What helps me is taking baby steps (i share as much as im comfortable and nothing more) and very low expecation, oh and is a huge benefit that the standards in Lemmy don't really exist so that's nice. I also sort by New, which helps me find new post with little to no comments where you can easily interact.
The scariness hasn't gone away for me but I think that's good , getting to comfy on the internet can be a bit dangerous and i mean we are all strangers here so you know , i jusr act accordingly to that.
Right now is encouraged to post , comment and participate as much as you can. A community and network is nothing without engagement from the participants , so i just feel like i am doing my part the best i can even if it isn't the best , at least is something.
As opposed to "read it on reddit" here is more "lemmy post" kind of attitude at the moment. Good luck :)