This is such a strange phenomenon to me. In all the countries I've lived in, all but a few select stores have a dongle on each cart that takes a coin to unlock it from the chain of other carts. It's perhaps the cost of a back of toilet paper, but that seems to be sufficient for it to be exceedingly rare to see an abandoned cart. One can only imagine that any such carts are quick prey for enterprising teens looking for a quick boost to their candy fund.

Kerrigor,
Kerrigor avatar

I'd say it's conditional. At a certain point, it's on the business themselves. For example, a giant parking lot with one or two cart returns only, in a front corner.

A massive sprawling Walmart parking lot with only one return, and I had to park really far away, and it's super busy and trying to get the cart to the return requires going through multiple rows? I'm a goodie two shoes who will clean up after others, and tries to improve places... but I've got limits with time, effort, and desire to deal with crowds of people in parking lots.

If they have good placement though, then yes, it's absolutely on the individual.

RickRussell_CA,
RickRussell_CA avatar

This is the kind of balanced, nuanced take that will get you absolutely murderlated with downvotes.

Alto,
Alto avatar

"But I have to walk a bit further!" Is not a reason to be an inconsiderate asshole

Alto,
Alto avatar

Unless you have a medical reason for not being able to walk to the front to return it, you're still an asshole if you don't.

CmdrShepard,

Not disagreeing with you here, but just for fun, what would you say about a restaurant asking you to wash your own dishes when you’re finished with your meal?

Alto,
Alto avatar

What an outright laughable false equivalency

Maeve,

Moreover, considerate people stack their dishes to the side closest to the walkway.

idiomaddict,

I’d say, if they make it clear that you don’t need to use their dishes, but if you do, you have to wash them, that you’re an asshole if you don’t wash your dishes afterwards.

TheaoneAndOnly27,

God, reading all these comments while baked in a hammock was a trip. I highly recommend the cart saga.

idiomaddict,

Cart saga plus (current top comment): an unwillingness to admit to being wrong

Chef’s kiss

detun3d,

Everyone can be a friend when it’s easy and convenient. It’s during the bad times, when they suffer and it’s not so easy to keep cool, that their true values or lack of come to light.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

Haha yup, that's when the true color comes out!

donuts,
donuts avatar

Not to bring Trump into everything, but yeah... Trump supporters. Bonus level of shittiness if they have a maga hat.

EndOfLine,

“You can easily judge a person’s character by how they treats those who can do nothing for them.”

… or something really close to that. I’m too lazy to look up the actual quote right now.

LinkOpensChest_wav,
@LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.one avatar

Mean to animals

NotAPenguin,

Reminder that eating animals is unnecessary and cruel

Narrrz,

don't worry, people don't eat penguins except in extreme circumstances. even if you were a penguin, you'd be pretty much safe.

CorrodedCranium,
@CorrodedCranium@leminal.space avatar

Being unable to admit they are wrong or don’t know something. I feel like it’s one of those traits that snowballs into someone coming off as obnoxious and elitist

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

I'd say it's when they get angry when you tell them the impact their behavior is having on you, instead of actually trying to have a discussion and sort the problem out.

Or they get angry with you for enforcing your boundries.

ApathyTree,
@ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

Or they gaslight you about your boundaries…

Zak8022,

My personal favorite is when they gaslight you about whose “fault” it was. Failing to recognize that boundaries were only enforced because of decisions they made.

ApathyTree,
@ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar

“I didn’t even know I had this boundary until I met you so, yeah, it’s not my fault this is happening…”

roofuskit,
roofuskit avatar

An unwillingness to admit fault, and/or learn from one's mistakes. It's the biggest and reddest of red flags.

Senex,

How they treat their waitress at a restaurant. Big red flag.

russjr08,

When their opinions are… very extreme.

Earlier today, someone told me that they’d wish someone were no longer living if they mentioned liking a certain type of pizza. It definitely wasn’t said in a joking tone either (not that I’d really want to be around someone who made that type of “joke” in the first place) - that was a pretty obvious indicator that they were a bad person in my book.

It was done under the guise of “I don’t like to sugarcoat things” 🙄

kaden_99,

People who constantly ask for favors.

bjg13,

Literal blood on their hands, bodies falling out of their ceilings and closets, and/or being a billionaire.

SkepticElliptic,

They enjoy the suffering of others.

TheArstaInventor,
TheArstaInventor avatar

Yeah, that's really more cruel

ThunderingJerboa,
ThunderingJerboa avatar

I mean there are degrees to that. I mean sure watching people get beheaded/beat to shit (for no reason) then yeah I think that can be a clear sign. Lets be fair and say much of comedy is based on the idea of laughing at the suffering of others. There are many forms of comedy and typically the target of who is "suffering" changes. Like I just don't think if people watched something like Jackass makes them a "bad" person.

Hyacathusarullistad,
Hyacathusarullistad avatar

"I call them how I see them."

"I'm just brutally honest."

"I'm just telling it like it is."

These phrases are used exclusively by rude, obnoxious, condescending assholes trying to justify being shitty to other people for no reason.

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