Generally, it’s easier for the internet to understand. But I cannot date because I’m incompatible with other people in a very specific, but essential way. I tend not to explain it to people irl because it’s too awkward and not really essential that people know, but I have tried before.
Mostly medical things but sometimes social things. The social things come to mind first. People have a very strict definition of honest behavior that they often don’t realize is culturally contained, even less so if one was like me and situationally locked into reinventing the wheel. And among the things that are both social and medical as well as play into this is hypergraphia. Hypergraphia is the instinct to express oneself a lot with physical manifestations of what you’re trying to convey, such as what you see. It does not go away, the word choice is not to make me “look smart”, and even if I were to explain things with less words, since I would therefore be packing in more meaning in each word, everyone just ends up complaining I’m being too vague. Exposure to such things where people assume intentions based on habit and don’t judge based on character may be the inspiration to victims giving so much benefit of the doubt and an adherence to structure. Which is ridiculed of course.
Another thing is asexuality is a surprisingly difficult thing to explain to people. You would think it wouldn’t be hard to explain that, due to the biological laws of cause and effect, certain impulses would be easy to explain to others, but it’s not. You have times where it’s either downplayed, undermined, exaggerated, or invalidated. People say “oh that exists” or “can you even feel love” or “how can you have a libido if you’re asexual” or “forget your asexuality, for the sake of the collective”.
It does exist.
I can feel love, just not down there.
The “a” in “asexuality” is for the act, not in the sense of libido.
There is more to a person’s contributions than to the gene pool
Anhedonia is a similarly difficult one to explain. Some even connect it to the asexuality. The psychiatrists I’ve met even jump when you say you’re asexual because they see it as a symptom of depression. I was like this for as long as I remember, it’s not related to depression or my anhedonia. Similarly, anhedonia is not always related to depression. They have different causes. Anhedonia also doesn’t mean you can’t act with emotion, it just means it’s strictly intuitive based on memory.
I don’t like being in the sun. It seems like a normal preference, but I constantly need to explain why (the heat makes it difficult to think, I got sensitive skin, etc. )
It’s especially annoying in a country where most of the population seems to be some kind of sun worshipper :)
Yes, I work in IT, and get paid well for it. But no, I don’t know what’s wrong withbyour PC, I can’t fix your e-mail, I can’t recomment any hardware for you, and I most definitely don’t know how to do that thing you’re asking about on windows 8, 10, or 11.
Reminds me of that subtle joke that I love but nobody else ever seems to get: Well, I defended my thesis in comparative literature, but it seems like he’s got a pretty healthy pulse to me…
lol I don’t even work in IT, but I’m a software dev and I get the same damn questions. No, why the hell would I know how to fix your computer, I write software for sales people.
As an ex musician I lost about half my hearing on both sides. When there’s multiple people speaking in the same room, too loud background music / other sounds or when people talk to me from the next room, I won’t be able to understand a single word.
Also my bones got the density of dry wall due to an illness and many kinds of physical activities can be outright dangerous for me. I broke one of my ribs about a week ago carrying a box upstairs to my new gaff. Slightly bumped it in my side on the banister. Big ouch.
Poeple get so mad when I’m driving them somewhere and I insist on using my GPS. “But I’m your GPS!” Yeah well maybe I want to see how many streets before the turn, or I want alerts about debri, police or road construction.
My difficulty remembering names and where I might know them from doesn’t mean I don’t care or have no memory of them. No, memory tricks do not work and three decades of trying was enough. Just let me know who and where and the memories will come flooding back.
ADHD really sucks when people frequently put so much importance on remembering the ‘right’ details like names. Not rmembering your name does not mean I don’t like you, it means my brain filed it away a couple years ago!
Every time I meet someone I warn them I’ll probably can them Francis for the first few weeks, it’s the only name I remember. After that they usually get a laugh out of it and play along until either the name sticks or they get a nick name.
I’m mostly face blind. I work in optical, so I remember people by their glasses and how they move/walk. I have to have seen someone numerous times before I.can memorize their face enough to identify them, and even then if they look like a celebrity even a little bit my memory will corrupt and I’ll just see the celebrity in my head and forget what they look like.
I’ve just gotten very good at bullshitting through conversations
I have so many meetings with people that i don’t recognize! Actually virtual meetings have been good because i spend an hour looking at people with their name beside them.
Face blind club fist bump. 🤜🤛 I struggle for the first few hours of a new show to tell characters apart if they aren’t wildly different in some way. And when someone I know gets a haircut all bets are off…
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