What is a gender neutral replacement for man, guys, buddy, etc?

So I’ve realized that in conversations I’ll use traditional terms for men as general terms for all genders, both singularly and for groups. I always mean it well, but I’ve been thinking that it’s not as inclusive to women/trans people.

For example I would say:

“What’s up guys?” “How’s it going man?” "Good job, my dude!” etc.

Replacing these terms with person, people, etc sounds awkward. Y’all works but sounds very southern US (nowhere near where I am located) so it sounds out of place.

So what are some better options?

Edit: thanks for all the answers peoples, I appreciate the honest ones and some of the funny ones.

The simplest approach is to just drop the usage of guys, man, etc. Folks for groups and mate for singular appeal to me when I do want to add one in between friends.

dukatos,

You people

corymbia,

In Australia the gender-neutral term is ‘Cunt’.

Shard,

I thought it was mate

I stand corrected.

dbilitated,
@dbilitated@aussie.zone avatar

not for people you like

corymbia,

There’s, cunts, good cunts, sick cunts, and shit cunts.

Apply as needed.

MajorMajormajormajor,

While a great word, in my neck of the woods that wouldn’t go over well.

Blackmist,

Be the change you want to see in the world.

End0fLine,

Yeah, I only call my friends cunts. Most Americans would not be too happy to be on the receiving end of this one.

corymbia,

You never specified which neck (chin?) of the woods was applicable.

Saigonauticon, (edited )

I just omit the unnecessary words or use their name. That works OK, although I’m awful with names so usually it just becomes “Good job!” or “What’s up?”.

Funny story time: in English I find this is not so bad. In French it’s worse. In Vietnamese it’s awful. We have dozens of pronouns. They’re not only mostly gendered, but contain information about their age and perceived status relative to you. It’s a 3-dimensional matrix where the axes are approximately gender, age/hierarchy, and degree of relation (inlaws/blood relations/strangers). You even get a different word for yourself in some of these situations. Then sometimes there’s a numerical rank inside each pronoun e.g. male uncle, my spouse’s family, 3rd oldest.

The language is already at maximum pronoun burden. Honestly it would just be easier if we called each other ‘human’ or ‘comrade’ or ‘citizen’ or something equally encompassing. It’s exhausting as a non-native speaker (and you are not ever allowed to use their names, that’s considered super rude).

ArmokGoB,

Is this bait?

MajorMajormajormajor,

No, I am genuinely asking.

Gabu,

“Guys” is gender neutral already…

hglman,

Yet is isnt. Y’all however is.

sailingbythelee,

But y’all makes you sound like an idiot.

Silentiea,

I’m not sure what y’all are talking about but the plural is “all y’all”

sailingbythelee,

What’s got all y’all’s balls in a knot, youse folks?

TexMexBazooka,

All’y’all’ll get it eventually

current,

damn guess every speaker of multiple english dialects sound like idiots

sailingbythelee,

No, just that one.

feminalpanda,

Yeah, as long as it’s what’s up guys. Used in a plural sense. If you say you’re a guy or this is my tech guy, ehhh not fun.

OurToothbrush,

Lol no it isn’t. How many guys have you had sex with recently?

OceanSoap,

How many groups have you had sex with lately? ಠ_ಠ

OurToothbrush,

The question I’m asking is literally about a group of guys in the first place, I dont think “guys is plural” is a good retort.

Robotunicorn,

It depends on who you’re talking to. Many people don’t care about saying “guys” as it’s so universal. However, if you’re unsure or meeting new people, that’s where you’d likely want to change it up.

Hey friends! (This can be used for strangers too) What’s happening my peeps? Hello everyone! Hope you both have a good weekend

Or just What’s up? Hiya! Hey [insert their name]

BananaPeal,
@BananaPeal@sh.itjust.works avatar

I like what they use on the Bananas Podcast. “Guys, gals, and non-binary pals.”

JayDee, (edited )

apes!

No_Eponym,
@No_Eponym@lemmy.ca avatar

Danger if you are white and speaking to folks who are not. Lots of history in that word, use carefully.

Matriks404,

Why are you trying to solve a problem that doesn’t exist? Linguistics don’t care about genders in biological sense.

Colour_me_triggered,

Youse fucking wallopers!

therealjcdenton,

Dude

octopus_ink,

So I’ve seen this a lot, but I’m Gen-X and dude was always masculine to me. I support use of dude as gender-neutral, but it’s hard for me to do it naturally because my brain is so locked into dude as gendered.

Aerosmith ain’t helping the situation.

(Also - some of the recent comments on that video are annoyingly predictable swipes at current issues. You have been warned.)

Colour_me_triggered, (edited )

The south is objectively better than the rest of the USA (from my experience as foreigner). Just go with y’all.

Also I use dude with my NB friend pretty habitually.

OhNoMoreLemmy,

Is buddy really a problem?

I’d be more worried that someone thinks I’m treating them like a dog, than a man.

DAMunzy, (edited )

Earthling…Terran - I don’t care how awkward it sounds. It’s awkward for me to change might as well make it awkward for everyone.

Edit: just me being cranky… Normally I go out of my way to make people feel accepted.

Colour_me_triggered,

I support this

crispy_kilt,

What’s up, cunts

Works best if they’re your friends and also you’re in Australia

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